Founding Fathers

Whether building nations or rebuilding your sense of ‘Self’ the same approach must be taken.

There is about to be a new resource available to men who are looking to reclaim their sense of Authenticity as well as Masculinity – The Fraternity of Excellence.

Doors open at 0900 EST on Christmas Eve

I’m pleased to say that I will be ‘Co-President‘ of this new venture along with Craig James from Masculine by Design. The Fraternity of Excellence is his brain-child along with the foundation from which the entire program is based. He called me a few months ago and told me roughly what it was he wanted to build for the men who needed it. I agreed as having interacted with him on Twitter and being on his PodCast, I’d been a fan of Craig from the beginning.

This Fraternity will be unlike anything else that has come before and I know it’s going to be a success because I’ve seen a variation of it working and thriving since the first of December.

December of Discipline is the latest 31 Days to Masculinity campaign I’m currently involved in, along with over 200 other men and one of the most repeated statements has been that the group forum and interactions which have taken place over the Slack application have made the greatest of differences.

It’s really bringing men together.

Not in some “You can do it” type of hollow phrases and motivational slogans but real world, tangible relationships are being forged.

The goal of Craig and I is that we build something which breaks down the electronic medium between men. We have also set out to provide an online location where the entirety of a man can be developed, assessed, and critiqued in a place where those critiquing are masculine men, not SJW types pushing a PC agenda.

There is a void which exists in all other areas that are currently available to men looking to reclaim their masculinity.

The Red Pill is about Sexual Strategy, nothing more or less. This does not offer anything for men looking to improve the other aspects to masculinity.

There are a few other subscription services aimed to help men, but their product is sub-par and you can tell they are trying to sell a lie instead of raw truths.

Craig and I are giving it to you straight, this will not be some soft spoken, cuddle session. You’re going to improve and get to work or we’re going to ask you to lave. This Fraternity is for men who have shit to do and they’re ready to do it.

What the Fraternity of Excellence also offers is privacy. This is a subscription based service, you pay by the month or the year. To those who think that is unfair as some men cannot afford it, I’ll say the same thing I said to those who bitched about having to buy into December of Discipline.

What will get you out of bed in the morning when you’re tired and sore?

If you don’t have any skin in the game, then what do you have to lose by not following through with your commitment to self? Nothing.

But, if you’re paying for something then you are going to be damn sure you get your money’s worth.

Craig and I are going to give you your money’s worth, and then some.

The Fraternity of Excellence will offer so much more than just a masculine forum, it will also include:

  • Weekly Videos/Q & A Panels with Craig and I
  • A Diverse Forum
  • Book of the Month discussion
  • Weekly Challenges
  • Members only content
  • VIP access to Craig and I
  • A community in which you can network, forge real world relationships with, and a means to keeping yourself accountable to the goals you’ve set.
  • In the future we will be providing conferences, merchandise, and again, the thing most desperately needed by modern men, brotherhood.

Craig and I are giving this everything we have, if you’ve enjoyed our content up to this point then you’re going to love when we bring it to the next level together.

Two authentic men working to raise the standard of all men, this is the next phase of TFA, 31DTM, and MBD.

To show our appreciation to those who’ve been loyal to our message and want to support what we’re doing, we’re offering the first 50 members a $29.99/mo lifetime membership fee.

Once those 50 slot are filled, the price will go to $49.99/mo where it will stay.

https://fraternityofexcellence.com

I hope to see you there.

Hunter

Finish Lines Are A Time For Reflection.

The Finish Line is a checkpoint for review of performance

There’s something to be said about the emotion associated with crossing the finish line.

It’s a time where you’ve accomplished a goal, you’re elated to of achieved this objective; but, this is only one of many goals and it isn’t the “ultimate goal”.

In the game of life, it is improvement and new experiences to the grave, death is the finish line.

Let’s take a step back from that Macro picture and look at the micro.

Look at the many victories which occur throughout our lives. What is the best way to handle them? What is the most optimal way to ensure that as we win, we are able to turn these victories into fuel and understanding which can be used to prevent complacency or “resting on your laurels”.

Similar to making your money make money, you’ve got to make your victories create victories.

How To Make That Happen

Crossing the finish line should be immediately accompanied with reflection on your performance and how you could have done better.

If you get the job you applied and interviewed for, you should look back and think on how you could have negotiated a higher salary, worked in a perk such as company vehicle, more vacation hours, the ability to telework, etc.

If you did well on your midterms/finals you should look at the grade and ask yourself which part did you struggle with; even if you aced the test, which part made you hesitate/take longer than the rest?

Received your varsity letter? Great. How do you make State, All Stars, or get the scholarship to help offset the rising price of college?

