Creating Your Slut

She'll do anything for the right guy, become that guy.

She’ll do anything for the right guy, become that guy.

Disclaimer: I have been hesitant to publish this post as what I am recommending is strictly for those guys who are fully unplugged, recognize the female imperative in our society, understand the complexity of the attack on masculinity, as well as having allowed the Red Pill to fully dissolve. If you are on the fence about TRP or find yourself aligned with the ‘Blue/Purple’ crowd, this post is 100% NOT for you.

The Family Alpha was created by me for married men who are looking to reclaim or maintain their masculinity and status as an ‘Alpha’ male while being married in our weak society and under the conditions of Marriage 2.0. I never have the intention of providing advice that will lead men to imploding their marriage, but this post covers a topic, that if not properly understood and taken on by masculine men, could do exactly that. My goal is to help you embrace your masculinity, to save the man if you will; I’m not here to save the marriage, keep this in mind.

Once you ‘unleash the beast’ that is your wife’s inner whore, there’s no way to turn it off. As you open her mind to getting that kind of attention from you, having her freely express her sexual desires and fantasies, and getting her to being DTF whenever, wherever, and however you have eliminated the possibility of things ever going back to how they used to be. You will never again be allowed to return to your ‘bluepill’ ways as she simply won’t allow it. If you pull the feminine energy and vitality that exists in your wife from the deepest parts of what makes her ‘tick’, it is now your responsibility to be the man who is leading her and setting the standard from which all other men will be measured, forever.

As long as you remain on point, things will be fine and you will have the exact sex life you want. But if you slip back to your old ways she is going to turn to a man who will satisfy this new craving that you have created. Once she has that taste and feels that it’s ok to let loose, she will desire raw masculine power and want to get tossed around and be physically satisfied.

I had a discussion with one of the moderators on MRP about whether a woman gets turned on by men or whether she is always ‘horny’ the way men are. We pondered whether they feel that way yet only show it when around true masculine energy. It’s an interesting concept and one that I am finding more and more likely as I talk with guys and examine my wife. It seems that they like sex just as much as we do and whereas I used to think they used it only as a tool for securing a high value man or provider (or in some cases gifts/money) it seems to be more probable that when they are around a ‘real’ masculine man(alpha), they want to fuck him just as much as he wants to fuck her.

In marriage it’s not so much so that she can gain something or secure him, as she already has him, but rather because her feminine energy is pulled to that masculine energy and she knows that around this manly man, she can be her pure feminine self, to include being horny & sexually open.

It is up to you, the masculine man in the relationship to create an environment that allows your woman to be her dirty, slutty, nasty self. You know exactly what I mean, no man wants to marry or date a whore, but every man wants his wife to perform like one. He wants her to be his little slut and do all the things he has seen in porn, thought up in his mind, and desired in secret for too long. Married men not only want her perform these acts, but more importantly they want her to actually WANT to do these things to her man.

The amount of effort required to achieve this standard in your marriage varies on the type of relationship you currently have. This is The Family Alpha, so I’m going to cater my message to the married man. Keeping that in mind, there are some aspects of this post that can be used on LTRs and girlfriends. It’s actually much easier to do this with LTRs(0-2 years) and Girlfriends because you don’t have that long term bond/knowledge of one another.

Where a married man may try and get anal for the first time from his wife after 5 years of marriage, a dude with a girlfriend can try it on week 2, or in a LTR after 4 months of ‘dating’. The major difference is that the girlfriend may think he has always been like this and just waited to tell her. The wife on the other hand, she has to face the fact that this is either her husband wanting something new that he saw or heard about somewhere, or he is changing, which is something women do not like.

Another quick warning, prior to getting into the actual How To: Your Mileage May Vary.

Your wife is different than mine and she is different than your buddies. AWALT still applies, yet differently. You must cater your approach to what will work best for your wife.

Another point I want to get out of the way before we get too deep is that your wife is capable of being your slut. Remove the idea that my wife just isn’t into any of that. She certainly has it in her. Whether she was your slut before you got complacent as a man or maybe you’re trying to get it out of her for the first time, it makes no difference in what elements are needed to get the slut out of her. The steps you have to take are the same.

Let’s not forget to mention the elephant in the room. She may have been some dudes little fuck toy before you and if she loved to role play for him and won’t wear lingerie for you, you’re the issue. If you need any more proof of this, read Rollo’s post: Saving the Best

For a few guys out there, reading that post is going to hit too close to home. To them I say this: if you decided to forgive your wife’s whore past, then you must let it go. You absolutely cannot expect your wife to fuck you a certain way just because she fucked somebody else like that. That’s not how this works. You aren’t going to be given anything as she doesn’t owe you shit.

What I’m suggesting and the advice I’m offering here is for you to pull that slut out by being a man who gets women to do whatever is necessary to keep him focused on her. A high value man with options is one who is going to have a wife who is his slut. The actions you take and environment you foster in your family dictate the type of sex you’re getting. Want better sex? Create a better environment.

