cigoL Fat Edition

This will become a running series of sorts. Backwards logic can be found in most modern movements, such as the ‘Health at every size‘. With that said, this post will obviously be focusing on the Fat that’s weighing my country down.

To think you can ignore a problem until it resolves itself is so backwards and illogical that if I hadn’t witnessed it firsthand time and again, I’d never believe people actually behaved like this.

Saying you love someone more than anything yet you’re unable to directly confront them on an issue should show you that you do not love them more than you love the current comfort you’re enjoying in your life. That obese child is not going to ‘grow out of it‘, that chubby teen girl is not going to ‘blossom into a beauty‘, there is never going to be a ‘right time’ to have the difficult conversation with these loved ones about their issues…

But you have too…if you do not, they’ll eventually reach the point of ‘no return’ and forever suffer the entirely preventable negative health complications which could have been avoided had you only had the courage to say something.

I’ve already covered the growing (no pun intended) population of Funny Fat Guys as well as the need to work with your wife to Balance the Scales so I will focus this post on those we interact with on a relatively frequent basis or are a part of our lives and we give enough of a shit about them that we are willing to take the difficult, yet necessary actions.

*I’d like to note, this applies to those who are extremely underweight as well.

We’ll be covering:

  1. Fat Family
  2. Fat Kids
  3. Fat Friends
  4. Fat Pets

Fat Family

You don't have the time you think you have, act now before it's too late to make a difference.

You don’t have the time you think you have, act now before it’s too late to make a difference.

You may have a fat mom, dad, brother, or sister and while you’ve noted their growing weight and declining health, you’ve avoided directly bringing it up or looking the other way when they struggle to get out of a chair, move around a restaurant, or fit on a plane; how has that worked for you and them so far?

How has their life improved because of your silence? How are you able to talk about their declining health, possibly to other members in your family without reaching the point where you throw your comfortable relationship to the side in order to do what must be done?

You must make the difficult decision now to risk losing that person and forever ruining the relationship in order to save their life.

I know it sucks, I know you feel your heart try to rip through your chest when you think of it. I know you feel you won’t have the right words or that the conversation will turn immediately to blame, yelling, anger, regret, guilt, etc.

I know that this could result in a strained relationship for the rest of their life without improvement of health on their part so you’ll feel it was all for naught…

But that isn’t the truth, because if you do make the decision to have that conversation and take that more difficult path of direct confrontation, you’ll be able to go to the grave knowing that at least you tried.

When everyone else stood in the stands watching this loved one eat themselves to the grave you stepped into the arena and fought.

Maybe you win, maybe you lose, but at least when your family member is struggling with confidence, unable to live, and slowly dying in front of your eyes while all others wish they’d done more and for the rest of their days will have that regret, you will not, because you acted.

Others may say that you calling your family member out is disrespectful, especially if it is a parent, but this isn’t about respect or allowing others to remain comfortable, it’s about life. When you are fat you lack confidence, you lack physical capability, and you suffer preventable health complications on the mind as well as body. You carry that weight mentally, physically, and spiritually.

You cannot hang Polaroids if you cannot live…

Fat Kids

This is becoming the 'norm' Stop It

This is becoming the ‘norm’ Stop It

Your children will perform to the standard you accept, not the one you expect.

There are a lot of parents of fat children who talk about how, back in their day they didn’t have tablets. What kind of bullshit sorcery are these people talking about, these parents buy their kid a tablet then bitch about kids on tablets.

They can’t bitch about kids on tablets, I can because when the sun is out, my kids are out. I’m not having a screen raise them, in fact I advise families Kill the TV and start investing in quality time together.

Fat kids are the product of weak parents, this is a non-negotiable fact and I have spent hours arguing/discussing this with people in my real life and online. There is no reason a child should be overweight *barring diagnosed conditions which are wicked fucking rare & even those conditions only account for 10-20lb weight gain.

The reason kids are fat is because they are sedentary for a plethora of reasons, their diet is fucking shit, and their parents don’t give a fuck or are placing emphasis on work and comfort over the more difficult path of actually raising their Sons (Post Here for Boys) & Daughters (Post here for girls).

Your child’s life is heavily influenced by the standard of upbringing they receive from you, the parent. The habits, relationship with food, fitness, and overall approach to life will be developed from the actions you’re taking.

Kids follow your example, not your advice.

If you are eating right and working out, there is no reason that you should not be applying this to your child’s life as well. They are never too young to get active and get moving with you or on their own.

My daughter is 4 and she was downstairs with me today doing kettlebell swings while my wife and I dead-lifted. Then, she was showing me how close she is to doing a split and asking about stretches. My son is the same way, always doing push-ups or climbing, running, etc. The kid was outside late last night using our front light as a spotlight so he could keep throwing his football in the air and try to catch it one-handed “like Odell Beckham Jr.

Foster an environment in your home where you cook with your kids, have them cook for you, and while you’re doing so talk to them about the ingredients being added and what each one does for your body. Make your kids a part of your exercise program and have fun with it.

This doesn’t have to be some strict food & fitness Nazi style parenting. My kids have snacks, but instead of ice cream I’ll give them frozen grapes, or they’ll make their own fruit concoctions.

Make it fun and develop a healthy household where people eat to live and aren’t living just to eat.

Fat Friends

This photo has always disgusted me, it was the beginning of my understanding of how far men have fallen.

This photo has always disgusted me, it was the beginning of my understanding of how far men have fallen.

People say you’re the result of those you keep close company with. Look at your friends, are they fit or are they fat?

Have you ever approached your fat friend or are you taking the, “They’re an adult, I don’t have any business or responsibility saying anything to them about their weight.” approach? Because I’m telling you right now, if any of the guys pictured above were my friend I would absolutely be talking to them about un-fucking their life.

What’s the worst that can happen, you lose a friend because you tell them they are going to destroy their life for no reason other than being gluttonous? Is losing someone who can’t take your advice/opinion really a friend in the first place?

I get it, we all want to be comfortable and just have a good fucking time, but these guys and girls who you call ‘friends’, their fat selves are going to start experiencing the pain of being fat and act like they don’t know why they’re sick, why they can’t get pregnant, why their joints hurt, why they can’t climb the mountain or jet-ski with you and your girl…

They’re going to suffer, and suffer, and suffer all because nobody has the fucking balls to tell them that all of their extra weight is killing them.

Grab your fucking balls and have that difficult conversation, if you lose the friendship then at least you know how weak it was in the first place.

Fat Pets

I focus on dogs as I’m a dog guy, insert whatever pet you have; the advice remains the same.

I don’t laugh when I see dogs that are fat as shit and have a hard time running around. I’m a ‘dog guy’, the photo above is my most loyal companion, the only thing in this world which loves me more than himself and I’ll never stop appreciating that.

When I see bulldogs or other dogs which have a stockier build I immediately look to see if the dog is being treated like he’s a frat brother. People think certain animals are supposed to be fat so they’ll feed them Cheetos, have them drink beer, and just treat the animal like it’s a fucking garbage disposal. They don’t exercise it regularly nor do they bring it anywhere to ‘experience’ the outdoors.

Your dog doesn’t need to be eating Blue Buffalo, but god damn, give some attention to what it’s funneling down its throat.

The same goes for exercise and ‘life experience’. Has your dog ever been to a lake, the ocean, a park, or the woods? If all it has seen is the block you walk around and your backyard, why the fuck do you have a pet?

This animal needs to burn energy; a tired dog is a happy dog.

I bring my dude places in the Jeep, sneak him to a lake we aren’t supposed to swim at, let him run the woods, and we get Target brand food. The best? Negative, but it’s better than the crap that you get for .99/lb we’ll also supplement his food with richer proteins & meat occasionally.

Ensure you’re setting the standard for everyone in your clan, too include your loyal companions.

I understand this is a sensitive subject, but when you look at the ‘big picture’ isn’t a little discomfort now, better than a big discomfort later when everyone realizes that maybe their isn’t health to be found at every size…

-Hunter

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Queen & Warrior

In marriage you need a woman who can handle shit the way you'd want her to without having to hold her hand.

In marriage you need a woman who can handle shit the way you’d want her to without having to hold her hand.

Women are submissive by nature and in a healthy marriage a wife will defer to her man when confrontation is required. When vetting your woman, look for her submissive nature while at the same time looking to ensure she’s a strong woman.  My wife submits to me alone, I don’t need her strong in the sense that I need constant support as I’m her Lover, her King – not her child. Look for strength in your woman in the sense that she can be a badass bitch who can lead when you’re not around.