Real World Personal Example: I gave a speech which received a standing ovation and helped my fellow men at the 21 Convention. My takeaway from the event? I need to do more arm work and I need to be more comfortable giving presentations in front of crowds.

All of these minor victories in life should lead to the greater development of self.

Each competition you enter (Job hunting, writing, a race, a fight, everything) even if won, should highlight an area which can be developed in your person.

It is only after this period of reflection and deep introspection that you should allow yourself to bask in the glow of victory.

Look at the Floyd McGregor fight.

I’m sure that before he threw his victory party with money and bitches galore, Floyd sat there and went through the entire fight in his head, thinking of where he went wrong and what he would do to prevent that from happening again.

The same goes for you.

Let’s say you fuck a model and wake up to her making you coffee, what could you have done better?

Foreplay, escalation, etc.?

There’s always something to be gained, make sure you’re taking the time to find out where you could improve before patting yourself on the back for how well you did.

Hunter

If you would like to support The Family Alpha you may do so using the links below.

You can grab a copy of 31 Days to Masculinity HERE or support TFA & the next project (31DtM) by grabbing a t-shirt HERE

Donate(PayPal)

The Trident of Masculinity

Authentic masculine expression comes from the harmonization of the three different ‘selves‘ which exist inside each man.

These three selves are the:

  1. Physical Self
  2. Mental Self
  3. Spiritual Self

Like any tripod these legs are all independent of one another yet are entirely dependent on the supporting strength the other two provide.

If you are looking to live the most optimal of lives and achieve the greatest sense of physical strength, mental joy, and spiritual satisfaction, then each of these aspects to who you are as a man must be cultivated and a balance must be struck between them.

Have you seen the gurus who are entirely spiritual, yet would never be able to lift their fellow man if he were to fall as he simply does not have the strength?

What about the brilliant minds who can understand the most complex of formulas yet lack any ability to connect with those around them as they simply cannot tap into the spiritual connection which exists amongst all living things?

Lastly, have you seen the man who sculpts his body to replicate that of a Greek god yet he cannot tell you the last book he read or education he pursued?

These are simple stereotypes which I can find plenty of people who break the caricature, but you get my point. More often than naught, a man is exceptional in only one area or none at all.

So how do you develop these three different aspects of the ‘self’? How do you reach and maintain harmonious levels within your heart, mind, and soul?

You know the answer, it’s always the same.

Hard Work

You don’t just get the life that you want, you’ve got to work for it. Nobody is going to hand you anything, you aren’t just going to become more intelligent, healthier, or happier by willing it.

No, you’re going to have to make yourself uncomfortable and you’re going to have to do the things you’ve been putting off.

This is the entire premise of my book 31 Days to Masculinity. When I wrote that month long program the aim wasn’t to get men laid or help them reveal their six pack.

Instead, I focused on the entirety of the man to help him rebuild himself without the influence of a weaksauce society. Similar to the 21 Convention, I set the goal of helping men develop every aspect of who they were, developing the ‘Ideal’ man as Anthony Johnson puts it.

This is why the book sends each man on a different journey, what he has to do to get himself to optimal living if different than what you’ll have to do. Each journey is unique, but there are some universal overlaps and that is what this essay is about.

When you work to develop your physical, mental, and spiritual self you’ll find that the challenges you face, the pieces you find easier/more difficult, and final results are going to be entirely unique to you. Yet, the other men who also go through this transformation will understand exactly what you feel as they’ll of experienced the same thing, differently.

Physical

Without resistance, the body will not grow. Without putting stress on the body, you’ll never be able to appreciate the beauty of it nor will you ever know what it is capable of.

There are plenty of men out there who watch movies and think to themselves, if that happened to me I’d rise to occasion.

If you’re one of those guys, I’d like to ask you, why do you think you can do those things, have you practiced any of them? Have you put yourself in those situations in a training environment? Or, as is the case with most, you just assume you’ve got the natural skillsets to do what takes others years to achieve at the whim of fortune?

Our body adapts to the stress placed on it. I’m not going to tell you what it is that you must create with regards to programming as I know nothing about you. You’re reading my blog and are a man, that’s all I know at this moment.

Here is what I can tell you. Weight lifting and strength training as a whole are instrumental in an overall development of the physical self.

You must lift weights.

I don’t care what your program is, I don’t care if you choose to implement a mixed martial art or running, and I don’t care the frequency, intensity, or preference you may have. Lift weights, get active, and ensure that you’re putting your body in motion and that you’re recording your results so that you can look at trend analysis and adjust the programming accordingly for the most efficient means of training without injury.

Remember, you cannot ‘out exercise‘ a bad diet.

This means that you must pay considerably more attention to what it is that you’re putting into your body.