Back to her past before we get too far of topic. She fucked that other dude and became his sex puppet because he earned it. He ‘earned’ it through his game, kino, alpha behavior, what the fuck ever…he did something that brought out her slut ways. You can too, as long as you are doing it for you and not because you feel she owes it to you. That underlying tone of butt-hurt will bleed through your behaviors and will be detrimental to any course of action you take. Attraction is non-negotiable, you need to kill your ego and recognize that you will get your wife’s best when make her feel she has to give it.

Ultimately, at that point she’ll want to give it to you because you’ll have made yourself a high value & highly sought after man.

There are three areas that require your direct attention and effort in order to get the slut out of your wife.

  • You
  • Removing the ‘Taboo’ associated with discussing sex
  • Fostering an environment that promotes the growth of sexual attraction and freedom

 

You

Rule 1: Be Attractive. Rule 2: Don't be Unattractive

Rule 1: Be Attractive.
Rule 2: Don’t be Unattractive

Again, “Attraction is NON-Negotiable.” if your wife is not attracted to you, she is simply not going to go out of her way and her comfort zone to satisfy your needs. She might love freaky sex, but if the tingles aren’t generated by your actions then it’s not going to happen. It’s not your personality that does it for her, it’s not just your physique that does it for her either (though I’d rank physique above personality on what matters). It’s you as a whole.

When I say you need to work on YOU what I mean is the overall attributes that make you who you are. Your sense of ‘self’ if you will. Physically, mentally, spiritually, professionally, your kino, your game, teasing her, laying active/passive dread, all of it combined is what I’m talking about.

Physically

Are you rocking a Dadbod? If so, you’re off to a poor start. Do you really think your wife should be giving you her all sexually when you can’t even take care of yourself? She does not fuck you because of your ‘winning personality’. Even your amazing ‘charm’ and ‘suave nature’ are not going to get the tingles burning hot when the shirt comes off.  You need to get your physical fitness and nutrition dialed in.

Here’s a quick test to see if you’re where you need to be in regards to your physique:

At this very moment, can you take your shirt off and have a conversation with that hot girl you like comfortably? If not, you aren’t there yet.

I’m not saying you need to be sub 10% bf (though I recommend never going above 15%) what I am saying is that your body needs to be on point, period. If you don’t have visible muscles and decent vascularity, you simply aren’t reaching your potential as a man and therefore your woman is not reaching her potential sexually with you.

Myself, along with two or three other guys on the Married Red Pill subreddit believe that all blame and responsibility lays with the husband. It is up to you to fix this and whether you feel that is fair or not is irrelevant. If you want your wife to be your little slut, then you’re going to have to put in the work, so just do it..or don’t. But, if you don’t you can no longer say you want the most from your wife because you clearly aren’t willing to get the most from your self.

Mentally

Are you displaying that irrational sense of self confidence that is mentioned in The Sixteen Commandments of Poon? If not, you need to be as she has to know that you are 100% committed to this lifestyle and support the message that you’re sending. She needs to be comfortable with allowing you to see into the dark recesses of her mind.

She’s been taught, from birth by our society that woman are not supposed to act a certain way. Even with the more open levels of hypergamy that are being displayed, woman aren’t supposed to want to fuck, simple as that. I’ve never taken a class or had an educator say that all women think about is sex. I’ve had it drilled into my head that this is all men think about, usually making it a negative (along with all things masculine) but never females.

This is why she needs you to be a fucking mentally strong fortress, your mind can’t be shaken by her shit tests, challenges from others, or have any other cracks in your mental foundation. It is this fortitude of the mind that will allow her to trust you enough to let her open up and tell you exactly what it is she wants, thinks, feels, & desires…

I remember asking my wife what fantasy she had that we had never fulfilled. She blushed and said we did everything. We had fucked all over the house, random places, done crazy shit sexually, toys, etc. But I knew there was more, so again I asked her and this time I looked her in the eye and said, tell me what it is you fantasize about.

She smiled, blushed, and said that I would think it was ‘stupid’. I assured her I wouldn’t and that this is the type of conversations we need to have to keep our marriage from ever going stale. She then told me that she had always dreamed of me standing over her and working myself from start to finish, releasing all over her.

Guess what, we did it and without even touching her she almost finished. It was that intoxicating, to have her fantasy come true that was gushing and ever since she has told me all of the nasty shit that pops into her head. Sometimes I’ll do it the night she tells me, other times I’ll do it on a random night to show her that we fuck the way I want to fuck(dominant but not domineering), that I do listen and I will satisfy those desires of hers.

It all started with me gaining her trust and her truly believing that I had the mental capacity to take what she was saying and not make it a joke but rather absorb her message and satisfy her desire. I also had to show that I had the confidence and belief that I could do whatever it was she was asking.

Spiritually

I’m not using the term ‘spiritual’ in any sort of religious aspect. Religion is not a topic I desire to write on and I will briefly mention it when absolutely necessary. When I say that you need to work on the spiritual aspect of your sense of self what  mean is that internal ‘spark’ that exists in every person. That intangible thing that draws you to your wife and her to you.

What you need to do is to relay the message to your wife that by removing the stigma of sex that you two will become closer. You need to let her know that the marriage will improve, that both of you will experience a greater satisfaction from your life, and that the result of an uninhibited sex life will bring you two together on a level that you’ve never reached before. Make her feel what you’re saying.