This is a story of a woman who had to go into battle without her husband, a woman who had to stand her ground while her man was at war, the man who is normally both the shield and spear of his family.

About two months ago I was reading The Nine Laws by Ivan Throne when I came across this quote:

“The voice of his mother, which used to sing to him and lull him to sleep as one of the sweetest sounds of the universe, was now silent. There was only the great effort of slowly mouthing words, beginning the long and exhausting process of teaching the boy to lip read as if his life depended on it… and it did.”

I was sitting in my recliner while my daughter was drawing, son was writing, wife was reading, & dog was by my side – and my entire world came to a halt. I put the book down and just looked at my son, then at my wife.

Queen

You see, when my son was a few months (maybe a year) old he started to get ear infections. This went on for a little while then it just stopped, we thought we were in the clear. Then one day he started acting ‘off’,  my wife brought him to the Doctors and they told her he was teething, no ear infection.

It’s important to note that I was in the Navy during all of this. I was in and out of the country at a high tempo and it was on my wife to handle finances, our new son, and living on her own. When I came home from one underway I noticed the change in my son. My wife told me of the hospital results and as new parents we listened.

Then one day it got worse…

My wife brought him back to the doctors after a few months of this and told them of the sleepless nights, the delay in reaching ‘speech milestones’ and the pain he was in.

Tests were done and a result came back saying that he must be sick or is having a hard time with teething, but there was no ear infection. I remember getting the emails from her (I was out to sea again) telling me what was going on, the test results, the actions she was taking, etc.

I felt helpless as I was thousands of miles away, in the middle of the ocean, while my wife was alone and my son was in pain – it was frustrating; but my duty was to my country and I told her that there was no way for me to come home early. I had a job to do and as fucked up as some may think it is, in that life it goes Navy then Family.

Warrior

Upon recognizing the reality of the situation and that her man wasn’t here to fight this battle, my wife took matters into her own hands. She went back to the hospital, with my son screaming in pain, and planted her battle flag.

It was the flag which held my crest & name of my clan and then there was my wife, representing myself and my heir, standing at that hospital with her fucking war face on.

She requested the tests, when denied as they’d ‘already been run’ she demanded them be run again. She then told the nurses, Doctors, and whoever would listen that she was not leaving until my son was treated.

They ran the tests.

Results came back.

My son had an undiagnosed double ear infection. This ear infection had gone untreated for months and in that time it had wreaked havoc inside my son’s ears. His speech delay was because he was deaf, our boy couldn’t hear the world around him and we didn’t even know it.

Flash back to 2016, I’m sitting in my recliner and my world has stopped. As I’m looking at my son I realize, the passage I just read could have been written by him, then I look at my wife and realize it would have been him if it wasn’t for her.

Wife

My wife saved my son from the silent world. She saved him from a very challenging life because she was able to put her armor on, draw a line in the sand, step over it, and plant her flag telling the world, “I am not going to back down from this, submit to my demands or be destroyed.” She forced compliance.

I will never forget this. I came home from my underway and she told me what it is she had done. I was a proud man and had a newfound respect for this woman who took my last name.

Since then, we have had to go through speech therapy, multiple sets of tubes, and other steps to treat the damage. I remember the first time we went to the beach after having tubes put in, he was scared of the waves because every time before that day, they were silent; now he could hear them crash. My wife almost cried and I almost did too, not because of what had happened, but because I was able to appreciate the little things he could now hear. The sound of waves, a bird overhead, music…

My son is now a strong, intelligent, and popular kid who is able to hear the sound of his mother’s voice, the sound of his father’s lessons, and the pride in his younger sister’s voice as she follows him around.

Lover

My woman didn’t fall apart when I wasn’t around. She didn’t crumble under the stress of running a household as a single parent while I was out with my brothers in arms, taking on a different fight. She knew I had a job to do and she knew she did too, so she did it. Because of her commitment to our clan, she didn’t run to mom or dad, she didn’t sulk and cry, an she didn’t just accept ‘No.’ as an answer. My son can hear and it is the direct result of action taken by my lover, my warrior, my Queen, my wife.

Hunter

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Creator of Life

When I had kids I knew my life had changed forever - I was fucking pumped.

When I had kids I knew my life had changed forever – I was fucking pumped.

This is a continuation of my Burden of Family post.

A friend of mine, the creator of the blog Unlocking the Crown recently returned home after his wife delivered triplets. We spoke a few times while his wife was sleeping still in the hospital and I could feel the masculine energy flowing through him. Here he was riding on X minutes of sleep, taking care of his wife, 3 babies, and everything else required to make the transition from hospital to home go as smooth as possible and when we spoke it was like it was just another fucking day.

Aside from my wife, he’s the only person who knows of my blog in my ‘real’ life. So, naturally we touched on the subject of masculinity and fatherhood. During the discussion he said something which inspired this post, he said is isn’t hard managing all of this because these are his kids and that’s his wife, and he was a part of making this happen.

Complete ownership. If you’re going to have kids then you’re going to have to fill the role required of you when the kids show up.

If you’re a father then you played a role in creating life and that means something. No matter how awesome or awkward and uncomfortable the sex was, you had it and a baby was the result. I don’t care if it’s with your wife or with a one night stand; if you played a role in creating a life, then you need to assume the responsibilities that come with the title Father.

You’re poor?  I don’t care.

You’re Young? I don’t care.

You’re really busy? I don’t care.

You didn’t want it? I. Don’t. Care.

You see, as a father I understand the magnitude that comes with raising a life in this day and age. I have two children, a 7 year old boy and a 4 year old girl and both are in the process of becoming productive, educated, intelligent, good members of our society.

I became a father because my wife and I chose to have a kid, then we did. We made the decision again, and had another; now we’re good.

There is no difference between what is expected of me, a 29 year old married man and the 16 year old boy who just knocked up his freshman sweetheart.

You do your fucking best. You remain as present as you can and you provide the necessities. If the mother wants to be a bitch about it then you get legal documentation which clearly draws the boundaries for time, supervision, requirements, etc.

I don’t live in a fantasy world where kids aren’t having unprotected sex, I know that it’s going to happen, I know right now some kid is hitting it raw dog and doesn’t know enough to pull out because it feels to good and in September he’s going to see a ball of flesh coming out of where he was cumming in.

My aim with this blog isn’t to fight teen sex; part of my goal with this blog is to provide a resource that will raise the standard of men who will then act as an example for the young men in their life. If you act like a masculine man then the boys around you will act like and become masculine men. When they purposefully or accidentally have a child, they’ll act as a masculine man does – complete ownership.

Single Gents

You don't need a Queen to be a King. You don't need a wife to be a father.

You don’t need a Queen to be a King. You don’t need a wife to be a father.

Had sex with the girlfriend or or one night stand and got her pregnant? She (you both) decided to keep the baby?

Cool, it’s dad time.

*Do not think that because you got this woman pregnant that now you have to marry her.

If it was a one night stand, you need to let her know to keep you in the loop. Maybe you’ll try and go steady and figure a way to become an LTR or maybe you’ll just stay in touch over baby things. Both are acceptable options, the key point is you need to know what’s going on with the baby. 

For the one night stand or girlfriends alike, ensure you’re aware of doctor’s appointments, any complications, preparations for where the baby will live, getting stuff together for the arrival, planning for names, etc. You’re a part of all of this and the best thing you can do is remain civil with this woman. You may not know her at all, start discussing family history, finances, plans, etc.

Don’t kick this can down the road even once, start having the conversations early and often. Keep her on Team You the last thing you need is this chick disappearing or turning against you.

Once the baby has arrived, make yourself a part of it’s upbringing. If that means every other week or whatever so be it, but make yourself a part of this child’s life from the onset and continue to do so throughout all the years.

Married Dad-Bod Beta Schlups

Fuck the Dad Bod - I fucking hate it and hate the men who make the population I am a part of (fathers) look like pathetic pussies.

Fuck the Dad Bod – I fucking hate it and hate the men who make the population I am a part of (fathers) look like pathetic pussies.

You’re the group that really needs the most work. I’ve seen fat, disgusting, weak dads ‘being one of the girls’ with the other moms at the football, baseball, and soccer games and practices I have led.

Understand this now, your child is going to follow your example not your advice.

Being out of shape, trying to keep up with the trends of society, having no hobbies other than sedentary TV time – is that what you want for your kid?

Your dead-bedroom or 1x a week sex life is pathetic, your wardrobe is pathetic, you aren’t happy even though you try to convince yourself you are, and your physical limitations due to poor health choices have you unable to raise your kids to becoming healthy productive embers of society.

