cigoL Fat Edition

This will become a running series of sorts. Backwards logic can be found in most modern movements, such as the ‘Health at every size‘. With that said, this post will obviously be focusing on the Fat that’s weighing my country down.

To think you can ignore a problem until it resolves itself is so backwards and illogical that if I hadn’t witnessed it firsthand time and again, I’d never believe people actually behaved like this.

Saying you love someone more than anything yet you’re unable to directly confront them on an issue should show you that you do not love them more than you love the current comfort you’re enjoying in your life. That obese child is not going to ‘grow out of it‘, that chubby teen girl is not going to ‘blossom into a beauty‘, there is never going to be a ‘right time’ to have the difficult conversation with these loved ones about their issues…

But you have too…if you do not, they’ll eventually reach the point of ‘no return’ and forever suffer the entirely preventable negative health complications which could have been avoided had you only had the courage to say something.

I’ve already covered the growing (no pun intended) population of Funny Fat Guys as well as the need to work with your wife to Balance the Scales so I will focus this post on those we interact with on a relatively frequent basis or are a part of our lives and we give enough of a shit about them that we are willing to take the difficult, yet necessary actions.

*I’d like to note, this applies to those who are extremely underweight as well.

We’ll be covering:

  1. Fat Family
  2. Fat Kids
  3. Fat Friends
  4. Fat Pets

Fat Family

You don't have the time you think you have, act now before it's too late to make a difference.

You don’t have the time you think you have, act now before it’s too late to make a difference.

You may have a fat mom, dad, brother, or sister and while you’ve noted their growing weight and declining health, you’ve avoided directly bringing it up or looking the other way when they struggle to get out of a chair, move around a restaurant, or fit on a plane; how has that worked for you and them so far?

How has their life improved because of your silence? How are you able to talk about their declining health, possibly to other members in your family without reaching the point where you throw your comfortable relationship to the side in order to do what must be done?

You must make the difficult decision now to risk losing that person and forever ruining the relationship in order to save their life.

I know it sucks, I know you feel your heart try to rip through your chest when you think of it. I know you feel you won’t have the right words or that the conversation will turn immediately to blame, yelling, anger, regret, guilt, etc.

I know that this could result in a strained relationship for the rest of their life without improvement of health on their part so you’ll feel it was all for naught…

But that isn’t the truth, because if you do make the decision to have that conversation and take that more difficult path of direct confrontation, you’ll be able to go to the grave knowing that at least you tried.

When everyone else stood in the stands watching this loved one eat themselves to the grave you stepped into the arena and fought.

Maybe you win, maybe you lose, but at least when your family member is struggling with confidence, unable to live, and slowly dying in front of your eyes while all others wish they’d done more and for the rest of their days will have that regret, you will not, because you acted.

Others may say that you calling your family member out is disrespectful, especially if it is a parent, but this isn’t about respect or allowing others to remain comfortable, it’s about life. When you are fat you lack confidence, you lack physical capability, and you suffer preventable health complications on the mind as well as body. You carry that weight mentally, physically, and spiritually.

You cannot hang Polaroids if you cannot live…

Fat Kids

This is becoming the 'norm' Stop It

This is becoming the ‘norm’ Stop It

Your children will perform to the standard you accept, not the one you expect.

There are a lot of parents of fat children who talk about how, back in their day they didn’t have tablets. What kind of bullshit sorcery are these people talking about, these parents buy their kid a tablet then bitch about kids on tablets.

They can’t bitch about kids on tablets, I can because when the sun is out, my kids are out. I’m not having a screen raise them, in fact I advise families Kill the TV and start investing in quality time together.

Fat kids are the product of weak parents, this is a non-negotiable fact and I have spent hours arguing/discussing this with people in my real life and online. There is no reason a child should be overweight *barring diagnosed conditions which are wicked fucking rare & even those conditions only account for 10-20lb weight gain.

The reason kids are fat is because they are sedentary for a plethora of reasons, their diet is fucking shit, and their parents don’t give a fuck or are placing emphasis on work and comfort over the more difficult path of actually raising their Sons (Post Here for Boys) & Daughters (Post here for girls).

Your child’s life is heavily influenced by the standard of upbringing they receive from you, the parent. The habits, relationship with food, fitness, and overall approach to life will be developed from the actions you’re taking.

Kids follow your example, not your advice.

If you are eating right and working out, there is no reason that you should not be applying this to your child’s life as well. They are never too young to get active and get moving with you or on their own.

My daughter is 4 and she was downstairs with me today doing kettlebell swings while my wife and I dead-lifted. Then, she was showing me how close she is to doing a split and asking about stretches. My son is the same way, always doing push-ups or climbing, running, etc. The kid was outside late last night using our front light as a spotlight so he could keep throwing his football in the air and try to catch it one-handed “like Odell Beckham Jr.

Foster an environment in your home where you cook with your kids, have them cook for you, and while you’re doing so talk to them about the ingredients being added and what each one does for your body. Make your kids a part of your exercise program and have fun with it.

This doesn’t have to be some strict food & fitness Nazi style parenting. My kids have snacks, but instead of ice cream I’ll give them frozen grapes, or they’ll make their own fruit concoctions.

Make it fun and develop a healthy household where people eat to live and aren’t living just to eat.

Fat Friends

This photo has always disgusted me, it was the beginning of my understanding of how far men have fallen.

This photo has always disgusted me, it was the beginning of my understanding of how far men have fallen.

People say you’re the result of those you keep close company with. Look at your friends, are they fit or are they fat?

Have you ever approached your fat friend or are you taking the, “They’re an adult, I don’t have any business or responsibility saying anything to them about their weight.” approach? Because I’m telling you right now, if any of the guys pictured above were my friend I would absolutely be talking to them about un-fucking their life.

What’s the worst that can happen, you lose a friend because you tell them they are going to destroy their life for no reason other than being gluttonous? Is losing someone who can’t take your advice/opinion really a friend in the first place?

I get it, we all want to be comfortable and just have a good fucking time, but these guys and girls who you call ‘friends’, their fat selves are going to start experiencing the pain of being fat and act like they don’t know why they’re sick, why they can’t get pregnant, why their joints hurt, why they can’t climb the mountain or jet-ski with you and your girl…

They’re going to suffer, and suffer, and suffer all because nobody has the fucking balls to tell them that all of their extra weight is killing them.

Grab your fucking balls and have that difficult conversation, if you lose the friendship then at least you know how weak it was in the first place.

Fat Pets

I focus on dogs as I’m a dog guy, insert whatever pet you have; the advice remains the same.

I don’t laugh when I see dogs that are fat as shit and have a hard time running around. I’m a ‘dog guy’, the photo above is my most loyal companion, the only thing in this world which loves me more than himself and I’ll never stop appreciating that.

When I see bulldogs or other dogs which have a stockier build I immediately look to see if the dog is being treated like he’s a frat brother. People think certain animals are supposed to be fat so they’ll feed them Cheetos, have them drink beer, and just treat the animal like it’s a fucking garbage disposal. They don’t exercise it regularly nor do they bring it anywhere to ‘experience’ the outdoors.

Your dog doesn’t need to be eating Blue Buffalo, but god damn, give some attention to what it’s funneling down its throat.