When you are able to take your ‘mask’ off and show someone who you truly are you develop a bond that cannot be created in any other way. If your wife tells you that she has always wanted to be tied up and fucked in the ass while you call her your skank will you look at her differently? If you have the mental strength I previously touched on then she might tell you something crazy like this. If she does and you’re able to hear her out, not make a joke of it, and understand that this is what she wants from you. Then you actually deliver, you will be closer to her than you ever could have any other way.

This is what I mean by spiritual. Your wife can tell you all of the dirty thoughts she has kept to herself for so long, afraid of judgement and ridicule. But you, her husband, are able to handle it. That is going to translate to confirming her belief and support of your role as the Family Alpha.

She needs to be comfortable being naked physically AND mentally with you

She needs to be comfortable being naked physically AND mentally with you

Professionally

A man who comes home from work bitching about his day is not the man who is going to get his wife’s inner slut.

You need to be the man with the plan, whether you’re the boss or not it makes no difference. How you carry yourself and how you present your work to your wife is all that matters. If you can make her feel as though you’ve got it going on at work, you’re golden.

If you are just a worker in a cube, be the best fucking worker in that cube. If all you do all day is surf reddit, you don’t tell your wife that. You tell her how you managed the funds of whatever, coordinated that strategic implementation of whatever, or how you had to run your team of 5 guys to accomplish what the fuck ever.

Now, I don’t recommend lying per say, as you’ll get caught. But don’t diminish what you do. If your job is that fucked up, find a new one that gives you some sense of accomplishment. She needs you to be her Alpha Fux & Bux. 

When you come home from your job, whether it was a good or bad day, you need to internalize it. In the military I called it Flipping the Switch because I couldn’t bring ‘Navy’ Hunter home, o I flipped the switch and when I walked in the door I was just husband and dad. At home I was just Hunter and if the day sucked balls, I wouldn’t tell her. Remember this important fact, women do NOT care about your feelings. Their Solipsistic nature prevents them from truly giving a shit about anyone but themselves. Again, if you think it’s not fair I don’t give a shit, I’m telling you the truth so find comfort in the discomfort of reality instead of living in your bullshit fantasy world of complacency and ‘Disney’ truths.

With all of this in mind, make your woman feel as though you’re King Dick at home and a fucking stud at work.

Kino

If you aren’t touching your wife, often, then you aren’t building the required level of attraction necessary to reach the point where your woman physically cannot  keep her hands off you. We often talk about giving your wife ‘The Tingles‘ which sounds fucking gay but it’s a real thing.

Touch your wife, let your hands send a message your words never could.

Touch your wife, let your hands send a message your words never could.

I don’t talk about the Red Pill to my wife, nor do I use the terminology with her. But I swear to you, one day as I grabbed my wife by the back of her neck, pulled her in for a kiss, put my other arm around her waist pulling our hips together, she quivered in my arms and said, every time you do that my vagina gets tingly.

Holy Shit, mind blown, I decided from then on out I would use the term ‘Tingles‘.

The tingles are a good thing and as the man that you want your wife fucking, you need to be the one generating them.

Have you ever flirted with a bartender, waitress, your wife’s friend, whomever and the chick puts her arm on your bicep/tricep? Have you ever just grabbed your wife’s hand with just two fingers and your thumb, only for a second just so you could get her attention? Have you ever woken up, looked at her sleeping on her stomach next to you, placed your hand on her lower back and kissed her neck?

That’s Kino! It’s something you need to implement into your daily interactions with your wife. Or if you’re laying some dread, then do it to the girl who you’re interacting with at that moment. Your wife will notice, because kino, in my opinion, is taken from the ‘language of women’. What I mean by that is, kino is covert communication, something women excel at and men fumble fuck their way through.

You want to lay your kino soon and often with a woman whom you want to interact with and get to know better. The successful pick up artists all agree on this point with regards to getting women and just a friendly reminder, your wife is a woman. I have to add that because there are still some guys who get upset their wives don’t think, love, or act like a man would.

They are women, you need to implement kino from the moment you wake up each and every day.

Game

This goes hand in hand with kino. I view game to be the mental equivalent of kino. Similar to how you need to be smooth with your implementation of kino (confidently touching her as opposed to awkwardly grabbing her) you also need to game your wife as a masculine man does. Eventually you’ll get to the point where you are gaming your wife without even intentionally thinking of doing it.

If you don’t know this already, don’t ever take your wife’s outbursts, shit tests, complaints, or pretty much anything seriously.

(Note: take serious shit seriously, use your judgement, don’t laugh if she tells you her dad died)

When you act cocky, smile at her shit tests, steer conversations towards sex often, flirt with other women, grab her and kiss her hard then just leave her standing there…all of this is the ‘game’ that you should be laying on your wife. You can throw in text game, but that’s for advanced guys who know what they are doing and balance the line of not texting too much yet not too little, just enough to give her tingles and get some nudes from her in the process.

You need to game your wife because again, she is a woman. You can’t take the position that because she is your wife she automatically must want to fuck you whenever and however. You need to make yourself irresistible to her. You need to do whatever it is that gets her going every single day.

