Gentlemen, once you’ve recognized the need to destroy The Void in your heart and eradicate the The Shame from your mind by reaching out to your brethren you can then experience something which has eluded your grasp for too long, a sense of pride.
Masculinity has been under attack for so long that most men now default to not taking pride in any attribute which may bring into question their support of the feminine imperative.
I’m here to tell you – Fuck. That.
As you go through the process of reclaiming your masculine nature you’ll eventually find yourself in a situation where you’re faced with the choice of vocalizing your masculine identity or continuing on with the facade (remaining a Clown).
Brothers, I’m telling you now, after you’ve face down those dark clouds and chose to stop repressing your genuine self, you deserve to take pride in the man you’ve created.
Choosing the comfort of the lie is so easy; it’s so fucking easy to remain comfortable and to sit there and eat what you want, never get sore, and avoid all the discomfort out there in the world; it’s so damn easy. Yet, for whatever reason, you chose to find the comfort in the discomfort of reality. You’ve chosen to express your masculine nature when everyone around you wanted you to do the opposite. You chose to invest in you and live a life as the ‘real’ you vice the scripted you.
Take pride in that brother, you deserve it.
The whole world has told you the opposite. Our society has tried to snuff out that masculine fire since you were born and at some point maybe they did…but like the Phoenix, you chose to rise from the ashes, burning hotter than ever.
You’ve been told not to be a presence, but rather to make yourself meek and unimposing. You’ve been told to refrain from being aggressive, competitive, and lustful in any way. Women have told you to share feelings, your mother has told you to be a nice boy, and teachers have told you to sit still and your limitless energy is something you need to ‘get control over’.
This went on for years and for years you learned to default your decisions and behaviors to that of a man who fit the Mold and didn’t make waves, until now.
When you face that inevitable moment where you decide weak or strong, meek or masculine remember all of the days, weeks, and years where you chose the former and look where it’s gotten you.
You’ve gone long enough beating back your true nature, you’ve repressed your genuine self long enough. For possibly the first time in your life you now have someone telling you, take pride in being a man.
Own every aspect of that newfound sense of self and let the haters watch the show you’re about to put on. While you live, they’ll comment from the sideline. Before you know it you’ll have yourself in the arena and you’ll be laughing at the man in the stands saying the day is hot.
Embrace you and when the time comes, show the true you. Tell people, “No.” when that’s the answer. Stop trying to alleviate your decision or soften the blow by proving justifiers, tell someone No and then go about your business. Own every aspect of your masculinity take pride in:
- Your sexuality. It’s OK to want sex, take pride in that lustful fire burning in your loins.
- Your competitive & aggressive nature. You should want to win. I’ve gotten into physical fights over games of checkers and chess – fuck it, be in it to win it.
- Your romantic nature. Men live hard, they also love hard and have very passionate feelings towards whatever they find of value. I lose sleep some nights because I can’t stop thinking of the men who fucking hate themselves and their lives. My wife asks why I’m not in bed and I tell her my mind is full. Sometimes I’ll share a little and ask her if she knows how I can get these men to just ‘wake up’ and recognize that they are their problem and they are also their solution. She tells me I worry too much about things I can’t control, but also that she is glad her man has a fire in his heart when so many are content and numb to feeling anything or caring enough to do anything about the things that do bother them.
- Your desire to lead. My relationship isn’t 50/50 and I’ve said that to others, it blows their fucking mind when I say that I lead my marriage. Of course they turn to my girl and challenge my statement through her and she laughs saying she loves being able to enjoy the ride while I handle business. Of course there are areas where we come together, she is a responsible woman and she has on more than 10 occasions made the better decision than what I was going to make. I listen and if she’s right I adjust to her plan, still leading the venture. When we are dead-locked I make the final call, think of it as a 51-49 relationship. Embrace your own desire, you’re a man step up and lead, stop waiting for someone to take care of you.
- Your sense of ‘Self’. You don’t need your wife’s permission to grow a beard or mustache. At the same time, you need to make sure you aren’t just going with the easiest ‘self’ you can create. Don’t walk around saying, “My real self plays video games all day, fuck what society and women want me to do.” You have a role to fill, there’s a reason I call this blog The Family Alpha. You’re the leader of your clan, you’ve got to set the standard from which all others will be measured. Be the true you, not the lazy you and at the same time, be the you that you want to be. I have a beard, my wife told me she wasn’t a ‘beard girl’, I grew my beard anyway and guess what, now she’s definitely a ‘beard girl’. Watch what women do, never follow what they say.
The world doesn’t have to love you, you have to love you. It’s time to stop hiding from yourself and way past due for you to stop hiding yourself from the world. Own your shit, take pride in who you are and what it is you plan to do in this life. Pursue your goals and live un-apologetically. There’s no reason to be sorry for being a man, there’s nothing wrong with embracing your masculinity.
The negative feelings you have towards behaving like a man are due entirely to socially constructed ‘rules’ which are set up to keep you contained. Break free brothers and let the whole fucking world know that you are here to win.
Acta Non Verba,
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