The same goes for exercise and ‘life experience’. Has your dog ever been to a lake, the ocean, a park, or the woods? If all it has seen is the block you walk around and your backyard, why the fuck do you have a pet?

This animal needs to burn energy; a tired dog is a happy dog.

I bring my dude places in the Jeep, sneak him to a lake we aren’t supposed to swim at, let him run the woods, and we get Target brand food. The best? Negative, but it’s better than the crap that you get for .99/lb we’ll also supplement his food with richer proteins & meat occasionally.

Ensure you’re setting the standard for everyone in your clan, too include your loyal companions.

I understand this is a sensitive subject, but when you look at the ‘big picture’ isn’t a little discomfort now, better than a big discomfort later when everyone realizes that maybe their isn’t health to be found at every size…

-Hunter

My writing is free, if you’d like to donate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life you may now do so by clicking the button below.
Donate


The Pride

Take Pride in You

Take Pride in You

 

Gentlemen, once you’ve  recognized the need to destroy The Void in your heart and eradicate the The Shame from your mind by reaching out to your brethren you can then experience something which has eluded your grasp for too long, a sense of pride.

Masculinity has been under attack for so long that most men now default to not taking pride in any attribute which may bring into question their support of the feminine imperative.

I’m here to tell you – Fuck. That.

As you go through the process of reclaiming your masculine nature you’ll eventually find yourself in a situation where you’re faced with the choice of vocalizing your masculine identity or continuing on with the facade (remaining a Clown).

Brothers, I’m telling you now, after you’ve face down those dark clouds and chose to stop repressing your genuine self, you deserve to take pride in the man you’ve created. 

Choosing the comfort of the lie is so easy; it’s so fucking easy to remain comfortable and to sit there and eat what you want, never get sore, and avoid all the discomfort out there in the world; it’s so damn easy. Yet, for whatever reason, you chose to find the comfort in the discomfort of reality. You’ve chosen to express your masculine nature when everyone around you wanted you to do the opposite. You chose to invest in you and live a life as the ‘real’ you vice the scripted you.

Take pride in that brother, you deserve it.

The whole world has told you the opposite. Our society has tried to snuff out that masculine fire since you were born and at some point maybe they didbut like the Phoenix, you chose to rise from the ashes, burning hotter than ever.

You’ve been told not to be a presence, but rather to make yourself meek and unimposing. You’ve been told to refrain from being aggressive, competitive, and lustful in any way. Women have told you to share feelings, your mother has told you to be a nice boy, and teachers have told you to sit still and your limitless energy is something you need to ‘get control over’.

This went on for years and for years you learned to default your decisions and behaviors to that of a man who fit the Mold and didn’t make waves, until now.

When you face that inevitable moment where you decide weak or strong, meek or masculine remember all of the days, weeks, and years where you chose the former and look where it’s gotten you.

You’ve gone long enough beating back your true nature, you’ve repressed your genuine self long enough. For possibly the first time in your life you now have someone telling you, take pride in being a man.

Own every aspect of that newfound sense of self and let the haters watch the show you’re about to put on. While you live, they’ll comment from the sideline. Before you know it you’ll have yourself in the arena and you’ll be laughing at the man in the stands saying the day is hot.

Embrace you and when the time comes, show the true you. Tell people, “No.” when that’s the answer. Stop trying to alleviate your decision or soften the blow by proving justifiers, tell someone No and then go about your business. Own every aspect of your masculinity take pride in:

  • Your sexuality. It’s OK to want sex, take pride in that lustful fire burning in your loins.
  • Your competitive & aggressive nature. You should want to win. I’ve gotten into physical fights over games of checkers and chess – fuck it, be in it to win it.
  • Your romantic nature. Men live hard, they also love hard and have very passionate feelings towards whatever they find of value. I lose sleep some nights because I can’t stop thinking of the men who fucking hate themselves and their lives. My wife asks why I’m not in bed and I tell her my mind is full. Sometimes I’ll share a little and ask her if she knows how I can get these men to just ‘wake up’ and recognize that they are their problem and they are also their solution. She tells me I worry too much about things I can’t control, but also that she is glad her man has a fire in his heart when so many are content and numb to feeling anything or caring enough to do anything about the things that do bother them.
  • Your desire to lead. My relationship isn’t 50/50 and I’ve said that to others, it blows their fucking mind when I say that I lead my marriage. Of course they turn to my girl and challenge my statement through her and she laughs saying she loves being able to enjoy the ride while I handle business. Of course there are areas where we come together, she is a responsible woman and she has on more than 10 occasions made the better decision than what I was going to make. I listen and if she’s right I adjust to her plan, still leading the venture. When we are dead-locked I make the final call, think of it as a 51-49 relationship. Embrace your own desire, you’re a man step up and lead, stop waiting for someone to take care of you.
  • Your sense of ‘Self’. You don’t need your wife’s permission to grow a beard or mustache. At the same time, you need to make sure you aren’t just going with the easiest ‘self’ you can create. Don’t walk around saying, “My real self plays video games all day, fuck what society and women want me to do.” You have a role to fill, there’s a reason I call this blog The Family Alpha. You’re the leader of your clan, you’ve got to set the standard from which all others will be measured. Be the true you, not the lazy you and at the same time, be the you that you want to be. I have a beard, my wife told me she wasn’t a ‘beard girl’, I grew my beard anyway and guess what, now she’s definitely a ‘beard girl’. Watch what women do, never follow what they say.

The world doesn’t have to love you, you have to love you. It’s time to stop hiding from yourself and way past due for you to stop hiding yourself from the world. Own your shit, take pride in who you are and what it is you plan to do in this life. Pursue your goals and live un-apologetically. There’s no reason to be sorry for being a man, there’s nothing wrong with embracing your masculinity.

The negative feelings you have towards behaving like a man are due entirely to socially constructed ‘rules’ which are set up to keep you contained. Break free brothers and let the whole fucking world know that you are here to win.

Own it.

Acta Non Verba,

-Hunter
My writing is free, if you’d like to compensate me for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life you may now do so by clicking the donate button below.


Donate


The Shame

You were supposed to be a King; it was never supposed to be like this.

You were supposed to be a King; it was never supposed to be like this.

I was recently asked how a guy who was ashamed to show his body was supposed to start hitting the gym. This guy was a father, husband, and man who truly wanted to reclaim his masculine ‘self’ yet was too embarrassed and ashamed to take that first step out into the world. Like Quasimodo who was more comfortable in his tower this man chose video games over social exposure because that was what kept him comfortable and safe.

This post is for the men who suffer that crippling fear of judgement; those self-defeating thoughts that they’re too fat, too ugly, and too weak to achieve what they see others achieving online, in movies, on Twitter, and all over the internet. Those guys can do it because they’re luckier, richer, had easier lives, etc…

These men know that the excuses they’re using to justify why others are taking action while they remain stagnant are total bullshit, but it soothes the wound to the ego temporarily and it buys them time to do something else to distract them from reality; Netflix, Video Games, Computer, Phone, etc…

These men fear venturing into the world because they fear being ostracized and they can get over that absolutely overwhelming and crushing shame in what their body & mind have become.

They let fear of judgement overcome desire to improve; to quote Mark Baxter, “Their level of disgust in themselves has yet to exceed the desire to do nothing”.