It’s important to understand that everything I am telling you applies to every day of your life. Just because you had her riled up yesterday does not mean you’ve got it made today. You’ve got to make her fall in love, get the tingles, and be turned on every day and you must start the moment your feet touch the floor in the morning, welcome to marriage game.

Teasing Her

I fuck with my wife constantly. You know the whole, Pick on the girls at the playground concept? I do that and I have since we got together. Why? Because it fucking works.

Talking shit, pulling pranks, just straight fucking with your wife in a tactful way leads to a healthy relationship and it keeps your woman feeling young. This youth transfers to her acting like a young energetic lady, which means performing like a sex vixen. More importantly she is feeling and you know (at least you should) women love to feel deep emotions, good or bad it doesn’t really matter. This is why chicks are addicted to drama, it’s a varying feeling throughout the day.

Now, when fucking with her you must have some skill. The goal is to be mischievous, cute, handsome, & funny – not an immature dick. I would never pull the chair out from under her at a party as that would make her look stupid in front of everyone and/or she’d break her ass. Both are negative and don’t lead to attraction and bonding but rather resentment and frustration. What I would do and have done is something simple like replacing her incense with a sparkler.

She's the girl on the playground that you have a crush on, so fuck with her.

She’s the girl on the playground that you have a crush on, so fuck with her.

She freaked out when it started sparking, and our living room looked like a fourth of July firework went off. She called me all sorts of names, yet was laughing and smiling the whole time. She felt panic, fear, joy, & finally when the smoke cleared..attraction.

Sometimes I’ll hide shit, put things where she can’t reach them, refuse to give a direct answer or give an overly complicated answer to any questions that she should know.

There is a fine line between being a mischievous Man and being a Dick. Be mischievous in your dealings and always have her looking over her shoulder. If you can make it have some sexual innuendo even better. I wrote about 10 ways to keep your wife on her toes which is a post you may want to check out if you need some ideas on how exactly to keep your marriage ‘fresh’.

One Saturday we were having a barbecue and I saw my wife go inside to get something. I snuck in, pulled her to the bathroom, closed the door and thrust my hand down her pants and fingered her to just before she came.Then I hopped out of the bathroom and heard her yell about how big of an asshole I was. The rest of the party she was giving me the ‘angry eyes’ with a head shake showing she was pissed…she came hard that night.

Laying Active & Passive Dread

Do you know what the single greatest compliment that your wife can receive is?

Another woman wanting to fuck her husband.

That sense of external validation will skyrocket your market value as a man through the roof. The more girls that want to fuck you the more your wife is going to fuck you. The more girls you show your wife you could fuck if you wanted to, the better your wife is going to fuck you.

Welcome to dread.

I view there to be two forms of dread that you can lay on your wife. I’m not going to go too in depth on either form as the concept is simple and if you can’t figure it out after reading these next two paragraphs, you’re never going to ‘get it’.

Active Dread is when you intentionally take actions that are designed to ensure your wife is aware that you are a man who is capable of getting chicks. You can get their number, engage in kino, or a number of other means to letting your wife know that if you chose to, you could take that woman home. Getting this attention comes from you laying your game (flirting) with other women. You can’t come across as intentionally doing this or she’ll know you’re looking to get a rise out of her, which will have some blow-back. Instead, you just work your boyish charm and let her hamster do the rest.

Passive dread on the other hand is a level of dread that needs to remain consistent throughout your relationship. Going out without her, whether to the gym, the bookstore, or wherever just getting way from her for a few hours creates some dread. Being physically fit, witty, and successful are also forms of passive dread. You are doing nothing more than merely existing and it creates attraction from other women.

Chicks can sense covert communication from a mile away. When you wear that tailored button down shirt and the ladies are checking you out, eye fucking you, biting their lips, or staring a little longer than normal, you are passively dreading your wife. She sees these signs and she knows these chicks want what she has, this raises both of your SMV.

This is yet another reason lifting is the first action you need to take when reclaiming your masculinity. You must look good in your clothes and more importantly, you must look good naked. The entire process is just easier when you’re good looking, so lift your weights and eat right.

Removing the ‘Taboo’ associated with discussing sex

Now that we’re off the topic of fixing ‘you’ it’s now your environment that must be catered to. You need to create an environment that will promote the type of behavior you’re looking to pull out of your wife. In this instance, we’re looking to create an environment that makes her feel that it is not only acceptable but that it is expected that she speak & act freely when it comes to her sexual nature.

This will take some time and it is on you to keep the topic on the table. One way to get sex out in the open is to actually have sex out in the open. 

I’m not implying that you go out to a park and fuck among the squirrel folk but rather that you take your sexual adventures out of the bedroom where they have most likely been quarantined for far too long. Fuck in the living room, your basement, the car, and definitely the shower. Show your wife that sex isn’t limited to the bedroom nor is it to only be discussed at night before bed.

You can fuck any time and anywhere and you can also discuss fucking anytime and anywhere. There are no chains, no censorship, and no ‘off limits’ any longer between you and your wife. Do you want her to fuck you like she used to, or like she never has before? Then let her know that it’s OK to do exactly that and not only is it OK, but that this slutty behavior will be rewarded through your time and attention.