Proper nutritional programming is essential for sustained superior output. Again, I don’t give a shit what your diet looks like so long as you’re ensuring it is high quality and conducive to a healthy body. Your physical, mental and spiritual self are completely dependent upon what it is they are using for energy.

TL;DR: Put good fuel into your body.

Do not let focus on the food cause an oversight on the importance of the fluids you’re consuming. Water is essential, it is the only thing that you have to have, all else is optional. Some find supplementing their water with electrolytes or other vitamins helps keep the intake from feeling monotonous. It’s much easier to drink a gallon of water a day if you’re enjoying each sip.

It is this combination of proper stress, fuel, and hydration that you’ll crate your most optimal physical self, and each of those also plays into the health and capability of your mental self.

Mental

It seems to me that the majority of men out there know that their minds are in shambles, yet they have no fucking clue how to fix it. So they add more to it, create more stuff, and fill it with more thinking that they’re lacking in something.

Gentlemen, I will tell you now, you do not need more, you need less.

In order to reach the greatest heights and develop the strongest mental ‘self’ you can, you’ve got to remove the unessential. Get rid of the shit that is clogging up your daily life. Not just inside your head, but the environment in which your head spends its time as well.

There is a reason I deleted my Facebook.

I could make more $$$ if I went onto that platform with TFA, but there is no fucking way because Facebook bogs my mind down. Seeing people ‘act‘ happy, while living miserable lives was driving me insane. Instead of keeping fakebook to stay in touch with my Navy brothers across the country, I just deleted it.

What’s the point?

I chose facebook as my example because that is what a lot of people find themselves getting caught up on.

You’re watching other people do shit and comparing your life to theirs and it is absolutely detrimental to your mental well-being.

It doesn’t have to be facebook though, your mental clutter could be:

  1. Seeking approval from your parents.
  2. Keeping the wife happy
  3. Playing it ‘safe‘ and doing what you’re “supposed” to do
  4. Keeping up with the Jones’s
  5. Trying to control things you have no control over
  6. Giving Time Vampires your most valuable resource – Your Time
  7. Confusing accumulation of ‘stuff‘ as accumulation of happiness
  8. Identifying with MSM or Politics
  9. Avoiding confrontation with who you are vs who you want to be
  10. Living in the mold created by society

Each of these things plagues plugged-in men in society, some more than others. The fact is, until you tackle whatever issues you’ve built in your mind, you’ll never achieve the optimal level of mental health.

I’m not happy all of the time, but I’m a happy dude. I’m happy because there is no clutter in my mind anymore.

How did I reach this point?

I faced my demons head on

Not only did I go through and delete people, things, stuff from my life which I did not find value, but I also removed physical pieces of ‘stuff’ from my home.

If there is clutter in your bedroom, how can you sleep peacefully?

If your writing area is a mess, how can you remain focused when writing?

If your living room looks like it came from a magazine, how can you say it represents who you are as a man?

You don’t have to live life as a minimalist, but more does not equal better. You should be able to look at everything in your home and know its purpose and value to your life immediately. If you don’t know why you have three different sets of fine china or why you have so many photos and paintings on your walls, remove them.

It’s ok for walls and horizontal surfaces to be bare.

You decide if your house is a home.

You have to take that same approach to what is going on between your ears. Let the mind freely wander and as you find old grudges, resentment, fears, desire to please others, etc. Throw it out.

You’re done with it, you’ve made it this far but you aren’t going any further so long as you carry this excess mental baggage around.

Toss it

Watch how much lighter your mental self feels once you face these things and remove them, watch how much more you smile.

People said I was insane and weird for deleting facebook. As soon as I did it I realized how many friends I didn’t have and it was liberating.

There is a reason I’ve been able to avoid the pitfalls which are so often associated with marriage and fatherhood.

I don’t play by the same rules as others and my mental self is flourishing because of it. Give yourself that gift, give yourself the gift of freedom to live authentically. Once you establish these new habits while removing the old toxic ones, you’ll find that you’re not only happier, but more connected to not only your true ‘self’, but also your fellow man and your environment as a whole.

This is where the spiritual self is found, this is the aspect of man that the world admires, other men respect, and women will never truly understand.

Spiritual

The most recent example of a man combining the three aspects of his masculine self can be seen in the Las Vegas shooting.

You see, this goes beyond specific religions; it is the spiritual aspect of our masculinity which makes us appreciate the beautiful delicacy of a flower, the innocence of children, the godlike power of the feminine, the brotherhood among all men, and the human connection between all people.