With permission I’m sharing a part of my email back to him:

It isn’t just your body which is weak, it’s your mind as well and that’s ok; because now you know you’ve got to pull your head out of your ass and start living. You aren’t getting a ‘re-do’ on life. My blog is just a bunch of words; it’s your application of them which I’m writing for. 

With all of this said, I won’t tell you to find motivation in your kids or your wife, I’m going to tell you to find motivation in yourself because if you don’t believe in you, then why should anyone else? If you don’t believe in you then why should those you are leading believe in themselves?

Your kids follow your example, not your advice – they see when you keep the shirt on and when you are ashamed of your body.

There’s been enough of that in your life; too many days, weeks, and years have been spent doing it that way.

It’ time for a change brother, own it. Start having a blast and who gives the slightest fuck if someone looks, comments, or whatever – become unshakable and own this life.” – Hunter

The Shame

Men are told that if they followed this set path of don’t make waves, be nice, and share their feelings that they’d ‘get the girl‘ and their life would be set. They’d be the King of their castle, their wife would submit to their lead, and their children would sit around them absorbing the aura of masculinity being let off by their father.

That’s not reality and more men are finding this out day by day.

I’ve made it a point to consistently push the message that lifting weights is the 1st step towards reclaiming your masculine nature. What I’ve failed to address is how does the man who does not currently have the confidence to show his body at the gym take this step?

Before I answer it’s important to place yourself inside the mind of the ashamed man. Try to look at the world through his perspective and if this seems eerily familiar, recognize that this may be you.

The men who recognize something is wrong are the ones who start looking for answers. They have a void in their heart and an incredible sense of self-hate growing; this leads them to turning to Google or some form of social media to figure out what the problem is. They’ll stumble across the Manosphere, The Red Pill, or Married Red Pill subreddit and read for hours, sometimes days.

They’ll come out of this journey awakened to the fact that:

  1. The comfortable world they’ve been living in is a lie & now they’re uncomfortable.
  2. They are the source of their problem; not the excuses they’ve used up to this point.
  3. They have to do more to achieve more; their life of ease has to be destroyed and that’s a difficult thing to let go of.

These men now know that they’ve got to take action. Every other post they read contains a variation of, “Do you even lift Bro?

The issue is, they don’t know how to lift. More importantly, they don’t have the confidence to go somewhere or the discipline/finances to do it alone at home.

Gentlemen, I’m telling you now, you’ve suffered long enough. How many more days, weeks, years are you going to be the man who:

  • Is at the beach wearing shirts, sitting on the towels or wading deep enough into the water so you can squat low enough to hide your body under the water?
  • Can’t run around with your kids because you can’t run?
  • Is trying to take up as little space possible and remain unnoticed when you attend parties or functions?
  • Only feels the slightest sense of relief when you’re eating and at home yet when you’re done and see the empty soda bottles and pizza boxes feel disgust and more self-hate than you did before?
  • Cries when in the shower, driving home from work, or when you’re in bed next to your woman who won’t even consider touching your dick?
  • Contemplates suicide or eating yourself into an early grave while hiding in your ‘safe’ cave at home?

I get it brother, you feel those black clouds will forever hide that light you once felt as a young man; that masculine fire which burned so hot when you had passion for life has been snuffed out.

I’m telling you now, so long as you don’t give up on you, there is still hope for you to rise from the ashes like a Phoenix. You have to act, you have to look deep inside one more time and give your masculine self one more shot. Except this time you have the words of Hunter Drew giving you fuel, telling you to Burn your motherfucking ship on the shore as there is no retreat, you’re going all in this time.

No longer will you eat to feel comfortable, no longer will you masturbate when your wife goes to the store, no longer will you sit while your child runs…

The shame you carry runs to your core. That’s how deep change is going to have to happen. Layer by layer you’re going to have to strip away the ‘make-up’ you’ve been putting over your true self. You’re going to have to stop living like a clown and start living like a genuine man.

When that raw genuine masculine skin first hits the surface it’s going to burn. Your friends and family are going to shit test you, your wife is going to think this is just another one of your attempts to ‘man up’ just like last New Year’s, your muscles will hurt from use and your mind will hurt from withdrawals from the sugar, porn, and other toxins that will eventually clear out.

What actions do you have to take to turn life around, reclaim your masculine nature, and develop a genuine sense of self before you’re able to hit the weights?

It starts with a conversation. It starts with taking the action of sending a message to an individual whom you connect with. Maybe you email me, maybe you email another member on the Manosphere, but you have to start the process by simply taking the action of giving enough of a shit about yourself that you swallow your pride, kill your ego, and reach out for help.

From there, you have to listen. That person, if they’re willing, is going to give you advice on how they succeeded. You’ll set goals, you’ll be held accountable, and there will be expectations that you uphold your end of the bargain.

Time is the most valuable asset we have, the masculine man you find worthy of filling the role of ‘mentor’ will not dedicate his time to a man who does not truly above all else, want to reclaim his life.

Be that man and burn the ship, it’s now or never brother.

Reach out and rid yourself of the shame that has plagued you for too long.

-Hunter
My writing is free, if you’d like to compensate me for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life you may now do so by clicking the donate button below.


Donate


Masculine Model #2 – Conor McGregor

In the first edition of this series I chose General Mattis (Read it here) as the best masculine role model out there. If you know anything of the man then you’re completely aware that the man embodies all of the traits a masculine man has.

In this post and from here on out I’m going to choose men who embody specific traits of the masculine male. I’m going to provide real men, not fictional characters who may set an example from which you can apply to your own life. The goal is to fight back against the Homer Simpsons, Peter Griffins, and Phil Dunphys out there.

In keeping with the tradition of this blog, I’m going to set irrational confidence as the first trait specific role model. In my post Lifting is the 1st step towards reclaiming your masculinity I touch on the fact that lifting weights isn’t solely for physical health but rather it facilitates mental growth as well as developing irrational and limitless levels of self-confidence.

Gentlemen, if you are looking to get the most from this life then you need to exhibit this common traits shared amongst the most successful and masculine men out there.

Confidence

When you believe in you, it makes no difference if anyone else does.

When you believe in you, it makes no difference if anyone else does.

Irrational levels of self-confidence are crucial to the reclamation of your masculine self. This blog is mainly read by men who, for whatever reason, have fallen off the track of masculinity and are now working to find themselves again.

So I say, to the men who’ve grown their dadbod, gone months without sex, or maybe are just single and reading this to avoid any mistakes when getting into a long-term relationship you have to believe in you.

If you’re going to express your masculinity and no longer repress it then you’ve got to believe in yourself and you’ve got to believe, 100% that you are capable of doing this. The only way you can become the man you were meant to be is to commit every fiber of your being to this action. You do it by burning your ship as there is no going back.

Conor McGregor needed food stamps to eat before his UFC debut in Sweden (where he earned a bonus of $60,000 for the Knockout of the Night) this man went into that ring knowing he had shot to make a lasting first impression. After 67 seconds he had the knockout of the night, a Win, and the attention of Dana White.

This post isn’t about covering his career, it’s about showing you that you too must cultivate that same mindset when you go into everything. 