When you have kids, you’ve removed ‘Zero Days’ from your life. You need to be the example from which they will measure their performance physically, educationally, spiritually, etc. Being a fat slob tells your kids that when they get married or have kids that they should get fat too.

Start trying again, get back to giving a fuck about life. Treat your wife like you did when she was your girlfriend, treat your children as pupils who you’ve got to to train for life, and treat yourself as an ever improving project that always has an aspect tat needs to be work on, honed, and improved.

Masculine Men

Lead your children through life

Lead your children through life

You’re on your game, you’re following your mission, you look good, sex is great, life is solid, and you’re pursuing improvement both personally and professionally.

The biggest concern I have with my fellow masculine brethren is that they get too Mission Focused grinding day in and day out to improve and raise their standard that they don’t make ‘family’ time a slot in their schedule.

Men grind day in and day out, trying to build their side hustle to something more. But, at what expense?

You can’t put your family before your mission, at the same time you’ve got to make time for them. Steve Jobs is an excellent example of this. The dude could have made his family a part of his mission and it probably would have benefiited him and improved his leadership skills. Instead, he disowned his daughter as she was an inconvenience to his pursuit of Apple greatness.

You need to follow your mission in life, but when you become a father you need to look at the opportunity cost and recognize that the time you invest in your child is not wasted time.

Make them a part of your mission and you’ll find it leads to you becoming even more efficient at leading your family. Get them on-board your plan and share your vision with them, let them see the how and why you do what you do.

When they understand why you grind you’ll find that they support you and defend you from others. Your kids will say my dad’s not here because he’s working on X. Or your wife will say, when some bitch tries making a remark on your absence, that at least her man has passion in life and is pursuing dreams.

They’ll support you if you make them a part of the greatness you’re chasing.

All Dads

Fill your role

Fill your role

There are too many children out there who don’t have a masculine father figure in their life. Having a blue pill ‘plugged in’ father is better than nothing, but a child will reach the fullest development when they are raised by the balance of the masculine and feminine.

Fill your role, be the child’s shield and spear, protecting it from the world while fighting off all who threaten it’s existence.

Similar to being in shape, 90% of the battle is just showing up. Show up, you’ll figure the rest out as you go. Keep piece with the mother and if that isn’t going to work then legally ensure your rights are represented and documented.

This child needs you, it’s time to step up brother.

Hunter

I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

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The Walking Dad

The Walking Dads are growing in number day by day

The Walking Dads are growing in number day by day

I’d like to make it clear from the get-go, I have never seen a single episode of The Walking Dead. What I have seen is enough commercials and people who love to talk about it so I have an idea as to what the show is about. Keeping that in mind, when I think of The Walking Dead and try to relate it to the world we live in, what I envision is all of the fat men who are wandering around Target holding their woman’s purse. All of those brain dead Dadbod zombies who are going from consumption to consumption.

You know the cycle: Guy wakes up late, eats crappy food, consumes bitter coffee, climbs into vehicle and listens to commercialized music while heading to a job that he hates. He then does that job for 8 hours, wasting time scrolling on Facebook looking up girls from his high school days.

He then leaves his job, listens to shit music, gets home and has a sort of interaction with his family which kind of appears as conversation but absolutely nothing of substance is discussed.

This photo has always disgusted me, it was the beginning of my understanding of how far men have fallen.

This photo has always disgusted me, it was the beginning of my understanding of how far men have fallen.

He then works his way to the television and it’s here he remains until it’s time for bed.

Then repeat – for years…

  1. At no point in this daily cycle does this man generate a thought of his own.
  2. At no point does this man think, “hey, something isn’t right.’ He might get the feeling, that hunch of ‘something’ being wrong, but like all of his masculine tendencies, he bottles that hunch up and shoves it deep down, way beneath his love for Lena Dunham.
  3. At no point does this man, who has had kids, think, “Maybe I should get involved in raising the standard of my children and their standard of life and self.” You see, his son has no idea how to be a man as his dad is more likely to support him dressing up like Hillary Clinton than teaching his that boys and girls are not equals and his daughter has had a toxic example of what relationships are supposed to look like for so long that she thinks in marriage the man is supposed to be a weak doting buffoon.

Gentlemen, we don’t need to watch a TV show on AMC to get our zombie fix. We have real world walking dead all around us.

It is with the greatest misfortune that a majority of these walking dead are walking dads. It is as though as soon as a man reproduces his brain becomes numb to any internal or external stimulus which will invoke passion or masculinity. It seems that the only motivation that sparks up is that of consumption. Dads consume baby gifts, TVs, Beers, cars, houses, shitty clothes, and gym equipment which is never used (If it’s bought at all).

Ask any father you know whether he has read to or with his kid in the past month and you’d be hard pressed to find one who can say yes.

Ask one of the dads you know if he has brought his son to the outdoors or a gym to teach him something about the world or the beauty of physical strength – I doubt you’ll get a yes.

Fathers have become fat & sad jokes of society - become the solution to this problem.

Fathers have become fat & sad jokes of society – become the solution to this problem.

Ask a man if he’s ever had a conversation with his daughter about the importance of strength and smarts as opposed to physical beauty for advancement in life – do you get crickets?

Now, ask the dads around you if they know who A is from pretty little liars. Ask them if they know all the lines from Family Guy or The Simpsons. Ask these men if they’ve got the newest phone or their wife has the best iPad and I’m sure they’ll be fucking pumped to tell you how fucking cool their gadgets are.

These ‘men’, they truly believe in the weak mantra of Happy Wife Happy Life

What can we do to fight these plugged in zombies?

Drop the cure of masculinity here and there via being a living example of what’s possible.

The solution to this epidemic is not to cut the heads off the zombies; but rather, to offer the cure. Some of these dudes are lost causes, do not expend too much energy on their behalf – if a man wants redemption, it won’t take much of a push as they’re already on the edge.

The cure for this zombie apocalypse is masculinity. Raw, powerful, lifesaving masculine power is what will cure these zombies, it’s what will kill the Walking Dad.

It’s not just fathers, but the point remains that married men with kids are the hardest hit group of men out there. They are the population I have found myself a part of (Married w/ kids – not walking dad), so it’s the group that has received the most of my attention. We need to act as examples and lay some lines here and there that inject the truth of reality into these lifeless souls.

Maybe it will enter the blood stream and cure the individual or maybe it will dissipate and the zombie will continue to live its perfect weak consumer lifestyle it has up to this point.

The consequences of being one of these ‘Walking Dads’ goes way beyond having a dadbod and being afraid of conflict.

The progression of demasculation

The progression of demasculation

Let me paint a few pictures to illustrate the vast range of consequences that come from being a part of the Walking Dads:

  • Dadbod zombie is walking down the street with his daughter who resents him, son who despises him, and wife who hasn’t been attracted to him for the past 5 years. They come across a group of thugs who view them to be easy pickings as the dad is an obvious pushover and the rest of the family is oblivious to the threat as they haven’t had a masculine leader to prepare them for the evil of the world.

Wife loses purse, husband and son get broken jaws, and daughter is traumatized from threats of thugs.

  • Hillary Clinton wins election and an entire city erupts in rage as the system is rigged and the population can no longer bottle their rage at this fact up, so riots rip through the city.

Walking dadbod doesn’t know what to do so he sits inside with his girls and cries by their side. Days go by and still, nobody assumes the role of leader to help the family out of this situation. They live in the city, the streets aren’t safe, the stores are closed, and it’s going to be another few days before it’s safe to leave their property. The family suffers, everyone is emotionally drained, and lack of preparation devastates the family.

  • Dadbod comes home to find his wife fucking another man. He is a poor boy who makes minimum wage, yet he is shredded and confident as fuck. Wife says, “What? I needed a real man and you haven’t fucked me in months.” Of course beta zombie husband has wanted to fuck her hard, but it never came to fruition as he was a nice guy and nice zombie men don’t force sex.

Now he tells her he will take her back and he is sorry for not being the man she needed (See: Cuck).

  • Walking Dad shuffles his soft fat ass into the Dr’s office where the family Dr. tells him that his heart is starting to fail and if he doesn’t take immediate action he is going to die before he’s 55.
  • Zombie man has to watch his kids play in the ocean while he wears a shirt, has to watch his family zip line while he hands out below, too heavy for the wires, and has to sit on the sideline while the rest of his family has amazing experiences because he lacks conditioning, strength, and is too heavy to go on any ride.