In my recent essay A Beautiful Suicide I wrote about Sonny Melton, a man who heard gunshots and did not panic (His Mental Self Was Strong), so he wrapped himself around his wife as they ran from the shooting (His Physical self was strong) he was shot and killed, his wife lived. Something we have to recognize, was his decision to put her out of harm’s way, his decision that if someone was going to die, it was going to be him, this shows that his Spiritual self was strong.

The same goes for Taylor Winston, the Marine who stole a truck to save lives. His Mental made the decision to steal the truck, Physical enabled him to move bodies, but it was his Spiritual which propelled him to act and save others instead of just himself in the first place. Without a healthy balance between the three, this man would remain unknown and at least 30 more people would be dead.

  • Men are disposable
  • Men carry the burden of performance
  • Women and Children get on lifeboats before men

We are ok with all of this because we see the beauty and value there is in those who bring life into the world and we know that if there is anyone who is going to have a fighting chance to survive the shots, sinking of a ship, or fight it is going to be a man.

A man is willing to die for what it is he believes in. A man is going to reach out to complete strangers and dedicate his time and energy to their success because he feels the connection all men share. What do you think The 21 Convention was all about?

The speakers there gave very valuable time pro bono to help their fellow man because they give a shit about the mission.

When I’m in my Jeep I’ll often lose myself to just feeling the breeze and cruising, no music (sometimes it’s level 10 – not always) while other times I’ll appreciate the flavor of a whiskey, the sound of my kids laughter and screaming as they pile out of the house to open my Jeep door and greet me.

We’re all connected and I’d argue men are more empathetic, while delivering in a much harsher tone than women. A woman is motherly, a man will slap you down then build you up – is either better?

No

The masculine and feminine are complementary to one another

But this is for the men from a man. If you want the most from your spiritual aspect of being a man, you have to start connecting with others. There is too much hate in this world, and it comes from a place of self-loathing.

When you feel how good life can be, you want to share that and help others reach the same point, it’s literally what I’m doing now.

Haters are going to hate; don’t be one of them.

Instead of trying to rise by pushing others down, act like a tide that lifts every boat higher while rising yourself.

Before you mock, disparage, or demean another, realize you’re killing the spiritual connection in yourself. If someone deserves your wrath, it is better to straight up nothing them.

The opposite of love is not hate, it is apathy.

If you want more than you have, you’ve got to start doing things differently. You have the life you deserve, if you want to reach optimal levels of living and get more from each day you’re granted the privilege to enjoy, then you need to harness and bring balance to your physical, mental, and spiritual Self.
Hunter

If you would like to support The Family Alpha you may do so using the links below.

You can grab a copy of 31 Days to Masculinity HERE or support TFA & the next project (31DtM) by grabbing a t-shirt HERE

Donate(PayPal)

 

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Most Haters are Filled with Envy

The critic hates most that which he would have done himself if he had had the guts.”                                                                                                                                           –  Steven Pressfield

We live in a world where mediocrity is awarded, conformity is praised, and the standard of performance is so low that the most minimal of effort places you in the top 25% of your peers.

Everyone acts like a crab in the bucket of life and they will try to pull you down if you attempt to leave the confines where everyone else dwells.

The Problem here is that You’re No Crab.

You’ve decided that you’re going to pursue your passion in life and that you’re no longer going to pacify your masculine energy in order to keep those around you comfortable.

You’re going to disregard the expectations of a weak society.

People genuinely want you to do well, just never better than themselves.

You’re going to pursue what it is you want to do as opposed to what is expected of you

And

You’re going to walk your path and refuse to follow the one which has been forged for you by a society which hates everything your raw masculine self represents.

This isn’t about keeping the peace with others, it’s about living the most optimal life and more importantly, living it on your own terms.

Frame = Reality

When you create your own indestructible frame, people rage vitriol & hate towards everything you achieve.

Why?

Because your success acts as a mirror which reflects their mediocre performance up to this point.

I wish men viewed other’s success as fuel for their own growth but the truth is that rarely do people have the intestinal fortitude to cheer on another’s greatness.

Disregard the Opinion of the Weak

No matter what it is you achieve, haters are going to hate. Not because what you did was wrong, but simply because you did.

Most talk, very few do.

When you choose to do, it makes the talkers look like pussies, so they spread hate.

I say good.

Use the lack of support given to you by strangers, friends, and family as fuel for future growth.

The more resistance you face the more likely it is that you’re on the right path. Now, don’t confuse this with people calling you out for being an asshole. If you’re a douchebag who kicks people when they’re down, then they hate isn’t a sign of success, but rather a sign that you’re a fucking asshole – know the difference.

The actions and opinion of others does not define your reality, and they hate you for it.

They hate you because they wish they had the balls to enter the arena. They sit in the stands and talk shit while you walk onto the battlefield prepared for war.

Win or lose, you tried; few can say this.