Each post I write I take on as my only shot to captivate my reader. This article is my only article some people will read, I want it to make an impact. I want to knock people out with my words and have them coming back for more, improving their own life every time they read what I have to say.

Commitment to Self & Belief in Ability to Win

Life is a game, play to Win.

Life is a game, play to Win.

This life isn’t about simply existing; it’s about finding purpose, passion, and living a life filled with plenty of Polaroids. This game of life is all you’ve got, so play to Win. Don’t be content with the meager slice society has told you to appreciate, take as much as you want as often as you want.

Men are told to take single mothers, fat women, and sexless prudes and to then shut up and be happy because. 

Most men do, and they fucking hate themselves for the rest of their life.

Take responsibility for your life, then take action as it is action, not words which leads to change and reclamation of self; Acta, Non Verba…

Don’t go into anything half-assed, commit yourself to actually giving enough of a shit to trying harder. Can you honestly look at yourself in the mirror and say you’re trying your hardest? I doubt it as very few can.

So, start trying harder. Start making the decisions which make you a little uncomfortable, a little sore, lose a little sleep, etc.

Start implementing some intentional discomfort into your life so you stop being so damn cozy all of the time.

Total Dedication to Mission

What is your purpose? What is your passion? Find it, then own it with your all.

What is your purpose? What is your passion? Find it, then own it with your all.

MMA is Conor McGregor’s passion, his purpose and he does not let anything get in-between him and his mission in life.

You must foster this same sense of commitment in yourself.

You must have a mission in this life and your mission must not be your woman or kids. This is about the self that masculine power which is currently dormant inside your body. Wake it up, light that fire, then begin to pursue your mission.

People may say, “Well Conor McGregor doesn’t have a family to worry about.” and they’re right.

Family men do have lives they’re responsible for, I still don’t give a shit about your weak excuse to justify your mediocre performance up to this point. Stop using your family as a burden and start viewing them as fuel. They will follow your lead, so show them what a masculine man is capable of. Lead your family while writing your book, lifting your weights, and pursuing your mission. Find a way to balance them all, then execute.

Conor McGregor’s Traits

Confidence in Self: Mr. McGregor believes in Mr. McGregor, whether you do or not is something he doesn’t giving the slightest of fucks about. Don’t be the guy who says he ‘cocky’ to others or to gain favor with women. You should view that as a trait you want to wrap yourself up in and foster in your own environment. Do your thing, who gives a fuck if your neighbor ‘Steve’ thinks you doing kettlebell looks weird, you do you.

No Reservation: Conor has burned his ship on the shore, there is no retreat. You must do the same. Stop sitting on the fence as to whether you’re going to go ‘all-in’ with what I’m advising on this blog or what you’ve read on The Red Pill. Do or don’t, but stop pussy footing around making a decision and commit like a masculine man should.

Dedication to Mission: Commitment to the craft of Mixed Martial Arts is Conor McGregor’s calling, what is your’s? If you don’t know what your mission is, then why are you taking the actions you’re taking? You’ve got to step back and figure out who you are as a man and what it is you want from this life.

Do it sooner rather than later because the time is ticking and day by day you’ll have one less action you’ll be capable of performing.

-Hunter

I write for free, if you’d like to compensate me for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life you may do so through clicking the donate button below.
Donate

Excuses

Stop making excuses as to why you're wasting your time before it runs out.

Stop making excuses as to why you’re wasting your time before it runs out.

The saying goes, “Excuses are like assholes, everyone has one and they all stink.

This is something I’d like you to recognize and truly wrap your mind around. Everyone makes an excuse as to why they can’t do the things they need to do. Only a very select few people out there are making excuses to do the things they need to do.

Ask yourself these questions and see if you can come up with an answer that isn’t complete bullshit which you know to be a lie you tell yourself to justify mediocre performance.

  1. What excuse do you have for not gaming your wife these past few years? Why don’t you treat her like a lover anymore yet expect her to act like one?
  2. What excuse do you have for plugging your kids in front of a screen day after day; refusing to put your phone away and educate, play with, or lead them?
  3. What excuse do you have for the weight you’ve put on?
  4. What’s your excuse for giving your time and attention to those who are not worthy; hanging with deadbeat friends who do nothing but complain and waste your time with booze or pot?
  5. What excuse do you have for how weak you have become physically, spiritually, & mentally?
  6. What is your excuse for all of the times you didn’t speak up and tell the world how you truly felt because you’d rather play it safe and not make waves; making yourself like everyone else in an attempt to be accepted by them?
  7. What’s your excuse for putting everyone ahead of yourself?
  8. What’s your excuse for letting society tell you what you should like, how you should act, and what you should accept?
  9. What’s your excuse for rewarding failure time and again?
  10. What excuse do you have for repressing your masculine nature?

People will make an excuse as to why they didn’t go to the gym, yet the winners out there are making excuses to go to the gym.

When is the last time you said, “Hey man I’m going to be late to your (insert event) because I need to hit the gym.”? When is the last time you made the decision to not go to bed but rather stay up late because you had to knock some project out?

The issue we have is that of too much comfort and too little appreciation of time.

Comfort

People have become so fucking comfortable that they’d rather suffer a mediocre existence than put in the slightest effort required for improvement. People choose to complain and seek validation through those complaints instead of just shutting the fuck up and putting in the work.

I had a husband email me talking about how his wife refuses to follow his lead and that they have a deadbedroom. I found out he was fat. I asked him why he thought his wife would want to fuck a fat dude. He went on to explain through 6 paragraphs how a knee injury from high school football (when he was really cut and strong of course) prevented him from lifting weights, running, etc.

I’m 4 classes away from my MS in Exercise Science, I was able to call BS on this one fairly quickly. He was upset about that and hasn’t responded since.

Instead of complaining about the problems you have in your life, start working to solve them.

Stop being so comfortable sitting on your couch talking about how the world is holding you down, you are holding you down – get up!

Stand up and start doing.

I know it’s cold, I know you’re tired, I know life isn’t easy I’m living it too. I have a full time job, am a full time student, father of 2, husband, blogger, and I workout – I fucking get it. But here’s the secret, I don’t talk about my problems, I just solve them and that’s why I’m able to do 4x as much as you with my 24 hours vice your 24 hours.

Stop going to bed early after watching TV shows for hours on Netflix. No, you don’t deserve that break and if you did, you wouldn’t be asking or convincing yourself, you’d know.

Stop being fat

Stop being lazy

Stop being weak

Stop being so god damned comfortable all the time, implement some Intentional Discomfort into your life.

You need to feel the pain of work and effort, you need to find comfort in the discomfort of living life as a masculine man

Time

Guys think they have all the time in the world to unfuck their situation. The fat say they’ll workout tomorrow, the poor say they’ll grind tomorrow, the weak say they’ll improve tomorrow.

What if tomorrow never comes?

Social media & technology have made people lose their appreciation of time. Time should be the single most cherished commodity we have in life as it is the most limited aspect of being alive. You never know when your string of life is going to finally unravel from the spool, yet people are living as though there’s no end in sight.

Time is like an angel – beautiful beyond measure & flying high. When people try to capture time, what they are doing is they’re grabbing the angel and cutting off its wings.