Fostering an environment that promotes the growth of sexual attraction and freedom

She can be as naughty as you want her, just let her know that IT'S OK to be a bad girl

She can be as naughty as you want her, just let her know that IT’S OK to be a bad girl

When she does what it is you want her to do, let her know it. Be vocal in your interactions and let her know whether it’s what you want or not. If she gives you the greatest lap dance you’ve had in years, instead of asking for more or saying thanks then leaving, give her your time and attention. Go in for a quick snuggle, grab her and pull her close, looking deep into her eyes telling her how fucking fantastic she is and how glad you are that she’s let her guard down.

You can get the slut out of your wife. Whether she was a slut before you met, has never released the whore within, or was your sex vixen in the beginning and the passion dried up; there is always hope. Be the man who gets the sluts and your wife will become the slut. I don’t say it in a negative manner and for the women who’ve read up to this point, if you’re in a relationship it is perfectly ok and quite desired, that you play the role of slut for your man.

Sex is what makes a marriage a marriage, without it you’re roommates or ‘co-parents’. Keeping this in mind a healthy sex life needs to be fostered for there to be a healthy marriage. I hope this helps and I hope you guys are able to create and enjoy your slut.

Acta, Non Verba
Hunter
I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

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39 thoughts on “Creating Your Slut

  1. This is a great beginning guide. It spells out clearly what I should be doing. What I need help with is how to do it. How do I get my wife to talk more openly about sex, etc.?

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    • The first step would be to do it yourself. Show her that you’re ok discussing the subject, don’t push the issue but let it naturally come up in conversation.

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  2. Pingback: Ending the line of Chads | TheFamilyAlpha

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  4. Hate to rain on your parade, but dread doesn’t work. American women are so lazy now that if another woman gave me fuck me eyes the wife would bitch about it, yet do NOTHING to compete with the other woman. She ends up throwing her hands up & giving up because she’s too lazy to compete.

    Teasing, & taking charge mentally & physically? Hamstered as “abuse” because you don’t allow her to do what she wants, when she wants.

    Manhandling her during sex? Abuse.

    Mainlining my physique, staying in shape & keeping myself relatively attractive? See above regarding dread.

    Source: two marriages. If it works for you great. More power to ya. But 99% of American women are like this so there’s no point.

    DONT GET MARRIED

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    • I respectfully disagree about the women being lazy. I would think that it is them not taking crap from their men as much as they were willing to 20 – 40 years ago. None of the women in my life would put up with the dread as well. And I also hear from my female friends who don’t put up with it from their husbands and boyfriends too. Women as a whole seem to be much more secure in themselves thanks to the internet hooking them all up to each other. A woman can Google, Facebook, Twitter, etc., advice about our crap in within minutes now. LOL I know because I did pull the dread thing once and got my butt handed to me within a few hours after she had observed it. So, I agree with you that it usually will not work now, but just for a different reason.

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  5. Hey! So I’m a woman that usually reads the married red pill for entertainment and there are a great number of things on there that I disagree with (and/or find hilarious or appalling in equal measure). That being said, I view you as one of the more reasonable guys on there and I’ve often agreed with your take on things. I never comment or vote on that site (it’s not really my place) but I was hoping that your blog would be an appropriate place to comment and question in a civil manner. Please don’t roll out the hate parade or anything, I don’t plan on trolling your posts. So my question: Where do you get the idea that women can’t love (I’ve seen that in trp posts left and right) or “don’t care about your feelings”? I honestly don’t get where this idea comes from. I can see the thought process behind some of your ideas (tenants?) but I have zero clue on that one.

    I also want to mention that I agree with most things in this post. I am bisexual and I never had really good sex until I dated my first woman. With another woman I was able to say “I have this bondage thing I always wanted to try” without worrying that she would think I was messed up or incapable of being wifey material bc of it. I am married to a great guy now and we have an awesome sex life, but I might never have been comfortable bringing things up with him if I hadn’t been able to explore all my kinks in a safe way before hand. I don’t think having your wives hook up with ladies is necessarily the answer, but the idea behind it still applies. You have to make it ok for her to tell you things without making her feel judged. I think ladies want their men to find them sexy/ dirty but fear they will be found disgusting/dirty. So anyway, I agreed with that part of your post.

    Sorry for the novel! Just let me know if you don’t want me to comment and I won’t, but please refrain from name calling and the like. Thanks!

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    • Hello Whiskers,

      First off, I want to make it clear from the onset that my blog is MY blog, it is 100% owned and operated by me. You and any other woman, dude, trans, animal, whomever will never be trolled as I have approval over ever comment. I am here to improve marriages, specifically for men to become MEN again and therefore improve their marriages via improving themselves. All of that is to say, I don’t want you or anyone else reading my posts to have any hesitation of saying whatever it is on your mind. As long as you have a well thought out, logical response or genuine curiosity, I will approve the comment, even if it disagrees with my post.

      With that said, I’m glad you’re able to read opinions different from your own without losing your shit. Bring some of that to TheBluePill and the place will improve.

      In regards to your questions and story; I never said women can’t love, I did say women do not ‘Love’ in the same way that men do and that is an important point for men to understand. Too many husbands expect their wives to ‘Love’ them in the way men ‘Love’ things, it leads to resentment and misunderstanding between the two.