I could keep going, but I’ll stop because it fucking sucks to write this. This is the reality many men are facing and it’s fucking depressing. Too many men are nothing more than walking wallets to their wife and kids.

It’s time to make a change; gentlemen it’s time to take back what has been stripped of you – your fucking balls and masculinity.

Draw a line in the sand, today.

Fuck that, right now draw a line in the sand and say, “It ends here”

Who do you think you should be? Who do you think your wife wants?

Who do you think you should be? Who do you think your wife wants?

Start by refusing to reward failure, do not allow others to disrespect you or your opinion on certain matters – Make your voice heard.

From there, earn the loyalty and respect that is taken by masculine men. Get control over your nutrition, grow some muscles and strength by getting your ass under the iron. Start running and doing bodyweight exercises. Then add in some reading; remember, mental fitness is as important as physical so make time to train your mind while you’re training your body.

Unfuck your sex life; your wife is a woman and needs you to be a god damn man – step up. Sure, it sucks that you’ve been a doormat for the past X amount of years, but those years are gone so reclaim your role in this family in the here and now.

Would you fuck you? No? Then why do you think your wife should?

Would you fuck you? No? Then why do you think your wife should?

If you’ve made it this far then you are now presented with a choice. You can choose to reclaim your masculinity and live life as a real man or you can join the growing population of the Walking Dad – choose wisely; if you aren’t with masculine men, then you’re against them.

-Hunter

If you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

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Are You Prepared?

I recently read this post on Reddit and it reminded me of how unprepared a majority of my friends and family are in the event of a disaster.

This is quite disheartening as when you look over the current affairs in the United States – it looks like shit is likely to go down eventually. There is no excuse for being unprepared as I am telling you right now – again – shit is eventually going to hit the fan.

Whether that means there is rioting in your city, a major hurricane, getting stranded on the highway in a snowstorm, something is going to happen and as a man and the leader of your family, you are expected to get everyone through the suffering with as little physical and mental damage as possible.

Masculine Men (Leaders) Know What to Do – Even when They Don’t

If you read the linked post you’ll notice that the dude took all of the brunt work on himself – yet he expected and clearly articulated to his family what their roles were (and yes they all had a job to do, none of this women & children being exempt from labor).

He walked the neighborhood, scoping out the highest ground in the event of flooding, and did some recon to find any exit pathways (unfortunately they were flooded). My point is this – he had already planned this in his mind. At some point during his commutes, his workdays, his weight lifting sessions – this dude thought of what he would do if shit hit the fan.

You need to be prepared and in order to be prepared you need to run through mental exercises where you envision something bad happening and how you’ll respond.

If you’re a dad I’m sure you’ve watched your kid walk along a rock wall or some other ledge balancing as they go. In your mind you’ve already mapped out where you’ll step, which hand you’ll use, and where you’ll grab if the kid were to fall. This is where ‘Dad Reflexes’ come from, Fathers are in tune with their surroundings and specifically with what their family members are doing. You’ve pictured your kid falling from that wall 400xs so when it happens, boom you seem like you’ve got some premonition and were able to get there as soon as it happened.

Implement this same ‘Dad Reflex’ on a much more broad and serious scale.

Do you have a medical kit in your car? What about your home?

Do you have flashlights, candles, batteries, lamps, food, or a fire extinguisher in your home?

I could go on for pages with lists, gear, and reasons behind each – but that is not the point of this post. If you’d like a list of items, look at any of the ‘prepper’ sites that are out there. It doesn’t matter whether these people are worried about an EMP, Tornado, or some other nuclear fallout. Take the information that is applicable to you, look at the gear they have chosen to include, and find out why. Then look at yourself and ask the question, am I prepared?

In my Jeep I have a first aid kit, flashlight, knife, and a few other car essentials. If I drive by a car accident, I can help. If I’m at the playground and my kid eats shit jumping off the slide, I can help, if I have to batten down the hatches because of a storm and someone gets hurt, we’re good – I’m prepared.

You need to be confident in saying the same. Take a look at your house. Do your wife and kids know where the fire extinguisher is? Do they know where your water reserve is? Do you even have a reserve of water in case you lose power/water? What about lanterns or flashlights?

Disasters are similar to family vacations: The difference between a stress free vacation and a getaway that sucks is planning. You have to plan for the kids, plan for the wife, and never have that what do we do now moment – because that’s where the tears, arguments, and rage sets in.

The same goes for disasters.

If you have a nasty hurricane headed your way, you can greatly reduce the stress you and the rest of your family experiences by being prepared and planning. If you lose power for 4 days and are stuck in your house you’ll need entertainment, food, water, hygiene, etc. Have a plan and fill your role as the man.

If you don’t and you reach that what do we do now? moment – stand the fuck by. Your kids will be annoying the shit out of you, your wife will be launching nuclear shit tests, your mind will get fried, and ultimately, when all is said and done – you will look like a man who cannot fend for his family and this is a stigma you may carry forever.

You’ll be at cookouts and your wife will talk about how you didn’t know what to do and how terrible the whole experience was, she’ll know that her man isn’t dependable and will compare you to others. This will lead to future fights because as a man your pride will be hurt when she says, I bet Hunter Drew was prepared and didn’t have to go x days without food

If another storm is headed your way your wife won’t support you or trust your leadership as you failed in the past. Again, more fights as you’ll tell her this time will be different – blah blah blah

You are measured on your actions and there will only be a few times in your life where you can show your leadership and emergency response traits. If you miss that window, whenever you watch a movie and the main man is leading the way – your wife will think of how her man couldn’t do that.

So plan ahead and be ready for the time that your number is called and you are forced to step into the arena.

Our society is plagued with this notion that someone else will fix their problems and take care of them; Believe me, you will have to step into that arena and when you do so, you’ll be alone. There my be a time where nobody comes to help you, are you ready for that?

Now, lets shift gears and picture what happens if/when you do have a plan.

You give your instructions on what you need her to get done (Gives her a chance to make you proud)

You give your kids their orders (makes them feel involved and a part of ‘saving the day’)

You look at all possible outcomes/ways to reduce the negative impact on the family – then act.

You’ll have games and ways to pass the time so kids are calm, maybe afraid, but still calm and aware that they need to maintain a standard of relaxation and silence.

Your family will have food, light, and most importantly confidence that it’s all going to be ok – they’ll find comfort in the discomfort and view it as an adventure vice being terrified.

Your wife will see that you’ve got it under control and that she can relax and release her feminine side as she isn’t forced to lead – her man’s got it. This will allow her to ease enough to go back to tending her duties an not feel she has to look over your’s.

You’ll be alert, tired, and fucking smiling as you know you’re prepared and ready to handle whatever it is that’s thrown your way.

You’ll come out of it as a tighter unit and your actions will show your wife and kids that when push comes to shove, their man rises to the occasion. Your wife will talk about how you saved the day and took charge; your kids will talk about how they helped and how awesome it was, etc.

The difference between being a hero and being a zero is having a plan.

Hunter
I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

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Modern Day Agoge: A man’s path to raising a masculine son in a feminized society

I’ve always been a fan of historical warriors – then the movie 300 came out and it planted the seed in my mind that someday I would have to raise the next warrior.

The movie came out in 2006. I had just graduated boot camp, and I felt like I could single handedly take on the world. I had finished my Rite of Passage into manhood and was now on my own, in the best shape of my life, and fucking motivated as all hell. I was radiating limitless energy & confidence; basically I was like every other masculine 19 year old that just entered the military.

I distinctly remember watching the movie in A school and discussing with a friend the scene where the boys enter Agoge. I told them that at the age of 7, my son would begin his Rite of Passage.

*Fast Forward 3 years*

The little man turned 7 last week and it has begun.

Color Code it to make it easy

Color Code it to make it easy

Above you’ll see a calendar. That calendar is color coordinated (with some help from his 4yo sister) to show what days we are training each topics.

I do not homeschool my kid, yet I educate him enough that it may as well be considered homeschooling.

I feel that as a parent it is your responsibility to foster the mental and physical growth of your child, because it is your child. Teachers are on a budget, limited to a certain amount of time/curriculum, and they teach a class that is geared towards the female student population.

Nobody is going to invest more time or energy into my kids than me. While the teacher educates them on how to pass a test, I will educate them on how to learn, how to improve their thinking, and educate them on topics that will help with life and not just a test.

Because of this I have broken down his education to:

Philosophy

Teaching him to actually think and not just memorize. To question the fundamentals of life and get to the why he is doing what he does.