When you’re ‘capturing’ the moment on Facebook, not enjoying yourself but rather trying to promote yourself and show the world how great you are, you’re destroying the beauty of time, you’re destroying that moment.

When you say you’ll start your diet tomorrow, what you’re doing is you’re saying tomorrow is guaranteed and with that mindset you’re destroying the beauty of how short our lives really are.

Start living like you’re going to die, because you are. Start taking action in the now because tomorrow is never guaranteed to come for you. When you start living like your time on this Earth is limited, you’ll stop making excuses for your mediocre existence and instead will start living the life you want.

When you stop trying to capture and devalue time you’ll be able to recognize the beauty of it as it flies high with its wing. Enjoy that moment, stop trying to capture it. Immerse in watching that brief flight, before you know it it will be over and you’ll be the better person for watching the angel fly than you would if you were to just hold its lifeless and wingless body.

The time is going to pass either way and you are going to die, you might as well live.
Hunter

I write for free, if you’d like to compensate me for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life you may do so through clicking the donate button which will send funds to my PayPal.

Donate

Creator of Life

When I had kids I knew my life had changed forever - I was fucking pumped.

When I had kids I knew my life had changed forever – I was fucking pumped.

This is a continuation of my Burden of Family post.

A friend of mine, the creator of the blog Unlocking the Crown recently returned home after his wife delivered triplets. We spoke a few times while his wife was sleeping still in the hospital and I could feel the masculine energy flowing through him. Here he was riding on X minutes of sleep, taking care of his wife, 3 babies, and everything else required to make the transition from hospital to home go as smooth as possible and when we spoke it was like it was just another fucking day.

Aside from my wife, he’s the only person who knows of my blog in my ‘real’ life. So, naturally we touched on the subject of masculinity and fatherhood. During the discussion he said something which inspired this post, he said is isn’t hard managing all of this because these are his kids and that’s his wife, and he was a part of making this happen.

Complete ownership. If you’re going to have kids then you’re going to have to fill the role required of you when the kids show up.

If you’re a father then you played a role in creating life and that means something. No matter how awesome or awkward and uncomfortable the sex was, you had it and a baby was the result. I don’t care if it’s with your wife or with a one night stand; if you played a role in creating a life, then you need to assume the responsibilities that come with the title Father.

You’re poor?  I don’t care.

You’re Young? I don’t care.

You’re really busy? I don’t care.

You didn’t want it? I. Don’t. Care.

You see, as a father I understand the magnitude that comes with raising a life in this day and age. I have two children, a 7 year old boy and a 4 year old girl and both are in the process of becoming productive, educated, intelligent, good members of our society.

I became a father because my wife and I chose to have a kid, then we did. We made the decision again, and had another; now we’re good.

There is no difference between what is expected of me, a 29 year old married man and the 16 year old boy who just knocked up his freshman sweetheart.

You do your fucking best. You remain as present as you can and you provide the necessities. If the mother wants to be a bitch about it then you get legal documentation which clearly draws the boundaries for time, supervision, requirements, etc.

I don’t live in a fantasy world where kids aren’t having unprotected sex, I know that it’s going to happen, I know right now some kid is hitting it raw dog and doesn’t know enough to pull out because it feels to good and in September he’s going to see a ball of flesh coming out of where he was cumming in.

My aim with this blog isn’t to fight teen sex; part of my goal with this blog is to provide a resource that will raise the standard of men who will then act as an example for the young men in their life. If you act like a masculine man then the boys around you will act like and become masculine men. When they purposefully or accidentally have a child, they’ll act as a masculine man does – complete ownership.

Single Gents

You don't need a Queen to be a King. You don't need a wife to be a father.

You don’t need a Queen to be a King. You don’t need a wife to be a father.

Had sex with the girlfriend or or one night stand and got her pregnant? She (you both) decided to keep the baby?

Cool, it’s dad time.

*Do not think that because you got this woman pregnant that now you have to marry her.

If it was a one night stand, you need to let her know to keep you in the loop. Maybe you’ll try and go steady and figure a way to become an LTR or maybe you’ll just stay in touch over baby things. Both are acceptable options, the key point is you need to know what’s going on with the baby. 

For the one night stand or girlfriends alike, ensure you’re aware of doctor’s appointments, any complications, preparations for where the baby will live, getting stuff together for the arrival, planning for names, etc. You’re a part of all of this and the best thing you can do is remain civil with this woman. You may not know her at all, start discussing family history, finances, plans, etc.

Don’t kick this can down the road even once, start having the conversations early and often. Keep her on Team You the last thing you need is this chick disappearing or turning against you.

Once the baby has arrived, make yourself a part of it’s upbringing. If that means every other week or whatever so be it, but make yourself a part of this child’s life from the onset and continue to do so throughout all the years.

Married Dad-Bod Beta Schlups

Fuck the Dad Bod - I fucking hate it and hate the men who make the population I am a part of (fathers) look like pathetic pussies.

Fuck the Dad Bod – I fucking hate it and hate the men who make the population I am a part of (fathers) look like pathetic pussies.

You’re the group that really needs the most work. I’ve seen fat, disgusting, weak dads ‘being one of the girls’ with the other moms at the football, baseball, and soccer games and practices I have led.

Understand this now, your child is going to follow your example not your advice.

Being out of shape, trying to keep up with the trends of society, having no hobbies other than sedentary TV time – is that what you want for your kid?

Your dead-bedroom or 1x a week sex life is pathetic, your wardrobe is pathetic, you aren’t happy even though you try to convince yourself you are, and your physical limitations due to poor health choices have you unable to raise your kids to becoming healthy productive embers of society.

When you have kids, you’ve removed ‘Zero Days’ from your life. You need to be the example from which they will measure their performance physically, educationally, spiritually, etc. Being a fat slob tells your kids that when they get married or have kids that they should get fat too.

Start trying again, get back to giving a fuck about life. Treat your wife like you did when she was your girlfriend, treat your children as pupils who you’ve got to to train for life, and treat yourself as an ever improving project that always has an aspect tat needs to be work on, honed, and improved.

Masculine Men

Lead your children through life

Lead your children through life

You’re on your game, you’re following your mission, you look good, sex is great, life is solid, and you’re pursuing improvement both personally and professionally.

The biggest concern I have with my fellow masculine brethren is that they get too Mission Focused grinding day in and day out to improve and raise their standard that they don’t make ‘family’ time a slot in their schedule.

Men grind day in and day out, trying to build their side hustle to something more. But, at what expense?

You can’t put your family before your mission, at the same time you’ve got to make time for them. Steve Jobs is an excellent example of this. The dude could have made his family a part of his mission and it probably would have benefiited him and improved his leadership skills. Instead, he disowned his daughter as she was an inconvenience to his pursuit of Apple greatness.

You need to follow your mission in life, but when you become a father you need to look at the opportunity cost and recognize that the time you invest in your child is not wasted time.

Make them a part of your mission and you’ll find it leads to you becoming even more efficient at leading your family. Get them on-board your plan and share your vision with them, let them see the how and why you do what you do.

When they understand why you grind you’ll find that they support you and defend you from others. Your kids will say my dad’s not here because he’s working on X. Or your wife will say, when some bitch tries making a remark on your absence, that at least her man has passion in life and is pursuing dreams.

