Day #30: Finding Comfort in the Discomfort

Day #1Day #2Day #3Day #4Day #5Day #6Day #7(Week One Done)

Day #8Day #9Day #10Day #11Day #12Day #13Day #14(Week Two Done)

Day #16Day #17Day #18, Day #19, Day #20, Day #21(Week Three Done)

Day #22Day #23, Day #24, Day #25, Day #26, Day #27Day #28(Week Four Done)

Day #29

Yesterday’s Recap: Day #29 required you to face a different type of obstacle; being able to relay what you felt in your heart and mind to another.

Sharing your vision is not an easy task, it requires you to take your emotions and something you’re heavily ego invested in and expose it to the world.

As leaders of families, we need to be able to do exactly that.

Nothing about Men of March is orthodox; I’m not telling you to build your team up through positive reinforcement, I’m telling you to share the path you are leading them down in a manner which calls them to arms and gets them to join your campaign towards greater living.

This is theoretical bullshit, this is raw conversation that lets your wife and children know that things are never going back to the way they were before.

The old you is dead, never to return and you need to let them know how they can live an authentic life by your side.

There is no other way to live.

Genuine or death.

Reminder: The rules of Men of March:

  1. You will not masturbate, edge, or touch your dick for pleasure during the entire month. You can have sex, but not with yourself.
  2. You will not watch porn, sexy gifs, look at provocative photos or anything of the sort as this will lead to you breaking rule one.
  3. You will do 100 push-ups every day. Don’t give the ‘time’ excuse, or any excuse as I don’t give a fuck, just do them. Break it up however you have to, but before you sleep at night, 100 must be done; chest day or not.
  4. You must start reading a book. Even if it’s just a few pages a day at first you must be reading a book. I will be reading New World Roninby Victor Pride this month. You don’t have to finish the book in the month, just actively read a few pages every day to build the habit. With that said, my goal is to finish the book this month.
  5. You have to start giving genuine answers to people. If someone asks if you’re busy, don’t say “No” when you are. You have to stop avoiding conflict at the expense of your true self. If your wife asks a question, give an answer, “I don’t know/care” inot an answer a leader gives to his crew. Start knowing, start caring, and start telling the world your true opinion.
  6. If you have a vice, remove it. You have to be honest with yourself; if you’re overweight and drinking to numb or are smoking pot and being unproductive, that shit has to go. This isn’t a ‘dry’ challenge, if alcohol or pot isn’t a problem good to go. If it’s more than that, leave it be for the month.
  7. Every day there will be a challenge, you must complete it.

You’re Red buoy in a very Blue Ocean, stay above the waterline.

Day #30: Finding Comfort in the Discomfort

We’re almost done with the men of March. You’ve likely been more sore, tired, motivated, sad, energized, and sexually frustrated yet equally sexually satisfied in this last month than you have been in the past x many years of your life.

Brothers, you’ve had a taste of life; you’ve learned to actually feel again.

Here is where the cold water comes, nobody cares.

Nobody is going to recognize the sleep you’ve lost, pain you feel, sacrifice you’ve made, or progress you’ve shown.

Nobody is going to go as far as you are and everyone is going to lack appreciation for how much it took to get to where you are – except your fellow masculine brothers…and that’s ok.

You haven’t done any of this for props from others. All of it has been done by you, for you.

Only masculine men are capable of smiling in the pain. It’s why you’ll see our military laughing while covered in mud and suffering from severe sleep deprivation. It’s why in the movie 300 they laugh while arrows are raining from above, “Fight in the shade“. It’s the reason that even when you come home dog tired, you’re able to go outside and play with the kids and read them books before bed; masculine men thrive on the challenge and are capable of finding comfort in the discomfort.

This isn’t just physical discomfort, it’s also emotional and situational.

Having the difficult conversations with the ones you love which, while it may be hard to do, is necessary and therefore is something you have to do.

Telling a friend that they are no longer walking the same path as you and that you no longer want them to be a part of your life is uncomfortable, but it’s something the masculine man knows he has to do.

Telling your boss that you are no longer going to say “Yes” every time he asks you to stay past your working hours may not be the easiest thing to do, but again, the masculine man can handle the discomfort of these situations.

Men of March is going to end and you’re going to have to set your own goals and pursue them.

It isn’t easy when you’re removed from ‘The Brotherhood‘; trust me, leaving the military after 8 years was uncomfortable, but it was something I knew I had to do.

I did it and I found comfort in the discomfort of knowing I was choosing the right path over the easy one.

