There are people out there still waiting for permission to live the life they want to live and if that man is you, read on as it’s past time you got yourself heading in the direction you want your life to go.
Whether it’s a case of you resting on your laurels and achievements from High School and College or you never had an example or Rite of Passage to let you know you’re an adult now, it doesn’t matter.
You’ve got to take responsibility for where you’re headed in life.
Your life experience is up to you.
You are literally the only person who chooses what you do and what you allow others to do to you, be it directly or indirectly. If you’re looking to change your life experience and enjoyment of being on Earth, you need to be intentional with those two things.
1. How to fix your habits.
You need to live a better life if you want a better life.
Sitting and watching hundreds of hours on how to throw the perfect curveball will not make you a great curveball pitcher:
- You have to go out and take the mound
- You have to train your strength and flexibility
- You have to eat in a way that supports your training
- You have to sleep, study, and practice over and over again
- You have to practice throwing to find your best release point
You have to do the work which will position you to performing the act in a successful manner.
This is exactly the same in life.
If you want to live a life where you’re confident in who you are, then you need to do things that will make you confident in who you are and I’ll tell you right now I don’t know a single person who looks good naked, has a great relationship with their friends and family, and has enough money to meet their needs that is insecure or unhappy.
These people do the things needed to get them to living that life; their success didn’t “just happen” and they weren’t lucky, they worked their ass off and put in the reps.
How you do one thing is how you do all things and if how you’ve been doing life has gotten you to the point where you believe it needs an overhaul, you’ve got to accept that your behaviors, actions, and daily habits are also going to need a serious overhaul.
Make a list of what you do every day, from when you wake up to when you go to bed focusing more on the routine things than the “once in a while things”.
Then look at that list and start adding things you know would help (waking up earlier is a big one, starting the day by brushing teeth and dressing intentionally is another) and then look at what you can remove.
If every day you spend 3 hours looking at workout videos or reading business books yet you’re fat and don’t have a business, it’s time you stopped researching and started doing.
Kill the analysis paralysis.
Stop thinking of what you need to do and start doing the things you know you should have always done.
If you’d like to work one on one to get you back in motion, I have several options, but they all start with an email – ZSmall@TheFamilyAlpha.com
2. How to stop disrespect.
If someone is disrespecting you, you need to first understand and accept the fact that you aren’t deserving of it.
This may be hard for you to hear, but you don’t deserve to be treated like shit, by anyone.
Nothing I type from this moment forward will work until that settles in; you really need to ask yourself, are you even prepared to face the fact that in order to live your best life you may have to leave the people closest to you?
Drawing boundaries and telling others what is and is no longer acceptable only works two ways.
- You do it and you remain steadfast in your commitment to correcting and enforcing the boundary each and every time; A boundary you don’t enforce is not a boundary. There are no passes or slip-ups if you say you want something to stop, it stops, end of discussion.
- You remain true to your commitment 100%. If you tell people you’re changing your habits and you expect them to correct the way they’ve been dealing with you, you can’t go back to how you were. There’s nothing worse than a hypocrite.
Disrespect continues until it’s forced to end, be it removal or confrontation resulting in an understanding.
Worst case, you move on with your life without the anchors.
When I got sober, I knew it would hit my relationship with several people (negatively so) what I didn’t realize is how many people it would inspire and have a positive impact on.
Regardless of how it hit others, I was ready to lose everything if it meant saving myself. Fortunately, that was not the case, but I was ready to go scorched Earth; I’d rather lose fake friends than keep them and lose myself and you need to be willing to go the distance if it’s time for you to make lifelong change.
“The Dean” and I Break It Down
Steve Williams and I broke down ways that men can reclaim control over the development and direction of their life on The Family Alpha Podcast: Listen on iTunes or Soundcloud (below)
Your salvation rests with you and you alone;
the actions needing to be taken only happen if you take them, sounds simple but you’d be quite surprised how many people think success “will just happen“.
People like myself or Steve (Checkout his YouTube content here) may motivate or inspire you to take action, but at the end of the day you either committed to doing the work and you did it…or you didn’t.
If you do, you’ll experience the change and growth that is necessary for you to attain the level in life you want to experience in your limited time on this spinning rock.
Reminder that you may have screwed this process up several times before, but you’re reading this now and because of that, there’s proof that you’ve still got some gas left in the tank; let’s use it.
Let’s give it another go and get you working to help yourself get back in gear and along the way you’ll start generating your own fuel within and day by day, right decision by right decision, you’ll become a self-propelled being of masculine excellence and focused direction.
Acta Non Verba,
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Thank You In Advance