They’ll support you if you make them a part of the greatness you’re chasing.

All Dads

Fill your role

Fill your role

There are too many children out there who don’t have a masculine father figure in their life. Having a blue pill ‘plugged in’ father is better than nothing, but a child will reach the fullest development when they are raised by the balance of the masculine and feminine.

Fill your role, be the child’s shield and spear, protecting it from the world while fighting off all who threaten it’s existence.

Similar to being in shape, 90% of the battle is just showing up. Show up, you’ll figure the rest out as you go. Keep piece with the mother and if that isn’t going to work then legally ensure your rights are represented and documented.

This child needs you, it’s time to step up brother.

Hunter

I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

Donate

Negative Visualizations

When I was 5 years old my mother committed suicide. This left my father to raise me and my 3 year old twin brother/sister on his own. My dad was a Navy man; always in and out then deploying. He needed a caretaker so we went to live with my grandmother.

She was a strict woman who lived through the Great Depression. As I grew up she instilled discipline, a ‘never quit’ work ethic, and appreciation. It’s the appreciation aspect I’m writing about in this post, as losing my mother and not having a father around combined with the instruction from my Grandmother created a man who has learned to truly immerse in and appreciate each moment.

The Red Pill introduced me to Stoicism and Stoicism introduced me to Negative Visualizations. Negative Visualizations was a mental tool I naturally developed, but learning it had a name enables me to relay the message a little more clearly to others.

I start every morning by waking up and taking a moment to think on and inventory my life. I do this through performing negative visualizations immediately after waking up. I visualize that my wife and kids die on this day. I let the pain fully wash over me, I feel it in my heart, my mind, and my entire ‘self’. Then, I slowly bring myself back, I dial my mind in and remind myself that my wife is next to me, breathing softly, beautiful as ever. I remind myself that my kids are asleep in their beds, innocent, pure, and alive.

I get out of bed, do the morning routine, and before I leave I always tell my wife and kids that I love them, because I do and I’m aware of how lucky I am to still have them in my life. Kissing your child’s forehead means more when you know it could be the last time.

I appreciate each moment with them more because I’ve made myself feel the pain of losing their presence in my life.

Life is not guaranteed, yet people live as though they have all the time in the world.

In my post Intentional Discomfort I wrote about removing comforts from your life so you truly appreciate them. Warm water, your phone, your bed, etc.

It isn’t practical to ‘remove your wife and kids’ so you have to do it through a sort of ‘thought experiment’. Remove them in your mind, remove their smells, their smiles, their voices and laughs, all of them. Immerse in the void you create in your heart, soak in the abyss and feel the pain. Now, bring them back to life. 

Tell me that this doesn’t make you smile just a little bit more when you see them. Tell me that it doesn’t make you want to put the phone down and get on the floor with your kid and play.

We’re so caught up in the hustle of modern living that we are getting distracted from what matters most, the time we have with those we love.

This goes beyond family; I perform negative visualizations with every day life. I’ve visualized my wife cheating, I’ve visualized being doxxed, I’ve visualized getting fired, I’ve visualized crashing my Jeep, etc.

This prepares me for the moment when something does happen I’m not caught off guard, unable to cope or perform. I’ll have a rough game plan as to what I need to do because I’ve already played it out in my mind.

Don’t get it twisted, I don’t mope around all day thinking of terrible things that could happen. Just recognize that you should periodically immerse in a shitty scenario and ensure you’ve got the fortitude to not only handle it but rather come out on top.

I love my wife, if she were to cheat I’m ready for it and will survive.

I love my children to death, but if they were to die I’ll know I gave them everything and that I was in all of our moments together.

I’ll go to my deathbed without regret because I make sure I appreciate the moments I have with those I love. I Hang my Polaroids and I prepare myself mentally to react to the chaos that we call life.

The ancient Stoics had it right, if you’d like to read more on Stoicism here are my recommendations:

 Letters From a Stoic: Seneca

 Marcus Aurelius: Meditations

The Discourses of Epictetus

 The Enchiridion: Epictetus (Shortened version of Discourses)

 A Guide to the Good Life: William Braxton Irvine

 The Obstacle is the Way: Ryan Holiday

I’ve read all of these books and each has added to my ‘mental toolbox’. We need to remind ourselves that we need to be as equally strong in our mind as we are in our body.

Developing this mental strength requires training and negative visualizations are one such exercise which will lead to a stronger, more fortified masculine mind.

Hunter

You can now support The Family Alpha for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life.


Donate


Smiling in the Rubble.

You're a Masculine man, a King, do not give your crown away for anything

You’re a Masculine man, a King, do not give your crown away for anything

I used to have a photo from my first deployment where I was covered in nastiness and I had the biggest, most stupid smile on. I tell most people I was smiling so much, while covered in ‘stuff’ because I’d been up for over 48hrs working hard and I was delirious. The real reason, the one I only share with my brothers, is that I was genuinely happy because it was hard and because I had won.

This is something about men that women will never truly understand and they’ll never be able to replicate or achieve; the ability to Smile in Rubble.

The female imperative has made it perfectly clear that anything masculine is to either become inclusive and accommodating to women or it is subject to ridicule and attack. Look what has happened to men only barbers, combat jobs in the military, and professional sports.

It goes way beyond that, men (and the boys who will become the next generation of men) are being told beards, muscles, aggression, and sexual desire are ‘negative’ attributes which must be repressed. They’ve streamlined this to indoctrinating baby boys to be gender fluid, telling parents they’re wrong to choose blue for boy & pink for girl (a real conversation I had when my wife was pregnant with my daughter).

They’re also trying to kill man’s ability to be happy when he has lost everything. Nothing takes the wind out of a woman’s sails faster than taking away her external validation & feelings. The beauty of it is, men are not only capable of being happy in the middle of destruction but we’re also stubborn in the face of death (Giles Corey) and capable of humor during torture (Saint Lawrence) feminazis fucking hate this.

Men, this post is to remind you that no matter what the fuck is going on in your life, you’re good. The best course of action is to let that masculine smile flash and for you to completely nothing the person who did you wrong. Don’t hold hate, regret, or contempt for them; become completely apathetic.

There will be anger and I want you to fucking bathe in it. This anger will not only serve as fuel for growth, but also as your reminder to never let your guard down again. You can have an LTR without oneitis, and you can have your marriage without a deadbedroom, you can have whatever you want without having to sacrifice your masculinity. If you take on any of those ventures, your anger at your former self will keep you on the straight and narrow.

These categories are but a few examples of how you can deal with a shitty situation like a masculine man without losing face or giving your ‘enemy’ what they want. Remember, this isn’t about instant gratification, it’s about maximizing the standard of your life.

Cheating

Guys get depressed when their woman cheats; that’s exactly what she wants from him.

You know what would driver her insane?

The path a masculine man would take, which is to smile and say, “alright, so this is how we end”. He’d then start doing his own thing, hooking up with a new chick before the end of the next week.

Let her hamster away at why this doesn’t have you distraught, in tears, and trying to get over it and work it out. She’s the greatest thing alive right? (See: Solipsism)

Take that power from her by smiling, getting her shit packed nice & neat, and getting her the fuck out of your life for good. Once she has moved out or fully aware that you’ve broken up you don’t go out of your way for her to see your success and happiness. You need to just genuinely be happy and out there pursuing life without any regard to her, she’ll find out one way or another.