Boys need to expand their mind, have those deep discussions and ponderings. I used to think that philosophers were pussies who stayed in the city while real warriors went out to fight. This shitty preconceived notion came from the fact that my dad never taught me a thing about philosophy or the badass philosophers whose were were written down and passed on through the ages.

I missed out on Socrates, Aristotle, Plato, Seneca, Descartes, Locke, and Epictetus plus many more until I was 28 – my son will not have to wait so long.

Art

Getting the boyo to appreciate the beauty of reading, writing, painting, woodworking, cooking, etc. My wife will be involved with this as she has a very artistic personality. The kid needs to recognize that he does not have to rely on ‘mommy’ to make him a fancy meal as he ages.

He will not rely on getting a girlfriend in order to eat a quality meal at home. Too few men are capable in the kitchen. My wife loves to cook and does it 90% of them time, but we both know that if I wanted to, I could also cook my ass off.

Even if it is as simple as watching some YouTube videos on how Da Vinci was both artist as well as inventor and showing him that the arts can be as masculine endeavor as the rest of them.

Health & Fitness

Teaching him the importance of balancing out a strong mind with a strong body. Focusing on how to eliminate the clutter that gets into our thoughts and the processed ‘excess’ in our foods. Plus, a healthy serving of kettlebells.

He will have to do some heavy lifting with me and learn to appreciate the food he is putting in his body as it is fuel for performance. He will eat to live and not live to eat. More importantly he will know why and how he can achieve this.

Writing

I love to write and feel it is an important aspect of life. Being able to look at where you were at that point in your life, to look inside the head of your ancestors and complete strangers. There is something beautiful about looking at black squiggly lines, possibly written by someone who is long dead, and actually having them give you a physical feeling, it’s like the soul of the author reached up and touched you.

Outdoors

I just finished a 4 day excursion on the Appalachian Trail, I loved the feeling of being surrounded by the silence of nature. Of not having the comforts of modern living and having confidence in your ability to survive if you are ripped from the elements of modern day amenities.

Hiking, climbing, plants, animals, camping, etc. It will get him to appreciate the nice things we have and more importantly he’ll learn to find comfort in the discomfort. He’ll find meaning in being cold & wet as well as learning how to get warm and dry to stay alive.

Science

He added this one to the mix (the pink boxes) because he said that he would like to conduct science experiments. I was pumped as I have now found a reason to blow things up, make volcanoes, and do all sorts of other cool shit with him.

These topics will be discussed at length and different aspects will be discussed throughout the months. I’m sure the message will change as he grows and the topics will become increasingly more complex – but the point remains that this is geared towards life improvement and life understanding.

The daily topics are only a portion of his training. He will also receive more chores as well as more freedom. I will expect him to exert himself physically in all of his sports endeavors (football/baseball), which he participates in by choice and when things don’t go the way he wants, I’ll sit down and break it down with him.

I will introduce him to firearms, archery, other weaponry as well as physical combat.

I’ve started asking him more why questions. Why are you doing it like that? Why do you think that person said this? etc.

I want him to start observing and understanding the actions and motivators of others. I want him to see why people think the way they do and how he can influence them to get what he needs as well as placing himself in positions to succeed. I want him to learn to be both genuine as well as manipulative.

I don’t have a ‘no throwing the ball in the house’ rule and I am always there to wrestle with him. When his friends sleep over, they wrestle and fight and cry then fight again the entire time. I don’t shut it down, I let them be boys. Someone needs to foster that natural masculine power and I have no problem doing so in my home. Let them throw down, so long as they aren’t breaking bones and bleeding all over the place, who cares?

It’s good for them – violence, competition, aggression, sport, etc. I allow all of it and only step it when things get out of control or safety becomes an issue.

Every day him and I will step away from the wife and daughter/sister and have a man discussion. It is more of a facilitated talk by me, but there are days where something is really on his mind and he will go to town asking question after question.

He was really hung up on the discussion of Stoicism vs Epicureanism. The kid is 7 and wants to know why we would not let bad things bother us. It was very interesting and in my explanation, I learned a little about myself and felt like Epictetus as I was saying, those things aren’t bad as long as we don’t interpret them as being bad.

This is my way of fighting off the influence public school is going to have on his mind. Again, I’m sure the program will evolve over time, but the core pillars will remain and it is in this aspect I think all parents should pay attention. Why is it weird to have your kid write a book report for you, to solve problems, to run experiments? That should be the norm, yet many parents reading this fall into the ‘screen time’ category. Plugging a child in front of a screen after hours of numbing school will kill any genuine aspect of their raw ‘self’. They’ll become yet another desensitized, weak male in our society suffering from intense levels of self repression and self hate.

There are aspects of life that are not covered in public or private school – it is your responsibility to fill in those gaps and help your son remain a masculine warrior. One who does not need the manosphere or anything like it as he will simply live a genuine life to the grave.

This is how we get boys to express their masculinity vice repressing it. This is how fathers can help fight back.

Hunter
I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

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Read to/with/and in front of your kids.

I have been tracking my reading since 2013 as I thought it would be pretty cool for me to provide a list to my kids when they got a little older, allowing them to see the mental adventures their old man went on throughout his life. My wife, while she does not track her reading – actually reads more than I do. We differ on preference of medium as she loves her kindle and I am more of a physical books kind of guy. Regardless of what you read from, the fact remains that while I speak to married men, this (reading to your kids) isn’t only for the father to do. I believe my wife and I do it the best as we both read with and to our kids as well as ensuring they see us reading.

My Reading list: 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016 (present)

It has been brought to my attention that while I have been promoting reading and setting positive examples for your children, I’ve yet to touch on the subject of the importance of not only reading in front of them, but also reading to them and with them. Interacting with them in a manner where reading is the sole connection & focus.

I have found that establishing routines, rituals, traditions, and standards in your family is of the greatest importance. Reading to your kids is an opportunity for you to facilitate their mental growth in a way that nothing else could ever compare. Whether it is the routine of reading before bed, the tradition of reading A Christmas Carol every December, or the ritual of where everyone sits – getting the drinks prepped – and gathering around whomever is telling the story that night. These memories last a lifetime and the foundation from which you build your family is strengthened when you can bring the tradition, rituals, and routines together with one action – reading.

You don’t know me, you know who I show – but you don’t know the everyday real me. I will let you in on a piece of my private nature – I am not a complainer and I cannot tolerate those who are. Instead of talking about a problem or bitching that there is a problem –why not work towards a solution to the issue? Masculine men don’t bitch that their faucet is leaking, yard is fucked up, or kids don’t listen – they fix the fucking issue and move forward.

One of the biggest complaints I hear about children is that they are all about instant gratification, that their faces are always plugged into electronics, and that they do not appreciate the hard work and discipline that was needed back in the day. Guess what PARENT your kid’s issues are direct results of your failure to properly lead them. Every single problem you find in your child should be viewed as a mirror as it is your failure. So, lets find an answer to the issues, let’s bring about a resolution to your gripes.

Reading is the solution to a majority of your problems

Reading TO them

One way to ensure that your children are set up for success, appreciate a sturdy family life, and have the values you find to be of importance is for you to be an influential part of their ‘growing’ and development of self. Reading is an aspect of this that I find will go deeper and last longer in your child’s memory than any other activity. Maybe it is the romanticized aspect of Daddy reading to me before bed or maybe it is the ‘adventures’ we went on together. Whatever it is, my kids have made it clear whenever I take too long to grab a book that they expect my ass ready to read and aren’t going to hear any excuse as to why I bailed on them.

I have read MANY books to my kids. The ones that stand out are the ones where we all really get into it. Reading The Hobbit, Tolkien’s Beowulf, Alice in Wonderland, and (currently) Harry Potter have me and the kids turning the pages on the edge of our seats wondering what will happen next. Singing the Songs of the Dwarves, doing the accents and voices in Alice in Wonderland, and painting the picture in Harry Potter are things that my kids will never forget. Daddy being there, breaking it down, showing the pictures, explaining the advanced concepts, discussing the chapter after reading it, allowing them to stay up late so we can finish the chapter (sometimes more for me than them) – all of it strengthens an aspect of our relationship that cannot be duplicated elsewhere.

Reading WITH them

My son reads short stories to me every day. His school has him take a book home every day and the family will sit down together (sometimes his sister takes off to play with her dolls) and he will read to us. After he reads the book I ask him what he thought about it, what his favorite part was, and then I will ask him a question like: What was the boy’s name? What was the color of the truck? Why did the dog run into the house? I do this in an effort to test his reading comprehension. He loves reading to us, it makes him proud and having him read in front of people helps to develop both his self-confidence as well as self-efficacy. Not only does he know he can read to us, he knows that when he does read he comprehends what it is he is putting out there.