– Hunter Drew

You can grab a copy of 31 Days to Masculinity HERE or support TFA & the next project (31DtM) by grabbing a t-shirt HERE

Face Your Fear of Rejection

If you want to sing, sing. When you stop worrying about what others will think, you can then walk on water.

            For some, the scariest possibility in the world is to be alone.

I was watching a Joe Rogan stand up special the other night and he said something which really impacted me.

He said, “Humans are such social creatures that the worst thing you can do to them is put them in solitary confinement. A person in prison, with all freedom stripped from him can still be punished by being removed from the population; forced to be alone.

This same fear of ‘solitary confinement’ can be found outside of prison. In fact, this fear is acting like a governor which limits the extent to which a person is living their life.

This ‘glass ceiling’ is something we need to eliminate from our lives and by doing so we’ll act as an example which will help our fellow man take action in their own life.

Fear of being the Outcast

The potential for being rejected or ostracized from your social group is not something which only terrifies you psychologically, it also impacts you on a physiological level.

Your body will actively work against whatever action will lead to a judging panel from your peers.

Why do you think it’s so difficult for people to:

  • Speak in public?
  • Publish an essay?
  • Release a painting to the world?

The answer is that each of these acts require you to make yourself vulnerable and open to judgement.

This judgement of your ideas puts you at risk for expulsion from the group and viewing it from a historical perspective, if you’re tossed from your tribe, you’re dead.

Now here comes the other side of that double edged sword.

If you never put yourself at risk of judgement and rejection, are you ever truly alive?

I don’t think so and it’s because of that driving force to experience the entire spectrum of living that I promote taking those risks and putting yourself out there.

It’s a New Age

Our physical response to being judged stems from a time period where life itself was linked with the tribe.

It’s 2017, you aren’t dead if your friends don’t hang out with you anymore.

In fact, a majority of your friends are people you shouldn’t be hanging out with in the first place.

Statistically speaking, your closest friends are probably guys who live a mediocre life, exhibit conformist behavior, and are fully plugged in and supportive of the feminine imperative.

These men aren’t challenging you to raise your standard of living or to authentically express your masculine nature; yet you’re afraid to lose them.

Stick with the right Group

Find the Lions and Run With Them

The next time you feel the desire to speak up or take an action, even though you normally take the passive path of avoiding judgement, I want you to let it out.

  • Your hands may get sweaty.
  • You may feel your pulse in your teeth.
  • Your ears might get hot.

But dammit man you have  to take action.

This isn’t limited to asking someone to get out of your way while shopping at Target (which some can’t do) this covers the entire spectrum of performance.

  • Approaching a girl at the bar.
  • Giving a speech to your class.
  • Standing up to your parents
  • Starting a blog and actually writing posts for the world to critique and criticize.
  • Saying “No”
  • Stepping in when you feel the need to get involved, possibly requiring physical confrontation.
  • Displaying your artwork, poetry, or other creation you’ve been wanting to show the world.

For all of these to provide you with the greatest amount of satisfaction, you have to do.

Yes, all of these open you up to rejection, being ostracized due to your opinion, you may lose the fight or argument, and your essay or artwork may be brutally massacred by those who view and review it.

So what?

Aren’t you tired of wondering, What If‘?

  • What if you’d said something?
  • What if you’d written out those great stories that were in your head?
  • What if you entered your artwork into a competition?
  • What if you spoke to that cute girl at the bookstore?

Here’s my question for you: What if you made the decision to live your life as opposed to going over the what ifs inside your mind.

Find out the answer to ‘what if’?

Put yourself out there and face the potential for rejection head on.

Hunter

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Mentouring – A 21 Convention Review

First off, I have to give credit where credit is due, my wife came up with the term mentouring.

While I wouldn’t say that the speakers themselves are “touring” to provide their speeches, the event itself is literally touring the globe and speakers are coming from across the nation.

The 21 Convention is an international convention and one that is continuing to grow, especially after having incorporated The Red Pill community.

I haven’t written a post in a few weeks as I’ve been working on my thesis (submitted & graded – 100% finally done with my Master’s) as well as preparing for the convention.

This piece will be my only written review of The 21 Convention. I will be doing a Podcast with Craig James of Masculine by Design as well as Gentlemen Jak from A King’s Castle.

Departure

Leaving the family is never fun, but our families are not our mission and there are times where we must separate what we want to do from what we have to do.

I had to attend this; writing, speaking, and helping other men learn how to better help themselves is my mission in life and there are times where it conflicts with my responsibilities as a husband and father.

This is the burden men have, this is the cross we bear.

Attending this event was going to change my life, I knew this going into it. I also knew that by attending this event I was going to miss two of my son’s baseball games, a team which I am the head coach of.