      With respect to women not caring about a man’s feelings; that is geared more so towards the crowd of guys who think they should act like women do. Women are more emotional and share that openly. It’s ok and totally cool because they are women. I’m not saying men can’t feel as I believe men ‘feel’ more deeply and passionately about things than the ladies do. But for a man to complain, bitch, and just be an emotional wreck that lets his feelings out at every instance to his woman, he is losing ground and respect in her eyes.

      Wives need to know that when shit hits the fan, their man is going to be there for them. That their husband is going to be their rock, standing strong when wave after wave of emotions crash against them. How would you feel if something sad happened and you turned to your husband for support and he was not in control either so the two of you just sat miserable with nobody there to take care of either of you? Someone has to lead and care for the other and I believe that someone is the husband.

      Now, if my dad died right now, my wife would care about my feelings. She would care in the sense that I’m injured and am going to have to deal with a deep loss. I wouldn’t cry to her, I wouldn’t complain to her, I would just let her know that I would need 1 day to sort some shit out. Maybe I spend the night at a pub, maybe I sit at the cemetery and pass out in the field, and maybe I go to the gym and just lift for 3 hours straight. I would give myself 1 day to recover and then I’d go about my business and my wife would ask if I was ok and I would say, yes. It would be the truth because I would be ok.

      Did she care about my feelings, yes. Would she have been disgusted and repulsed by me if I spent the next 3 days weeping uncontrollably over something entirely out of my control, yes. Women do care to a degree and that degree is dependent on how it impacts them. My wife needs to know I’m her rock and the way to show her is through taking the masculine path of being in control of my emotions and not letting my feelings get in the way of my job as a husband and leader of my family.

      When you say, exploring your kinks in a safe way what do you mean. If you had never explored them with the chick, and had gotten married why couldn’t you explore them with your husband? A lot of wives repress their true sexual nature and it leads t oa life that is not fully lived. Men & women need to be their true self in order to get the most from this life. Even if you achieve great wealth and advancement professional, there will always be the void that isn’t filled.

      I completely agree with you regarding the need to foster a ‘safe’ environment. If a guy’s wife doesn’t view him to be mentally strong enough or physically capable enough to meet the needs she wants, she won’t bring it up. This is another reason why I stress that guys actually view their wives as women and how important it is to ensure she understands that being sexually free is what is expected and is totally acceptable. Too often the guys who aren’t getting the kinky sex are the dudes who act like prudes and will trash talk kinky couples as they think that is what their wife wants them to say. In reality, both parties want the thing they are shunning.

      I hope this cleared some stuff up and thanks for the comment. Again, this is MY blog. It’s not MRP, it’s not TRP, I am open to discussion with anyone about anything. Just remember to respect my space.

      – Hunter

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      • I have a lot to say about AWALT (you red pillers don’t even seem to agree on what that really means) and the love thing but I’ll save it. Now that I know I can post here peacefully, I’ll comment about that stuff on another post. On to the slutty stuff…

        By safe, I meant safe from judgement and physically too. I know from reading your posts that you would never raise a hand to your wife, but it is still important to note. I’ve read enough mrp to realize that some guys go off the deep end there and start lifting up their wives and all kinds of shinanigans when they don’t have the trust built yet and it NEVER turns out well.

        I think that men also need to realize that women have (in my experience) much more complex and complicated fantasies than them. I remember my (now) husband and I trading our fantasies on his birthday and mine was being tied up while a girl ate me out as he fucked her while a crowd of people watched. His was me in a short skirt and fish nets. He wanted his to actually happen (and it did!) I picture mine sometimes while trying to ummm… reach the peak, but I NEVER want it to actually happen. I’m possesive as shit and would probably attack the lady as soon as my man so much as looked at her. Guys need to know that fantasy works differently for women and be prepared for anything that comes out of their lady’s mouth without reacting disgusted or jealous.

        Also, I feel the need to mention the importance of oral. (I have been wishing that I could post this on mrp for a while bc it would really help some of those guys out I think!) I usually don’t come from straight up p in v and a lot of my friends don’t either. Eating your lady out before sex is a great way to make sure she’s gonna have a good time and a good time = wants to have more sex. It should also be noted that a lot of women have pussy hang ups just like some men worry about size and that’s why they “don’t like oral”. We’ve all somewhat internalized that middle school taunt about it smelling like fish and I think a lot of women are afraid they taste bad. Plus porn has skewed the way women look at their bits and I guarantee you that you know at least one woman how has googled labia sizes and colors to see if she’s some sort of a freak down there. I agree that it isn’t your job to stop every little insecurity that your girl has, but it pays in spades to address that one. Mention how pretty her pussy is, have her taste herself on your fingers, rub her in your face and tell her you wish you could cover yourself in her juices, etc. It will pay off, I swear to you.