When she approaches or tries to reclaim a spot in your life, be indifferent. Let her know, “It’s nice seeing you, but I’ve got something to do.” then leave – because you do have shit to do and make sure you’re smiling when you inform her of that.

Divorce

To the guys who get divorced and are losing half their cash & assets in the process, don’t let it get you down for more than a day. You’re a fucking man and you need to act like it. The time is going to pass either way, why spend it angry when you could spend it grinding and focusing on how you’re going to rebuild your empire?

I’m not saying don’t feel, if my wife cheated I’d be fucking pissed, but only for a day. I firmly believe in giving yourself one 24hr window to grieve. Death, betrayal, etc. you get one day to rage then it’s done, back to the grind.

Men smile when they're wet, cold, tired, and afraid - it's what we do.

Men smile when they’re wet, cold, tired, and afraid – it’s what we do.

If you had kids together, sharing them will suck as you’re getting ripped from their life. There is going to be a primal beastly rage in your heart that will only be extinguished once you destroy the world. But, that is a problem for you to control inside yourself through lifting, meditation in motion, and talking it out with your dog. The kids need to be shielded from this as much as possible.

You know what would be best for them?

If you, their masculine dad, showed them that even when life throws curveballs and things don’t work out the way we planned, we still have to fill our role and pursue life.

This means you’ve got to be doing whatever it is that you genuinely want to do. You no longer have a wife and every other week you don’t have kids. This is a lot of time that’s opened up in your schedule; use it to hustle, rebuild your cash, and rebuild your sense of ‘self’. Show your kids that their father is a masculine man who acts as the example for his children to follow.

Regardless of your relationship status, your identity as a masculine man does not change.

Betrayal

This is one of the hardest, this is when someone you trusted takes deliberate action against you. I covered infidelity already so with this, think more along the lines of a business partner making a side deal and eliminating you from your own company(Eduardo Saverin), or a friend telling a lie to get themselves promoted ahead of you, or a step-parent excluding you, the biological child of the other parent from any inheritance.

In all of these situations you need to recognize that people acted in accordance with how people act. Friends and family have been stabbing each other in the back for thousands of years. The best way to respond, with a fucking smile and nod of the head acknowledging Ok, that’s how it is now.

There’s no need to rage, plot vengeance, or plan ways to show them beause FUCK them. They are nothing and you need to nothing them. Remove them from your life and when their money runs out, or their plan doesn’t follow the intended path and they come slinking back to you, smile and say, “It’s nice seeing you, but I’ve got something to do.”

Men have found comfort in the discomfort, embracing the suck and moving forward.

Men have found comfort in the discomfort, embracing the suck and moving forward.

Gentlemen, you’ve  got to embrace the harsh reality in which we live. Find comfort in the discomfort and recognize that you don’t need anyone in this life.

We have so few breaths on this planet, don’t spend a single one giving your happiness away. You’ve been taught to mope, you’ve been taught that it takes X months to recover from X years of a relationship.

Toss that bullshit out, you know who told you that? Our weak society.

Stop follow the path they’ve set for you, break the mold and live the rest of your days like a man.

Now smile, you’ve got something to go do.

Hunter

I write for free, if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life you may do so through clicking the donate button which will send funds to my PayPal.

Donate

Meditation in Motion

You've got to get your mind under control or it will wreak havoc.

You’ve got to get your mind under control or it will wreak havoc.

Many readers on the Manosphere keep asking the same questions and a lot of writers keep providing the same answers with their unique take here and there.

Guys unplug and then they’ll say, “I don’t know what to do”.

They are angry yet they aren’t quite sure at whom or what specifically it is that angers them.

These guys say they don’t know where to direct their anger or how to just not be angry.

They also want to know what specifically they are supposed to be doing now that they’ve gotten a taste of reality and are beginning to see the strings controlling the system.

To the gentlemen who find themselves in this group, this one is for you.

Meditation in Motion is something I came up with before I started The Family Alpha blog. It was the discovery that when I wasn’t writing, lifting, and doing I felt like shit. I started to pay attention to this and I came to the realization that it was in the movement that I found myself most ‘at peace’ with who I was as a man and where I was in my life.

I’ve tried the whole sitting, breathing into my stomach, and counting breaths to help clear the mind. It just wasn’t my thing, I kept thinking of the other things I wanted to do.

Notice I said things I wanted to do; I’m not a victim of the ‘go-go-go’ mindset which plagues many men in our modern society. I don’t always think of stuff I have to do, which would be the result of a stressful mind. Instead, I take time to fully immerse in each moment; I now notice shit as simple as a breeze, the color of trees, etc.

I would sit, do nothing but try to ‘meditate’ and I just couldn’t stop thinking about the post I wanted to write, the book I’d like to read, whatever; there was something productive I wanted to do besides find ‘Zen’.

I’ve since come to the conclusion that not as many people give a shit about reaching enlightenment as people think. It’s the same as the cold showers, stoicism, etc. People hold these as doctrine. Fuck it, periodically throw a cold shower in the mix, and once in a while let your emotions flare to the surface. Some people find peace sitting and listening to bells, most don’t and to that crowd I’ve got a solution.

Fuck the enlightenment, we need to recognize that men want to find peace within their mind & body.

There is a connection between the mind and body; if both aren’t in sync and properly trained you’re going to have an imbalance. Lifting trains both, implementing intentional discomforts occasionally will train both, and reading keeps the mind sharp. All of these must occur for the strongest foundation of ‘self’ to be developed.

So what are you supposed to do to achieve greater insight and control over ‘self’ without sitting and breathing in a silent room?

MOVE

Just get yourself in motion; whatever that means to you is what you’re supposed to do.

For some men that means signing up to a gym or purchasing home gym equipment and getting at it in their home. Others may start taking care of projects around their house which has been neglected. Some may find that it just means getting out without their wife as they don’t have any friends or hobbies. You can also:

  • Go for a Walk
  • Go for a run
  • Drive to an empty parking lot and read
  • Start writing
  • Start taking photos
  • Start attending a class on anything at your local library or community college

Just start doing something which puts your body & mind into motion. It is in the action that you will begin to release the anger, release the tension, release the stress, release the fear, release the regret, release the pain, and replace it with your masculine powerful self.

Notice, none of the recommended actions include your wife. This post is for fixing the minds of the newly unplugged as well as the guys who are stuck in the anger stage. You need to take the actions, free from your wife as they have nothing to do with her.

I’m not telling you to lead her, not telling you to game her, I’m not telling you to do a fucking thing with her as that requires control, a clear mind, and Machiavellian perception which you are unable to master while your mind is a mess.

Skip all of that bullshit and just simply focus on you doing something.

You will find that during your runs you are talking to yourself in your head. While you’re taking photos you’re also thinking about that thing you said or did.

While in motion you are meditating and de-fragmenting your mind and you don’t even know it. Taking these actions and putting yourself into motion will lead to you becoming more effective and efficient at uncovering who you are as a man. Once you know who your ‘self’ is, you can then release the anger as well as knowing exactly what it is you want to do in this life and how you’re going to do it.