Missing those games sucked, fortunately for me I have a stellar wife who recorded videos and kept me up to date with what was going on (they won both).

My wife made the distance seem a little smaller, and I greatly appreciated her doing that for me.

The Speakers

I interacted with every speaker, but the ones I am going to list here are the ones that made an impact:

Rian Stone: I think the first thing he said to me was, “Hey faggot” from there everything was exactly as you’d expect from two sailors. I was with this guy every day before he had to take off early and quite literally the reason my speech did so well was because of the one he gave right before me that I built upon. He’s a solid dude who was exactly what I expected.

Rian is the kind of guy that if he showed up at my house today, we’d be right back at it. Similar to my approach, he made himself available to everyone the entire time,  and one who showed exactly why he was invited to speak.

Ivan Throne: Ivan and I spent each day together discussing family, business, the future, the present, and the past. I became instant friends with him as well as his dog, which I’ve come to calling SwoopDogg as this canine got more chicks flocking to him in one night than the entirety of the convention all week.

Ivan is the real deal, he’s passionate about what he believes in and his presentation was one which struck a chord with the men attending. He pulled no punches and drove the point home that as men, it is our duty to act and if you choose the path of passive existence, you need to get the fuck out of the way.

I do not believe this was the last time I’ll be seeing him in person.

Rollo Tomassi: This fucking guy is the OG of TRP & in my mind the Manosphere in general, he’s a funny motherfucker, and in all honesty was one of the leading forces behind the shift in the 21 Convention’s direction.

Rollo made himself completely accessible to the attendees and I think he took the brunt of the questions, stories, and overall swarm of discussion. Again, this is not an easy tasking nor is it required for him to do so.

I wanted to talk to him as much as everyone else, but this was about them, not us and Rollo was a fucking champ about it the entire time.

We’ve all read the posts, but to hear him speak on the subjects of masculinity, hypergamy, etc. it brings new life to those old words and really drove the point even deeper in your mind.

Rollo has a post for everything and I half expected him to pass out papers of essays instead of answering questions, but night after night he was there with a line of men trying to get a hold of this Red Pill rock-star. He’s is a standup guy who lives the message he writes.

Tanner Guzy: Tanner is a guy who I’ve messaged behind closed doors to let know that I appreciated his writing and while we don’t really interact that much on the web, I’m a huge fan of everything he has going on.

When we met in person, it was an immediate familiarity. He came right in, shook hands, said hello, and we just kicked it off. His wife was there as his photographer and she was incredibly nice as well. I spoke with both of them at a house party about my kids, their kids, online business, etc.

Tanner and his wife are quality people and I believe they’re exactly what this world needs more of. My blog and future products are going to be of higher quality directly because of the conversations we shared.

Goldmund Unleashed: Goldmund is the real deal, there is no conformist, fake, or ‘showman’ in him. He is who he is and does what he does.

He is the most immediately connected man I met at the event, quite literally he just popped up behind Rian and I with his coffee and it was all smiles and joking from there. I’m not even sure we formally met, we just started talking and having a great time.

That laid back attitude can be misinterpreted as going with the flow, which if you heard his speech that is not the case at all. He created a solid layout for these men to help them start looking inside themselves to find out who it is they truly are and where it is they want to go.

He gives a shit and took time to speak with each man who wanted a book, to check out his Masculine Accessories (I got some swag and my T levels jumped by 50).

He also helped each man who presented their individual insecurities with talking to women; that isn’t easy when you’ve got 20+ men asking you for a tailored program, but Goldmund hung in there and answered them all.

Christian McQueen: Christian was the person my wife was worried about as he is ‘The Playboy‘ and seeing the dude live, it’s no fucking joke. He is intense when it comes to business, professional when it comes to dealing with those asking questions, and a fucking blast to be around. I had a few conversations with the guy and he is a stand up dude who I’d want in my corner any day.

It wasn’t all girls either. We talked masculinity, business, family, etc. Most try to pigeonhole him into this one caricature when in fact he is much more and I think that bothers people.

He knows his shit and for me, as a married man with kids in a totally different stage in life, I still connected with the message as authenticity and masculinity are universally understood and respected.

Socrates: This fucking dude. I didn’t get much time with him at all as people always jumped in, but god dammit if I didn’t feel like I knew the guy forever. During our ‘post event‘ interview with Rollo, I was so fucking exhausted that one glass of Crown I drank during the interview blacked me out. I don’t remember shit from the interview except laughing my ass off with Socrates.

I later found out that I went to eat with Soc and ended up passing the fuck out at the table. Don’t mix no sleep with booze.

If that interview comes to light, I expect you’ll be laughing as hard as we were.