I no longer had the eyes of my brethren keeping me on the straight and narrow, now I had to ‘self-generate’ the discipline to exercise, train, and keep myself in fighting shape both physically and mentally.

This is where you show the world that you are not just Man of March, but also a masculine man and you’re here to stay and act as a beacon to all others who may need an example to allow them to show their authentic self.

You’re walking off the Men of March trail & are now you’re own guide through this masculine life.

Challenge #30

  1. 300 Push-Ups (You knew it was coming)
  2. Review the goals you set on Day #1, find a way to complete them in the next two days, whatever it takes.
  3. Draw a clear line with whomever it is that has been probing you for weakness. Take a stand for what it is you believe in and make it clear that from here on out, you’re able to have those direct uncomfortable confrontations. You are no longer conflict averse, if someone has been walking over you, compromising your authority, or directly challenging you draw the line in the sand and defend it. You’re here to stay, before you end Men of March crush any doubt of relapse through direct confrontation.

Keep moving forward, the past is done.

Wrapping up Day #30

Nobody but your dog, beer, and brethren will ever understand you or appreciate completely how much effort you’ve put into becoming the man you have become.

Embrace that.

Find comfort in the discomfort of being a masculine man in a weak society.

I should have put a disclaimer at the beginning of this series and I will with the e-book, but once you see the truth of it all, you can never go back.

You’ll never fit in with 95% of the people you interact with. You can enjoy them and you can laugh while creating memories, but you’ll see through their facade.

It is only when you are in the presence of a fellow masculine man that you’ll be able to discuss ‘real’ shit and touch on the subjects most are too scared to even whisper.

This is why the internet plays such a crucial role. The Manosphere blogs, Twitter, Reddit, etc. all of the ‘internet Locker-Rooms’ allow men to come together to have those talks.

I advise that if you have something to ask or it’s worth saying, to create your own masculine corner in the web and have the discussion with your brethren.

You’re a changed man; you see the strings and you have experienced the joy which was beaten out of you as a boy. You know what life is about and the heights that most are missing, there’s no coming back from that.

You’ll always know what it feels like to allow your body to breathe, your mind to breath, and you soul to breath and there’s no going back, ever.

You are a part of the brotherhood, an original member of the Men of March, you should never even consider going back to who you were, you’re greater than that now.

Like a rising tide you’re going to lift the ‘boats'(lives) of all those around you.

If you’d like to donate to The Family Alpha you can do so using the link below.
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15 thoughts on “Day #30: Finding Comfort in the Discomfort

  1. Only found you today.
    Love the concept of “MEN OF MARCH”
    This should definitely be an annual thing. I think it could take off.
    Thanks for sharing your value, helps a lot.

    Like

  2. A few things:
    1. If you’re doing an e-book, send it my way first. I’ll polish that sucker up, on the house.
    2. Change your last (beta-ish) line from “If you’d like to donate to The Family Alpha you can do so using the link below,” to (alpha-ish), “It only takes one minute to log into your PayPal and support our cause.”
    3. I saw a Twitter pic of you without your glasses on. It was a closeup. I said, “Damn, he looks skinnier.” Then I heard you mention that you lost weight during March, but when I saw you in a vid with your beard, I said to myself, “He said he lost weight, but that beard makes his face look round and adds 10 pounds to his look.” I know how you feel about your beard, so I was reluctant to bring that up, but have you ever thought of keeping your beard style, but just using a, say, 4-guard on it until you get to the pointy part at the bottom to keep the style?
    4. I tore a muscle in my back connected to my ribs yesterday, so 300 pushups is out, but I will triple the amount of steps I jog today to make up for it.
    5. Countless thanks for putting this challenge together, man!

    Like

  3. Looks like my last comment got eaten, so let me try this again.

    A few things. If you’re doing an e-book, send it my way first. I’ll polish that sucker up, on the house.
    Next, change your last (beta-ish) line from “If you’d like to donate to The Family Alpha you can do so using the link below,” to (alpha-ish), “It only takes one minute to log into your PayPal and support our cause.”

    I saw a Twitter pic of you without your glasses on. It was a closeup. I said, “Damn, he looks skinnier.” Then I heard you mention that you lost weight during March, but when I saw you in a vid with your beard, I said to myself, “He said he lost weight, but that beard makes his face look round and adds 10 pounds to his look.” I know how you feel about your beard, so I was reluctant to bring that up, but have you ever thought of keeping your beard style, but just using a, say, 4-guard on it until you get to the pointy part at the bottom to keep the style?