I follow this same advice when writing. When I write I light a candle near me (I’ve got one lit next to me right now), when I get stuck on a point, description, or phrasing I’ll look into the flame. My eyes are looking at the fire, but the distraction from the screen allows my mind to free itself and look at the problem from every perspective; it frees the mind to break the constraints it is under when I am focusing its energy.

Get your 'self' in motion, the time is going to pass either way; you might as well do something.

Get your ‘self’ in motion, the time is going to pass either way; you might as well do something.

That dancing fire frees my mind; this is a micro version of what I’m recommending as I’m focusing on writing. What I recommend to you is a much larger action than looking at a flame. This is your life and a much bigger aspect of your ‘self’, movement is the macro version of this.

Another personal example is that during my hour commute to and from work, I keep the radio off. I use that time to just think and let my mind wander as far as it can while still being able to drive. Stop wasting time listening to the same 10 songs on the radio, it’s time that could be used to dial yourself in, preventing any mental health complications or feelings of being ‘overloaded’ from developing.

You may get wicked pissed that your wife won’t submit & follow your lead or fuck you like you want her to. Don’t get mad or angry and don’t storm out of the house, simply recognize the situation for what it is and when it’s time for you to get into motion you’ll see that you’re better able to elevate yourself over the situation and seeing the entire ‘field of battle’. You’ll see where you fucked up, where you said too much or too little, and you’ll come up for a game plan to implement the next time this scenario arises.

If you were to just sit and stew over it, not moving but just sitting and reading TRP/MRP/the ‘sphere you’ll twist yourself up and achieve nothing but increased agitation. Kill the redundancy without progress.

When you return home from being in motion, your mind is clear and you no longer give a fuck about whatever the hell had transpired. Your lady may try to bait you back in but at this point, you’ve ‘meditated while in motion’ and no longer give a fuck. Not in the childish manner of playing silent, no – you truly don’t give a shit about it anymore. So, just maintain frame and move forward.

Now, apply this to all of your activities. Whatever it is that you are doing, immerse yourself in it and make every action a moment to ‘meditate’. Your body & mind will always be on point as you are intentionally keeping them both moving forward. Similar to the way you don’t drink stagnate water, you don’t thrive with a stagnant body & mind.

The answer to all of the questions concerning what you’re ‘supposed’ to do when you discover the Manosphere and unplug, is move.

Get up and start doing shit and don’t stop doing shit until you die.

You don’t deserve a break, you haven’t done enough, it is your job to lead, the burden of performance will always be on you whether you’re married, single, MGTOW, whatever.

Embrace that and move, the anger should dissipate and a genuine don’t give a fuck mindset should take its place.

Get moving brothers,

Hunter

I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

Donate

Give your ‘self’ a gift.

Fix your 'self' & it will fix your entire family.

Fix your ‘self’ & it will fix your entire family.

This post is about giving something to your ‘self’ this holiday season. This something isn’t of material value; it goes way beyond a new Jeep, gun, or tool. What I want you to give yourself this holiday season is the Gift of Independence.

I want you to shift your perspective on life to the point where you know that if your wife were to cheat or file for divorce you’d still have a smile on your facing knowing that you are the fucking man.

There’s no better time than today for you to start pulling the training wheels you have in your life. For the ‘plugged in’ married man it’s their wife and marriage that are the two wheels which keep them balanced. These men feel their masculinity and position in society is derived from their relationship status, as if being married signifies they are real men. This is unacceptable.

Take a look at the masculine man, he’s riding his life free from support.

The man who has embraced his masculinity is the guy who has a mission and it’s not his wife. He’s the guy who has a wife that knows her man’s vision and she is aware that he does not need her. Have you ever noticed that the men who don’t need their woman are the men who have the most loyal women?

The reason for this should be clear, but for those just tuning in to the Manosphere women want a man who doesn’t need her to take care of him. Women will submit to a masculine man as she is his lover and she knows that he will elevate her status in society while he pursues his mission.

Men who need their women are men who treat their wife like their mommy. Women want a man who can ravish them then continue marching towards whatever goal they have set. They don’t want to have to raise a man-child. My wife and I have two kids together, the last thing she needs is a third body to raise. Because I keep her in the role of lover, our marriage is still enjoyable and filled with passion. If I were to be the doting fool that most men have become, she’d resent me and either find another man who could treat her like a woman or she’d lower her standards to becoming a bitter hag.

The Christmas season is upon us, give your entire family a gift by raising your personal standard as their leader.

The Christmas season is upon us, give your entire family a gift by raising your personal standard as their leader.

Men, you don’t need your woman taking care of you – in fact you don’t need your woman at all.

This is the gift you need to give yourself this year; it’s also a gift that will ‘keep on giving’. As you accept the reality that your wife could leave at any moment, you can then begin to embrace the confidence that you would be alright. Go through the thought experiment, create a negative visualization in your mind and feel everything that you’d feel if she were to leave. Realize that with her gone, you should still be entirely secure with your ‘self’.

Now dial yourself back in and realize that your woman is still in your life. Find joy in that, smile at her, and appreciate the time you guys have together.

The fact of reality is this, the less you show ‘love’ the way society has taught you to show love, the more your wife will love you.

TV, movies, music, etc the all are pushing the female imperative, they are telling you to entirely devote yourself to your woman, to always self-sacrifice for her, and to make her the top priority in your life.

Negative.

Clear your mind of the poison society has injected you with. Let your masculine light shine.

Clear your mind of the poison society has injected you with. Let your masculine light shine.

This is not the path of the masculine man. The masculine man has his mission and he marches towards it with fierce tenacity. He allows his wife to walk this path with him, but she is company on this journey and is free to depart whenever she chooses to do so.

You can develop this mindset by developing the irrational levels of self-confidence which comes from action:

  • You have to start lifting as it will develop your physical strength and mental discipline.
  • You have to start raising your personal standard of hygiene, grooming, and fashion. This will lead to an increase in IOIs from other women which will break the oneitis and build confidence that if your woman were to leave, she could be replaced.
  • You have to start building a life separate from your woman. Whether it be writing, building a car, going to an MMA gym, joining some sort of gun club – something; you have to develop a life outside of your wife so that if she were to leave you don’t lose everyone you know and every hobby you had ‘together’.
  • You have to read up on game, kino, the art of debate & discourse, and truly internalize the truth of reality which is provided to you by the manosphere. You can’t just ‘think’ you need to own this life and put yourself first but rather truly embody your masculine nature.

Once you take these actions you will begin to see that your woman will love you more and that you are more confident. Without the fear of losing your life if you lose your woman you will be more prone to taking bolder actions and further pursuing your mission in this life. You’ll find that by following my steps of creating a ‘self’ who does not need his woman but has rather chosen to have her in his life, you now further appreciate the moments you have with her.

Your entire quality of life will rise when you accept that you are in total control of this life. You’ll realize that the ‘training wheels’ which kept you safe, also kept you from steering off the road.

Remove the safety net and you’ll be able to take the more difficult path of masculine adventure. It’s the one less ventured and for men living a genuine life, it’s the only path.

Hunter

I write for free, but if you feel the need to compensate for the benefit this article may have provided to you in your life – I’d be most humbled and appreciative.

Donate