        Last (I’m not trying to talk forever) I wish you would pass along to your compadres that not all women are going to have the same kinks/desires and that they need to maybe adjust their mindframe on that a little bit. I love BJs (Freud would definitely say I’m orally obsessed) and I give them to my man ALL the time. I find them to be super fun and would be quite happy giving one everyday or even multiple times a day. However, my man is 6’5 and porportional and I hate anal. The best anal is extremely unpleasant for me and the worst down right hurts. The red pill guys seem to view anal as some sort of strange sexual peak where if they are desirable enough their wives are gonna drop their skirts and lift their bums in the air begging for the D. This isn’t true. You could be Jason Momoa and a woman that truly doesn’t like anal still isn’t gonna want to have anal with you. And other ladies could like anal as much as I like BJs but hate BJs, or hate being restrained, etc. Just because your woman doesn’t enthusiastically want to have a certain type of sex that doesn’t mean there is a problem. I think that needs to be brought up, because this “If I up my SMV high enough then it’ll be anal for DAYZ” mentality on mrp is, frankly, a little bizarre and will probably lead some men to being disappointed when their newly “slutty” wife still has some boundaries she doesn’t want to cross.

        I know this is all from a female perspective and you are talking to men, but I hope there is something you can use in that (way dirtier than I intended!) missive. I’ll hit up some of your other posts next week when my texting finger stops smoking.

        – Your respectful but dubious internet acquaintance, CC 🙂

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      • Whiskers you’re back!

        Yes, women and men have different ‘levels’ of fantasies, desires, etc. Yours is way in depth and that’s cool as it is YOURS, your fantasies can go as deep or shallow as you want, it’s the sexual version of Inception.

        “be prepared for anything that comes out of their lady’s mouth without reacting disgusted or jealous” again, I agree and if you read the post about the guy who was upset regarding his wife wanting a threesome I told him it was his job to OWN it, not be angered by it as that will just shut her down from ever opening up again. Trust is key and it is a fickle bitch if a man loses his wife’s ‘sexual trust’ he may never get it back. She will always reserve herself that last little bit because she is afraid of angering him again.

        “I agree that it isn’t your job to stop every little insecurity that your girl has” This is where I would tell more guys to pay attention. A part of creating the environment that fosters the healthiest and most open environment is ensuring your woman is comfortable with herself. Whether it is her pussy, hair, C-Section scar, nipples, whatever if she is thinking about that insecurity then she is not fully immersed IN the moment and therefore will not reach the highest levels that could be attained.

        As for the varying levels of kinks and enjoyment of certain acts, I agree and think most men on The Manosphere agree that certain women don’t like certain things. The point of anal is that most women DON’T like it and therefore it is more desired by men. Tell somebody they can’t touch something and now it’s the ONLY thing they want to touch. Anal is used as a gauge because women, even if they don’t necessarily ‘want’ to get fucked in the ass, will let their man do it as they desire their man and will give him that ‘gift of the body’ from time to time. If I see the issue come up I’ll address it.

        As for you, you may want to ice your fingers before they swell from typing.

        Stay Classy,
        Hunter

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  6. Pingback: YMMV | TheFamilyAlpha

  7. “…post about a guy who was upset about his wife wanting a threesome”
    Could you please post link?

    I’m very intrigued about the section re: asking your wife about her sexual fantasies. What if it had involved something with another man, either with or without you? Perhaps the sharing of the fantasy would be enough without action? But what if your wife indicated it was something she’d be interested in acting on? Would that have affected how you view her? It’s that fine line between positive( deepening of intimacy) vs. negative( finding out things you might have been better off not knowing)

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  8. Pingback: 10 Ways to keep your wife on her toes | TheFamilyAlpha

  9. Pingback: Create A Slut Game | Ccstarwar

  10. You men shun girls who are natural sluts, and your wives know that. So why would they go along with revealing their slutty side to you?

    Women have always been very sexually “expressive” with me because they know there is nothing they could do/have done/want to do that could lose them “princess points” with me.

    Of course, there is that about me that makes it awfully unlikely that a lady would prefer another lover. So I have never had the concerns that a competitor might be better in bed than I am…

    Like

      • This thread is about how to get one’s wife to be one’s own personal “slut”. My point stands: if your wife senses that you don’t approve of “sluts”, she won’t be one for you.

        The easiest way of assuring that one’s wife behaves like a slut is to marry a slut.

        Again, marriage is about *children*, not about “sex”. None of “you men” factor in that the most important thing about a reproductive partner is the DNA she brings to the table. (“Bed”, actually.)

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      • You missed my point entirely, who said we don’t approve of sluts? I just said men should enjoy sluts and have fun with them. Marry one? Hell no.

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      • How does one qualify a slut? Is it by the number of guys she has slept with (is there an objective standard), or the kind of sexual acts she has performed before?

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      • It comes down to the man. Your qualifiers for being a slut may vary from mine. But you may have missed the point of this post. It isn’t about figuring out if your girl is slut or not, it’s about turning her into a 100% open and sexual being where nothing is off limits (i.e. a slut who’ll do anything).

        In a marriage/relationship you need to be the kind of man who inspires his woman to want to do all the freaky shit and as frequently as you desire.

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  11. Pingback: Masculine Moves | TheFamilyAlpha

  12. Solid article. I wish my ex husband had found MRP. Our marriage failed for all the reasons listed above and more… Ended after 13 years last week. Hadn’t even slept in the same bed in 2 years. When things go downhill, it snowballs. And no, I’m not fat. He was an alcoholic.

