The family and I had an awesome dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings. We saw my sister and her boyfriend, the kids were great, and the wife and I (being on our new ‘Low Carb’ diet) were able to eat all the wings we could, and we did as it was our first meal of the day, no carbs – fuck yeah.
On the ride home we have to go through an intersection which always has a homeless dude standing their panhandling for money.
Usually I get the green light and I’ll shoot a cursory glance. Every once in a while I hit the red light, but it’s a double turn and I’m always on the lane away from him.
Today, as I was driving to that intersection, I decided to take the lane next to the guy. I did this mainly because my wife didn’t want to be next to him as the homeless creep her out, but more than fucking with my girl, I had a gut feeling, and I always trust my gut.
We hit the red light and were right next to the dude.
There was maybe 15′ between him and I, a windshield was all that separated our two worlds and for some reason, I was absorbed into that moment.
I didn’t just sit and stare at him like a weirdo. I tactically observed him, looking at him without looking at him, but then it happened, we locked eyes and that brief moment felt like an eternity.
They say that the eyes are the windows of the soul; I saw into this man’s soul and I know he saw into mine.
Few know how revealing the eyes are. They’re one of the primary outlets of our vibrations. You can feel when someone is looking at you, you just sense it. I was looking at this man, his eyes would tell me if he was a scammer looking to swindle money for booze, or they’d tell me if he was genuinely someone who had nowhere else to go and was relying on generosity to make it another day.
I’m very good at reading people.
I pick up on small, almost invisible nuances of body language, tone, rate of speech, inflection, and most importantly, eye language. I can tell what motivates an individual and what scares them in a single conversation. I can find out who I need to be to get what I want without them saying a word.
On more than one occasion I’ve been asked if I was psychic as I unintentionally showed my hand and revealed what I knew about the person without them ever telling me.
I expected the same when looking at this man; but what happened was entirely unexpected and it had a great impact on me, I’m still recovering from it. I’m still tossing it around in my head, this is obvious as I felt I had to write it out here…
When we locked eyes, it’s like we traded energies for a brief moment in time, or we fused and our vibrations aligned.
I could see his crystal blue eyes, his weather hardened skin with dirt in the wrinkles around his eyes, the wrinkles that didn’t form from laughing but rather from being unprotected from the sun and elements.
What has this man seen?
Was it one major decision or a series of wrong ones which led to reaching this point?
Why am I in a Jeep Wrangler, driving my nuclear family to my nice air conditioned home while this man is standing out in the cold where he’ll sleep with all of his possessions in a shopping cart he stole from Walmart?
My wife told me that the light was green; I drove off, lost in my mind.
We all need to appreciate what we’ve got and where we’re at in life. We also need to recognize that the only reason we’re writing and reading on the internet while others are fighting for a blanket or food is because of a few decisions and chances falling in our favor; maybe just one event went our way and it saved us from a life of pitiful suffering.
Who’s to say that North Korea doesn’t Nuke us tomorrow? Who’s to say that an ANTIFA riot doesn’t break out in your town tonight? Who knows if the next chance you take is one too many and you end up losing all that you gambled?
Immerse in the now, Hang the Polaroids while you can, because you’re never guaranteed another opportunity to create one.
Enjoy your warm showers, soak in the smiles of your children, the laughter of your wife, and the presence of your dog.
None of these are guaranteed, immerse in those moments while you can and remember that life is nothing more than a string with these memories attached to it.