Now to shift gears and focus the spotlight on you. Answer these honestly: How many nights have you put your kid to bed without reading to them? How many nights did you choose watching Netflix or drinking over sharing that moment with your child? Why do you think your child doesn’t appreciate reading or doesn’t have the ability to sit still and remain focused for longer than 3 minutes? My kids are 3 and 6, don’t play the age card. It’s your fucking fault – you are placing your own selfish priorities over the development of your offspring and they are suffering for it, destined to be a part of the growing population of weaksauce fucking kids.

We only have so many breathes in this life, only so many opportunities to have a Polaroid (memory) hung up on the string that is our life.

Do you imagine your child reading to their kid when they get older? Do you imagine them sitting with a kid on their lap telling stories? Do you entertain all of those other ‘cliché’ romantic moments? If you do and you don’t read to your kids, then it’s not going to fucking happen.

Earlier today I read a solid quote from a user on the Married Red Pill subreddit and I wanted to share it here:

/u/tim_rp said, “I’m of the opinion reading to your kids is the single best thing you can do for them. Books are the one thing we have no qualms purchasing in our household and we have hundreds.

It’s just insane how beneficial it is:

  • Adds something fun to the daily routine.
  • Creates together time with very little effort. But cosy, special one-to-one (or one-to-two in my case) time.
  • Sows the seeds of later literacy. Not just reading but things like vocal inflection and character/plot development.
  • Start early enough and you put them on the front foot when they start school, because they’ll instinctually understand what it means to interpret words on a page.
  • Lets kids play out reality and experience the wider world (and fantasy worlds) from the safety of their own home.
  • Gives them a platform to develop and explore their own interests.
  • Calms them the hell down before bedtime.

I read to both my kids since day one and now my six year old now reads to me!”

I could not agree more with his stance on the subject and again, if you don’t read to your kids then you are robbing them from a lifetime of personal and professional growth.

Read IN FRONT of them

Kids will follow your example over your advice. The most important action to take if you want your kids to read, is to do so yourself. Skip watching the football game, skip watching Family Guy or Bob’s Burgers – save that for when they are in bed. When it is raining out, don’t have them playing video games – instead of the external stimulation have them utilize some internal imagination to create a world of enjoyment.

When the sun is out, my family is out. The wife runs around with them, I play ball with my son or chase my daughter, we do whatever. If it is raining, then my wife and I will do some projects or whatever the house needs and we will also sit in our living room and read. She will read on the kindle (sometimes a physical book) and I will read on my chair with a book (sometimes the kindle). The kids play with their toys, but more often than not they will come into the room and grab a book and either weasel their way between myself and my book asking me to read theirs with them or they will lay on the floor and read or look at the pictures themselves. They enjoy being wherever we are and while we don’t force them to read with us, it is expected that they will do something productive and not whine about not being able to go outside.

My kids see me lift, so they ‘lift’ (foam barbell/15lb kettlebells, pushups/body squats, etc.) they see me read – so they read. Books get you to strengthen your mind – reading is Mental Fitness. Provide your child with that mental strength and fortitude. Teach them the amazing power of the written word. Explain to them how interesting it is that a bunch of black squiggly lines on a dead tree written by possibly a dead man can paint a picture in their mind.

Remember, “A person who won’t read has no advantage over the one who can’t.”
Hunter
I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

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Don’t Live Life Vicariously

This is your life and you need to understand that it is all there is for you. You don’t get today back, you don’t get 5 minutes ago back, it has passed and it will never come again. Every single thing you want to do has to be done in the window you’re given. If you want to have a six pack and get the admiration that is given to the good looking, then you need to make the time to prep meals, hit the weights, and get out in the public to display your art.

You don't have all the time in the world, you have NOW. Stop daydreaming and actually DO.

You don’t have all the time in the world, you have NOW. Stop daydreaming and actually DO.

Do you want to write a book or get your degree?

Then get started! The time is going to pass either way so you might as well do something productive that brings you closer to those goals during the passing seconds.

I was originally going to write a parenting post bringing attention to dads who are looking to ‘do it again’ via their sons. I decided against this as while those dads who want to live through their sons are completely weaksauce, the guys who live through their friends are as equally deplorable.

  • Fathers with Regret
  • Envy
  • Freedom
  • Bonus Question
  • Father & Son NOT Father IS Son

I coach my son’s flag football team. This has exposed me to many instances where fathers, who are totally out of shape, are pressuring (sometimes physically) their son to do better, hit harder, suck it up, and stop whining. These weak fucks rocking the Dadbod are trying to relive their own ‘glory days’ through their kids. Not only are they pathetic losers for choosing to take this path of parenting, but they are preventing the kid from forming their own identity. Every choice these boys ever make is going to cause internal struggle as they won’t know if they are making the decision because they themselves want to, or if they are choosing something because it will make dad proud and would be the choice dad would make.

Gentlemen, listen up – if you have a son, allow your son to grow into his own man. Lead him, foster a masculine environment, train him in discipline, work ethic, and teach him the reality of the world – but for fucks sake – do not try to be him and live his life.

My hero is the Men out there who are living an unapologetically Masculine life/

My hero is the Men out there who are living an unapologetically Masculine life/

I’m lucky in the sense that my boyo is all that is man. The kid loves sports, math, America, and all things boy. But, if he were to come up to me and say he wanted to join dance, I would support the fuck out of that too. I wouldn’t call him a pussy, because I am not living through him. My job is to raise him, not make him who I think I would be if I were to do it (life) again.

I would be the most badass father with signs, face paint, and air horns for my son the ballerina.

A Dad and his Daughter

I also have a daughter, and she is the girliest most feminine thing in this world. As I am typing this post up, she is jumping over my dog’s tail with her bedazzled purse over her arm and a huge bow in her hair (she cuts to my core).

I fucking hate how so many fathers I know say shit like, “When she goes on her first date I’ll be waiting – cleaning my shotgun when she gets home…”

Awesome dude, you’re going to scare off a 12 year old boy? That’s masculine as fuck, I’m sure that will make your daughter think, ‘Gee, my dad sure is great’. In reality, it will do the opposite and just the fact that you feel the need to play the role of ‘tough guy dad’ means you truly aren’t a tough dude.

Not only this, but you want to foster a relationship with your daughter where she feels that she can talk to you about anything. I don’t want to think of some boy with my little girl, but its life and the reality is, I’m going to have to cross that bridge someday. I would much rather my girl feeling comfortable discussing it with me and asking the questions than having her sneak behind my back. If you’re a weaksauce father and talk about how you’ll ‘scare the boys away’ then your little lady is going to ensure you never even know those boys exist.

Do yourself a favor, let your son live his own life and ensure your daughter knows that she can share anything with you.

Envy

If you are a single masculine man and you have friends who are married or in long term relationships, then you’ve probably heard the pitiful phrase that runs along the lines of, “Man, you’re so lucky, if I wasn’t married I would do x, y, z…don’t ever get married”.

These guys, they envy you, the want what you have, they think, ‘If only I were single…’ which almost directly translates to, ‘my lack of achievement & contentment with life is directly linked to my decision to start a family’. What you probably know and they are afraid to admit, is that their mediocre performance is not due to their family, it is due to their lack of work ethic, discipline, and inability to embrace their true masculine nature.

I loathe these men more than any other group. I have a special hatred for weak husbands and weak fathers because they are a part of my demographic and they are the reason people think I should be weak, fat, and content with what I’ve got. All in all, they are the reason marriage and fathers have such a shitty stereotype (one I’m trying to break). These fucking assholes are using their family as an excuse for poor performance, they talk of their wives and children as if they are anchors when in reality they should be fuel.

You can stare into the abyss forever, thinking of all the things you 'could' do OR, you could choose to actually do those things.

You can stare into the abyss forever, thinking of all the things you ‘could’ do OR, you could choose to actually do those things.

If you are married or in an LTR – do not envy your single friends, instead – raise your own personal standard. You chose to start a family, even if you did so in the BP mindset, you made a life decision. Lead your family to the level you want them at, maintain the highest standard for yourself, and stop being so fucking comfortable and complacent.

You cannot live through your single friends. Stop admiring their achievements and adventures and go out and make your own. Make it a journey with your family. Single friends can’t bring their family to see the beauty of nature, they can’t lead children to overcome adversity or grow as individuals, they are single, and they don’t have offspring whom they can nurture and watch grow.