Anthony Johnson: I saved the best for last. This is the dude who made it happen and the final ‘Yes‘ to get me to this event. We didn’t get to interact much as his was handling everything for the event, but he believes in what it is he says and the mission/challenge he has taken on, just wait until you hear his final speech, motivating as fuck.

The Event

My wife asked me, “Why did you stay for every speech and always go down to the bar or out with the guys when you could grab some needed sleep?”

The answer was simple, I wanted to provide every opportunity I could for the men attending to see another man living his passion, embodying his message, and finding comfort in the discomfort.

I wasn’t sleeping well while in Florida, maybe 2-4 hours a night. But, how could I tell these men to push past their comfort zone if I was making sure I squeezed in naps?

Few, if any speaker stayed for the entirety of the event. I did, not because I really cared about what everyone was putting out, but rather because I knew that during each break these men would be asking me questions about the subject being discussed and if I wasn’t listening, I’d have no clue what they were talking about.

I, along with every other speaker was swarmed during each break, each dinner, event, outing, etc.

That shit is mentally taxing.

I wasn’t truly prepared for the relentless questions, stories, etc. On top of that, I gave my first live presentation and first speech in front of a crowd ever, I was nervous as shit and to receive a standing ovation after the fact was surreal.

It was a little overwhelming at first but I did my best to keep up and ensure I was saying what I meant and giving everyone their own time and attention.

Still, even when speakers were trying to talk to one another and would be interrupted, we’d give the attendee our all and didn’t treat it as any sort of annoyance,  we weren’t there for ourselves, we were there for the attendees.

The men who dedicated their time and money gaining access to those who were sending out a message of masculine reclamation deserved everything we had to offer, and each of us gave it.

I hung out in downtown Orlando with these men until 0400, then attended conferences from 0900 to 1900 then went out again until 0300 walking the streets with Jack Donovan and Ivan Throne which is something that I, as well as the other men will remember for quite some time.

This event was a game changer & 2018 is going to be even better.

Anthony Johnson has created the next step for the ‘Manosphere’ and the fight to reclaim masculinity in men’s lives and preserve it in our society.

He is removing the medium, bringing men together, and producing content at a rate which is impressively aggressive.

Return & What’s Next?

I’ve been home for roughly three days now and I’ve dedicated most of that time to thinking about, what now?

For the speakers, I hope this acts as fuel for future growth and desire to help get content out for those men who continue to struggle, plugged-in to a society who hates their authentic nature.

For the attendees, I hope the words were received and a plan is being formulated to put them into action.

Remember, Acta, Non VerbaDeeds, Not Words.

You spent valuable time and money to attend the event, make it count towards something. You need to make those words received become fuel for tangible improvements in your life. You attended The 21 Convention for a reason, now face that reason head on and make sure you come out on top.

Living an authentically masculine life sets an example which breaks the bonds for your brethren. Your example will allow them to break the conformist ranks, so take action and embody your message.

For myself, I’ve seen these men face to face. I’ve shaken their hands, heard their stories, and witnessed how real this all is. I hope to create products and write pieces which act as a catalyst for sustained superior performance.

I’m not worried about the next two weeks as these men are riding a high, I’m worried about two months from now when the desire of comfort comes creeping in. When it does, my writing will be there to catch any man who begins to fall back into the hole from which they came.

All of the speakers threw a rope to those who needed help to climb out of that hole. Now you must climb, and when you reach the top, you must ask yourself, do you march forward living the rest of your life in a genuine manner, or do you choose to stick around and throw a rope to the next man.

Either way you’re right, but those who choose to throw a rope, I look forward to seeing the resources and content you provide.

Hunter

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Why Perfection Will Kill You

Sometimes you feel as though it’s you against the entire world. I get it, I’ve been there.

I often write about the positives of my life.

I write about how well my son and daughter are doing, how great my wife and I are doing, and that my life, as a whole, is awesome.

Today, I want to talk about the deep valleys I’ve walked to reach these peaks. I want to do this not so I can feel that fresh stab of past pains in my heart, but rather, because I want men to see, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and you just need to keep walking through hell to get there.

I’ve been there. I get it.

I’ve been in the car, unable to hear the sound of music or wind because I’m so lost in my head. Heart pounding, pulse in my teeth, with the loudest voice in my head saying, “What would happen if you just pulled the steering wheel into that tree, pole, or median…?

I’ve been in the shower, the only place I could truly be alone and just sat on the floor, staring at the drain, letting the hot water scald me while I regressed into the abyss of my mind wondering, “Where did it go so wrong…?

I’ve punched through the walls.

I’ve had the drunken nights.

I’ve screamed into the pillows.

I’ve cried my eyes out until there wasn’t a drop left to shed.