    I tore a muscle in my back connected to my ribs yesterday, so 300 pushups is out, but I will triple the amount of steps I jog/walk up the steps today to make up for it.

    Lastly, countless thanks for putting this challenge together, man!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Solid comment

      I cant believe you brought up the beard.

      Not because I’m defensive but because I had that EXACT conversation about looking fat yesterday.

      I’ll keep everything you mentioned in mind, thanks for reaching out.

      Liked by 1 person

      • My sub doesn’t like my weak beard because she claims it makes me look old and fat. I am old but working on the fat part. This is not a woman talking trash. This is my first officer that tells me honest shit all the time. I count on her. To each his own. Once your shirt is off this summer no one will notice the beard much. Haha.

        Like

      • My beard makes my face look fat, I need to trim it.

        Beard vs no beard is up to the man, if you’ve got the genetics, why not?

        Like

      • Just as a counter point, I think changing the donation line is a big mistake.

        Saying shit like “give money to support our cause” doesn’t read as strong confidence, it reads as a money grab. Think of how many political action group emails come throw asking for more money and it just makes your eyes glaze over.

        However, saying if you’d like to support click below says “I’m not doing this for your money, I’m doing this to help you” and every time someone comes back to read a post you are constantly re-extending that invitation.

        I discovered your blog by accident right before men of march, and I was firmly in the “fuck MRA / red pill Rambo bullshit” camp but I found your blog appealing because it’s not like other bullshit MRA/red pill sites. It talks about love for your wife and your family, and that strength and confidence leads to happiness. Thats a message that could have huge crossover with a lot of our brothers who would never normally read a blog like this.

        Don’t step over dollars to pick up pennies – you want to find ways to expand your audience and make it feel like the brotherhood that it is, not some bullshit MRA cash grab, and that’s what “support our cause” says.

        It doesn’t say “I’m here to help you” it says “I’m here for your money”

        Trust me: you could repackage the Men of March in a way that would people talk about it as a great self help book as opposed to something that people might feel is connected to some gross shit.

        You’re changing lives brother – focus on that and the money will come

        Like

      • Thanks for the response man.

        I’m not in this for the money, but I am definitely a fan of $$$.

        I will write & leave the bottom line how it is, if the message has a strong enough impact on a man, he’ll show it in one way or another.

        Like

  4. I’ve been on this journey for about two years now. Ups and downs, mostly huge ups. Men of March hit at a great time for me.

    My journey so far was about changing me and saving my marriage. My sub was working hard as well. But I took this last 30 days and just concentrated on me and my brethren. My son has been all in. My buddy down the road who has been on a long similar journey as myself has been all in.

    Working on me so that I can be the sheiks and the spear those around me need so badly. Detaching a bit these 30 days from anchors I’ve had around my neck. Detaching for toxic people. Detaching from shit that just doesn’t matter.

    So getting in touch with the masculine self and seeing the effects I can have on all that I touch and see. It’s setting expectations of myself that I absolutely know I can achieve even though these are not easy.

    There is nothing I cannot do. This touches all those that I love. We can have it all. Just takes some fucking work. If you’re scared to work, don’t look in the mirror. You won’t like that weak sauce mother fucker looking back at you.

    Like

  5. Only one more day left and I’m proud to say I’ve followed through thick and thin through each day and adhered to the rules (minus a few pushups here and there). The important part is, the wife has been aware and noticed something different from very early on in the month. Without mentioning MoM, I finally broke down challenge 29 to her tonight and it felt fucking amazing.

    As an Asian man being raised mostly by a single mother, it’s been no easy task throughout the years to break out of the stereotypical, emasculated, soft image that we carry. Well, fuck all that, because it’s behind me now. I’m stoked for my wife, daughter, and myself for our experiences to come in the future.

    I’m donating a chunk of my day 4 haul as my token of appreciation. Keep on fighting the good fight brotha.

    Like

  6. @counterpoint,
    You wrote: Saying shit like “give money to support our cause”
    I wrote: It only takes one minute to log into your PayPal and support our cause.

    Nowhere in that sentence does it orders someone to pay. It simply “describes the easy process of doing so,” if one chooses to. Big difference. In essence, it helps donors get over their own mental roadblocks that they’re often not even consciously aware that they have. And using “our cause” instead of “the family alpha” reminds donors that they supporting themselves too.

    But to each their own. I can respect that.

    Like

  7. Pingback: Day #31: The Only Hope | TheFamilyAlpha

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