The past is gone, whether you wanted to travel more or do this or that, it makes no difference. You are here and you are in the now. I appreciate you spending your ‘now’ reading The Family Alpha but I need you to go out and do the things you want to do. Travel with the kids and wife, or set yourself up so that when they are older you can do what you want then. But still, immerse yourself in the now and don’t ever let the thought ‘if only I were still single’ go through your mind ever again.

Carpe Fucking Diem

You’re Freedom Lays within You

 You cannot live through others, whether it be your kids or your friends. You have your life and only your life – maximize it. Find a way to love who you are, where you’re at, and what it is you do. Even if you want to grow or improve, still find a way to love the point you’ve reached thus far.

To quote Jocko Willink, ‘Discipline Equals Freedom’ discipline yourself enough to place what you have to do over pretending it doesn’t need to get done. You have to workout to get the body you want and the body your wife wants you to have. You have to apply yourself to actually DOING and not just TALKNG about whatever goals you’ve set. You have to accept that you are where you are, trying to live through your kid or friends is not you actually living, so choose to live your own life. If you haven’t put in the work then you don’t deserve the glory, every man I know thinks they have what it takes to reach the highest level of living, but very few actually have the balls to grind all the way from beginning to completion of a goal, you have t finish whatever it is you start.

You'll reach the height you work for and the life you earn. Want to climb higher? Then work harder and raise the standard of self as well as that of those around you.

You’ll reach the height you work for and the life you earn. Want to climb higher? Then work harder and raise the standard of self as well as that of those around you.

In closing, you have to find comfort in the discomfort of living life as a masculine male in a weaksauce society. Nobody can do it for you and you can’t do it through anyone else, live your life – own your shit.

Hunter Drew

**Unrelated Side Question**

Does embracing masculinity apply when dealing with homosexuals? Do we have any gay individuals amongst The Manosphere ranks that can answer this? Maybe a lesbian who is the ‘man’ in the relationship, or a gay dude who has to deal with his ‘feminine’ partner.

I deal a lot with heterosexual individuals, I’ve never dealt with gay marriage, why is that?

These things have crossed my mind a few times and I don’t want to write an entire post just to ask this question. I bring it up for people to either private message me so we can discuss or to comment below so we can talk about how, if at all, it works and what the differences of application may be.
Hunter
I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

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What’s Expected of the Masculine Man?

Some guys come to The Manosphere much like those who come to their New Year’s resolutions. They are pumped, motivated, and ready to go – then when they realize what is required of them, they quit. The idea of rocking a six pack, writing a book, or being in charge of your life is awesome, the application… it’s not quite as glamorous.

But then again, what did they expect?

People don’t accidentally become fitness models, body builders, or professional football players. Have you read the stories of the most famous and affluent authors? They didn’t just come across their breakout book, it wasn’t given to them. The same can be said of that guy with sub 10% body fat and the Dad who has a few kids, a wife, and he is still fucking on the daily.

Nothing like that just happens to a man. Big results come from making big decisions, exercising some major self-discipline, and refusing to accept mediocrity by breaking the out of the mold that your friends and family are trying to keep you in.

So to answer the question of, What’s Expected of the Masculine Man we need to look at what makes a man, a Man.

The time for you to reclaim your masculinity from the grip of those pushing the female imperative is NOW

The time for you to reclaim your masculinity from the grip of those pushing the female imperative is NOW

Leadership

Men lead, it’s the way it is, the way it was, and (hopefully) the way it will continue to be. I learned to lead while serving in the Navy and it has become a personal obsession of mine. I’ve read the books, held the deep drunken discussions with some living war heroes, and researched the psychology and theory behind what makes a ‘good’ leader. A lot of guys will look at this and scoff, saying that leaders are all about the glory, attention, and control. To a degree, they are correct; what I’m telling you is that masculine Men lead, the guys who laugh at the leader are the same guys who are watching others take charge, take initiative, and provide direction to a group of individuals.

Leadership applies to work, relationships, and family.

Leadership & Work

            All of the Men (capitalized to differentiate between Masculine and UNmasculine ‘men’) I had the pleasure to serve with, or work with since leaving the service exhibited the same behavioral trait: They all were trying to take the job of the person above them. They did not undermine the boss, nor did they play ‘politics’ to sneak their way in. No, what they did was aim to outperform the boss. They would do their job better than their peers, then they would insert themselves into the meetings, they would pick their bosses brain on how to do the ‘boss’s job’ and they would grind day and night until when the position became available the company had no other choice but to pick them as it was clear nobody could do that job better than the person who’d been gunning for it for however long.

The reason I brought that quick example up is because it sets up the role of leadership and the attributes of masculine men at work. The guys who excel often do so by making the people around them better, yet remaining the ‘best’. The do not push others down and stand on their shoulders to rise above, no – these guys raise everyone and follow the mantra of Iron sharpens Iron. These guys help educate, train, and assist their peers. While doing so they continually improve themselves and their own abilities.

A quick anecdote from the Navy: While guys slept I would stay up and get qualifications, while they played Halo I would read technical manuals, when they left early I would consistently volunteer to stay later to fix whatever needed to be fixed. I didn’t do this for any other reason than it needed to be done. When guys went home I didn’t get upset, I just viewed them to be weaker than I was, unwilling to put the mission ahead of their immediate pleasures. This resulted in me advancing faster, assuming positions usually held for higher ranking individuals, and being given the opportunity to pursue other goals as I had already achieved the ones everyone else was currently working on. I had asked guys to stay late, to stay awake, and to work instead of play. It wasn’t until I had blown them out of the water in both rank and position that they took notice and then it was a game of ‘catch up’ but I was too far ahead and never relaxed.

Leadership & Relationships

            Leadership applies to any relationship whether it be family or a love interest. The onus is on you, as a masculine man, to assume the role you were biologically programmed to fill. For thousands of years it was the Men who hunted, brought home food, decided where to live, and protected their clan. The guys who did this well lived to pass on their seed, the other guys, they died. You are the result of some bad ass mother fuckers who decided to fight, lead, and live. Now, it’s your turn.

Your woman needs you to assume the role of The Family Alpha. She doesn’t want to hear that “you don’t know what you want to eat” or that “you don’t care” what you plan to do this weekend. She wants a Man who can make that decision. If she is asking you something, she wants you to be able to provide the answer for her. She needs to know that you can make life your bitch and that you give enough of a shit to take her where you want to go and more importantly that you have some sort of vision as to where you actually want to go and do with your life.

My wife turns to me asking questions about the kids, finances, jobs, etc. all things that come up in life, my wife is turning to me for guidance. She is my submissive woman and I am her dominant (not domineering) Man. The same can be said for your LTR, girlfriend, or plate. You have to be the man who exudes limitless self-confidence and can make leadership decisions in the short and long term. You cannot blame the failure of those you lead on anyone but yourself, their failure is the result of your poor leadership abilities.

Power

Masculine Men feel powerful emotions and they are expected to harness those powerful emotions and channel them towards productive outlets. Whether it is weight lifting, running, writing, whatever… you are a man and you need to control your masculine powerhouse of emotions.

As masculine Men we are the more romantic of the sexes. Mainstream media, feminists, and the female imperative will argue this, but is undoubtedly true. It’s one of the biggest misconceptions out there and unfortunately, many men are repressing their true nature in order to fit into what they’ve been told they should be (weaklings).

I say Fuck. That.

If you feel a certain way, then share that. If you feel as though something isn’t right bring it up. If you have this tight feeling in your chest when your wife berates you, stand up for yourself. When someone says you shouldn’t be competitive, confrontational, or so direct laugh in their face. Stop repressing your powerful feelings and start expressing them.

            I’m not saying, ‘share your feelings’ in the same manner everyone else is, I am saying it as a masculine man. What I mean is stop fucking saying you don’t care where you eat when you do, stop saying you are fine with sex once a month when you’re not, and stop rolling over and accepting mediocrity when you know you can achieve so much more. That is what is expected of the masculine man and that is what he does, he controls the emotions and uses them for improvement. Don’t be afraid to upset your wife, by playing along and not making waves you are being a sneaky weak bitch. Playing ‘nice guy’ thinking it will get you that elusive blowjob is weak as fuck. Your wife isn’t attracted to the ‘nice guy’ she is attracted to the masculine Man who shows his true colors and he owns them.

Owning his shit

            You cannot reclaim or maintain your masculinity until you accept that you may not be doing your best or giving it your all. Are you really trying your hardest at work, your hobby, or leading your family. It is not until you see reality for what it truly is that you can begin the process of OWNING your position and life.