I’ve told myself, “It wasn’t supposed to be like this, I did everything right, there’s no point to this fucking life…

I’ve reached the point where I didn’t care if I was alive or dead.

The point where my only relief was sleeping because that was my only escape from reality. All I wanted to do was retreat to the realm of unconscious and even there I was at risk of attack from the self-hate and loathing which I felt in my day to day existence.

Retreat only prolongs the pain; it kicks the solution to the suffering down the road.

I decided to stand up and choose risking death on my feet than to continue ‘living’ another day on my knees.

I did this alone.

I should have had my brethren there to help me.

Society has recognized this and in an attempt to deconstruct and eradicate the masculine man, they’ve made it so men cannot find one another.

This is why I’m writing.

This is a rope being thrown to you, hoping you find it and climb out of the hole before you choose to end it all, or worse, quit and remain ‘living’ in your grave.

Living in a constant state of anxiety, fear, and self-repression isn’t living at all, it’s barely existing and it is this state which I’m hoping this piece helps pull men from.

You don’t have to be Perfect, you have to be you.

The anxiety, suicidal thoughts, depression, and self-hate stem from the thoughts of how things ‘should be‘.

You look at who you are and you compare it to how the perfect self would be. You think of your life as it is and how you feel your life should be.

You’ve said the nice things and walked the righteous path,yet the ‘asshole’ is winning and here you are, chopped liver.

Listen to me now brothers, your life is exactly how it should be and you are who you’ve decided to be.

At any point you could make the decision to flip the switch and start living a genuine life. It isn’t easy and it isn’t quick, but it beats living another minute hating the fact that you’re still awake.

We can destroy that voice inside telling you how terrible you are, how inadequate you are, how stupid you are…

We can silence it through action.

We can take swift action and overpower that internal demon with overwhelming violence.

I say we because your fellow men are here to help, but it is you who will be executing the action and delivering the pain to that internal demon.

That violence will be lifting weights when you don’t want to.

Following your own imperative and not the one society has instructed you to follow and support.

Answering life questions honestly.

Discovering who you are by being who you are as opposed to the guy you think others will like.

These acts destroy that voice, they take the power from it.

Life isn’t about perfection.

It isn’t about being the person you thought you would be when you were younger.

It’s about being who you are, regardless of the reception you receive from others. Life is full of conformist personalities looking to gain favor by replicating one another.

Break free from that mold.

When you do that, almost immediately you’ll feel light shine through the dark clouds in your heart and mind. When you tell someone, “No.” for the first time, you’ll feel so empowered because for the first time, you’ve drawn a boundary.

Only then will you begin to experience the joy that exists in the world in which we live.

It’s now up to you to decide what you do with the fire which burns inside.

Only then will you find love for yourself and a flame in your heart, passion for life, and desire to continue on.

Stop thinking ‘you used to be somebody‘ or that life would be great ‘if only X didn’t happen‘ because everyone  used to be somebody; only the strong choose to continue being somebody in the here and now and guess what? X happened to you, but it isn’t you.

What happened to you must not become who you are.

It happened, be strong enough to leave it behind and refuse to identify with it; that’s victim mindset and you aren’t a victim.

You’re a man who is desperately needed in our society.

Drop the Perfect, Embrace the Harsh Reality; Find Comfort in the Discomfort.

Life is tough.

You are tougher.

Don’t believe it?

You’re still here aren’t you?

Everyone goes through dark nights. At some point, every man is going to have to stare into the abyss that exists in his self.

That’s part of being a man, it’s a part of our burden of performance. We love fiercely, the inverse is also true. We feel the highest highs and the lowest lows because we are the more romantic of the sexes.

For those who are currently choosing to reside in those deep valleys, this is me putting my hand out there. You’re being given a chance to take hold and start climbing that mountain with me and your fellow men.

Upon finishing this essay, take a moment to assess where you’re at and recognize you aren’t alone in this battle.

If you need to, reach out to me or any other man whom you relate to for help. All will listen, men help men.

Do not discuss your problem without any intention of finding a solution; that’s redundancy without progress.

Work towards solving the problem.

That may mean divorce, breaking up with a toxic woman, removing negative friends and family from your life, etc.

Whatever is required to help you remove the incessant voice in your head telling you that you aren’t good enough and that you need to be ‘perfect’; do that thing.

Life is too short to waste the beauty of it wishing things weren’t the way they are.

Embrace reality.

You are who you are and your life is what it is.

Today, choose to stand.

Choose to get off your knees and take a stand against those who look to beat you down into submission.

Existing is not living.

Choose to embrace your authentic masculine nature and if others find issue with that, so be it; Your life’s purpose is not to make those around you comfortable.

Acta Non Verba,

Hunter

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