    Like

    • Sorry to hear about your marriage. Hopefully you continue to work on you and ensure the next guy earns a spot in your life vice giving to whomever gives you the time of day.

      Make men pay the price you set (figuratively, not like literal prostitution) for your company.

      Like

  13. Wow. Great article. I came here expecting another ridiculous article on this subject, but it’s the real deal. Not only that, but it was a real wake up call for me. I’ve got a good body, but everything else you described made me realize I’ve been a whining bitch lately and I need to get a grip and man up. I was raised by a woman and have always had a tendency to sorta act like a woman. I now realize this is a bad way to act around my wife and definitely doesn’t lead to sex or even intimacy for that matter. Thanks for helping me connect the dots. Now, off to the gym I go…

    Like

  14. Detailed, insightful, fantastic. I cannot say enough great things about this article. I will keep reading and internalizing it until it is 100% part of me. Though I have a great sex life, I have only been in my LTR for a year and a half and need to start sprinkling this article into the way I go about my relationship. Routine = death. Thanks hunter keep cranking out these bits of wisdom, you are the fucking man.

    Like

  15. Pingback: Weekly Roundup #37 - Charles Sledge

  16. Hello!

    Congrats for all the hard work you’re doing here, your insight is very much appreciated, especially when it comes down to relationships; many of your posts have left me questioning myself and my own needs/wants.

    I am a young woman in a relationship with an awesome man. I appreciate and respect him a whole lot and think he’s got potential to be very masculine. We’re both into fitness, try to eat right, have our own lives with hobbies, goals and friends and we`re enjoying a good sex life.

    However, I am afraid he is sometimes insecure or feels uneasy speaking his mind, at least when it comes to kinky matters (probably he’s a bit afraid of rejection?!). I believe the best way we can go deeper in knowing eachother is via our sex life, always trying to spice things up and come up with new ways we can be intimate with eachother.

    I love sex with him, don’t have a problem initiating and feel awesome seeing how much he’s enjoying himself. I guess he’ll always be more of a stoic while I’ll be the playful little thing, which I do not mind one bit, I love the groundness he brings to the table.

    While discussing various kinks, I am sometimes puzzled by the fact that he keeps saying he also thought of doing that specific kink, but never really initiates or at least mentions them. I want to help him be more in tune with that part of himself, encourage him to speak his mind because honestly, I’d be up for anything he’d wish. Any insight on that? How do I encourage him to lead without being a nag or making him feel he’s not good enough?

    Thank you 🙂

    Like

    • If you tell him that you want him to let you know his kinkiest desire and that you want a totally open/free sexual relationship. Aside from that, tell him what you want and make it clear you expect the same.

      Like

  17. Love your blog. I am a woman puzzled by modern day men and so have been reading red pill threads. I am 49, divorced for 10 years after brief marriage, and I had a good job, so no alimony as so many men feel victimized by understandably. I am so glad I went high school and college in the 1980s as I had a great experience dating. Men took initiative and were good guys. Now I am reading on these threads about spinning plates and ONS and that doesn’t strike me as having a lot of integrity in sexuality or relationships. Men seem to want it both ways – sex on demand with women they met an hour ago and as they put it with “zero to very low investment” on the man’s part. But they want her to be monogamous. And if it’s for marriage – a “clean cut” girl. They can’t have it both ways. I have had very few sex partners and have gone for long periods without sex, not always out of choice. I have never had a ONS. I am so particular for 1) health/physical reasons – unwanted pregnancy and STDs, 2) sex is a big deal to me – emotionally, physically. So guys show interest in me but don’t want to make the investment, so they move on to a woman who has sex immediately. Anyway, my point is they are passing up good women with this approach. Lastly, I am puzzled by why the single men whose threads I have read feel entitled to sex from a woman. And immediately. They are not. Anymore than a woman is entitled to their money.

    I totally realize you are married so this doesn’t apply to you or your blog. However I decided to reach out because I thought you sounded sane and and able to dialogue.

    I have never been with a military man but it’s on my list as I can see they are taught leadership. I totally agree, as a woman, that I like a man who leads especially in the bedroom but also outside. Leads, not domineering. Can’t relate to women who like to be choked during sex though. That’s a definite no no for me.

    Merry Christmas!

    Like

    • I like how you ended that w/ a Merry Christmas lol

      I’m not sure if you had specific question you wanted answered but I’m glad you think I’m sane, that’s a good thing right?

      Like

      • Yes, sanity is imperative and not necessarily common. 🙂 Well, I am wondering what came up for you when you read my post? In general. And then specifically, what’s your perspective on my feedback that men want it both ways sexually? I have read that men are incredibly bored because women give it up SO quickly now. My perspective is there is this lack of self control for a (large?) percentage of men in waiting for sex and wooing a woman. But because the vast majority of women give in quickly to sex because they don’t want to lose the opportunity, the men don’t need to woo a woman and invest in her. But in the long run, many men don’t sound happy, when I read their comments.

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  18. Pingback: Some husbands deserve sex more than others. | TheFamilyAlpha

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