You must find comfort in the discomfort of living life as  Masculine Man in a weaksauce society

You must find comfort in the discomfort of living life as  Masculine Man in a weaksauce society

All of the failures you have experienced up to this point are your fault. All of the successes and high points, they are also because of you. Too often guys rationalize away their mediocre and weaksauce performance. If your wife isn’t fucking you, it’s because you are nasty. You’re probably overweight, annoying, immature, ugly, lack any coothe, or all of the above. A woman will have sex with and not nag a Masculine dude who owns his shit.

You are bypassed at work for promotions and advancement? You are mistreated by friends and family? You didn’t have a dad? Came from a poor family? BlahFuckingBlah

You have to Own It. The only masculine decision you have is to take all of that shit, ball it up, and absorb every bit of it into who you are. Yes you’re poor, fat, and weak, whatever. You need to own it and work on fixing it. You cannot change anything up to this exact point in time, but you can change what you do the moment you finish reading this post. You can close the computer, put the phone away, or turn off the tablet and find a pen and paper, write down your failures, then you can write three ways you are going to Own It.

You have a choice coming up in the next few minutes. Are you weak or are you strong?

Refusing to accept mediocrity

Masculine Men do not reward failure. If someone is not pulling their weight and bringing value into your life, then it is on you to remove them. If this is your wife, then you need to lead her to improvement or if she refuses, you need to make the decision to cut it off. The same goes for friends, family, acquaintances, everyone. If anyone in my life is not reaching the standard I have set for myself and others, then I will attempt to ‘fix’ them or guide them to a lifestyle or person who can help them. If they refuse to improve and are content with their mediocre existence, then I just cut the cord. I would rather have 3 friends who are badass mother fuckers that make me try harder in my own life than having 300 friends who are fucking weaksauce slugs.

There is no need to keep the fucking fucks who leach off you in your life. Someone failed to live up to your standard, you counseled them, and they did it again. If you choose to accept it, then you are rewarding their failure with your time and attention. Remember, as a masculine man your assets are Time & Attention. Give it to those who deserve it and remember you need to find the Lions and run with them, cut out the weak and helpless it’s not your job to play hero and save someone who is unwilling to save themselves.

Take The Red Pill, embrace reality, and reclaim your masculinity.

Take The Red Pill, embrace reality, and reclaim your masculinity.

You Walk Alone

Walking this path will put you into conflict with many of your friends and family. When you start to think that it is the wrong path, I want you to remember this.

If you’re doing something to improve your life and your friends are challenging & shaming you, do they really want what’s best for you? Or, as is more likely, do they want what is best for themselves and what is best for themselves is you staying in your little cookie cut mold they’ve made for you, keeping you from forcing them to face their own mediocre existence.

You walk this path alone and you own it. Don’t expect support, you must do it on your own it’s a part of the process. Now, do you want the most from life or do you want to keep those around you comfortable, at the expense of being who you were born to be?

            I’ll finish this post with a quote from my post The Alpha Walks Alone

As men we need to be comfortable and find enjoyment in being outnumbered, outgunned, and not really fitting in with everyone else. You see, it isn’t meeting others expectations or fitting the mold of another person that makes you a Man. Being a Man means you are walking your own path – alone. You need to be comfortable with this fact; it’s a part of dissolving the Red Pill.”

Of the millions of words I’ve written for the Red Pill forums, there are 3 that are used most often: Acta, Non Verba

As a Masculine Man you will be judged on what it is you do, not what you say.

  • Hunter
  • I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

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‘PC’ Parenting is Straight Garbage

This post has been in the works for a few weeks now. The reason for this lengthy ‘write time’ is I wasn’t exactly sure how I would be able to cover the concept of ‘Politically Correct’ parenting without breaking it into a ‘series’ of sorts. I’m not a fan of series, I write about a certain topic or topics a day, then I am off to ponder another aspect of masculinity. To write at length for multiple days on a single topic just isn’t my style. So, I had to find a way to take all of what PC parenting is and strip it down to my specific gripes and what I think parents should be doing in regards to rearing their children. I am not going to tell you how to raise your child, as a father of two I am doing my best and giving my all, but I don’t know if my way is the ‘right’ way, I just know it’s the best way I believe they should be raised. With that said, there may not be a ‘right’ way, but there definitely is a wrong way. Raising your children under the notion that they should be groomed for blending in with society, not making waves, and tolerating everything – thus believing in nothing is not how kids should be raised.

our children are your flesh and blood, not a billboard for you to promote your personal agenda.

our children are your flesh and blood, not a billboard for you to promote your personal agenda.

I have a 6 year old boy and 3 year old girl, so that is where I am coming from. For those who are ready to blast me for even suggesting parents could be doing it wrong, fire away – you’re retarded if you think there isn’t something wrong with raising a kid ‘gender neutral’.

I have had people tell me that I should enroll my daughter in football and baseball to keep her ‘well rounded’, I’m sure these people will also be sending me space camp, math prodigy, and science summer camp pamphlets for her as she gets older.  My daughter loves glitter, her dolls, and all things make-up, purse, and jewelry. She is enrolled in dance/ballet and loves her tutu. Why is that a fucking problem?

Let your girl express her feminine beauty, allow her to embrace who she is.

Let your girl express her feminine beauty, allow her to embrace who she is.

Some feminists and ‘Pro Gender-Neutral’ parents have a major issue with girls being girls. As if a female, acting in accordance with her female biology is somehow selling out the entire sex and ruining the work that was put in from millions of women before her time. These feminazis tell girls to not allow ‘men’ to dictate what clothes, degrees, and jobs they should have and instead, take it upon themselves to tell the girls what clothes, degrees, and jobs they should have. It makes no fucking sense that I should make my daughter do and play masculine activities for the sake of ‘equality’. That isn’t raising her in accordance with her wishes, which would just be me pushing the female imperative even further.

Here’s an idea, let your kid choose. Let your girl tell you if she is in to science or glitter and support her either way. Same thing with boys, my son is into sports – if he was into the clarinet I’d support that too.

Girls are girls & boys are boys and that is A-O-Fucking-K. You guys need to stop worrying about how you can use your children to push your own agenda. Living vicariously through your child is possibly one of the worst things a parent can do. You will forever doom the child to wondering if they are making these life choices for themselves or is it to make gender neutral mommy and daddy happy.

Should my daughter feel bad for playing with dolls and enjoying makeup? Should my son feel bad to doing man shit?

It’s ridiculous to even consider telling a child that he or she can choose to be a him or her. This leads to some serious confusion and self-identity issues.

Your boy will display masculine traits from the onset, embrace that do not repress it.

Your boy will display masculine traits from the onset, embrace that do not repress it.

Allow the boy to be a boy. Allow the boys to wrestle and rough house, be competitive, scoff at weakness and shun sharing their tears & feelings. If the girls want dresses and pink, then support it. Allow our children to live accordance with their biological programming. Doing otherwise leads to men who have never embraced their masculinity and women who are afraid to ever be submissive to a man out of societal pressure. Both will feel the void in their heart. They will forever feel that there is a missing piece to their puzzle, that the picture just isn’t quite whole.

As a parent it is your job to protect your child, raise it to the best of your ability with the tools you have, and to be the example for the child to emulate. With this in mind – Moms, be moms with your feminine beauty flowing. Dads, be masculine guys who show their sons what it means to be a man and set the bar from which your daughter will measure other men. It isn’t politically correct of me to say that little boys and little girls are different and therefore should be dealt with in a different manner. But FUCK PC PARENTING. I don’t write to get the most likes or followers, I write to get the message out there and to say what needs to be said. Stop raising your girls to believe they are the same as boys. Because they aren’t and when your daughter gets crushed by the stronger, faster, and larger football player you’ll realize that. Also, stop raising your boys to share all of their feelings and that everyone is a winner. It is the reason things like The Red Pill even exist, Boys aren’t wired like that and you are forcing them to repress their masculinity when they should be expressing it.

It’s bullshit like this that is preventing an entire generation from achieving their genetic potential as well as reaching the highest level of ‘life satisfaction’. Which, when you think of it is the most important lesson that a parent should pass on to their children; teaching them to love their true ‘self’. It is a sad fact that this sense of self confidence and ‘love’ is becoming more and more uncommon. You’re going to be the one who spends your entire life with you. Love your kids enough to allow them to enjoy the person they are walking their life path with, themselves.

  • Hunter
  • I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

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