The Suicide Solution Part One: Shunning the Shame of Being A Man

The Male Suicide Solution
Modern man is suicidal.

Did you know that today’s men are four times more likely to commit suicide than their female contemporaries?

This begs several questions:  How did we arrive at this contemptible destination? And what are the societal factors leading to males having such suicidal tendencies? Most importantly, how do we reverse this disturbing trend?

The feminists among us are quick to place the blame squarely at the feet of men like myself and Hunter who’re admonishing men to reclaim their rightful position within the family and society by expressing their masculinity and taking full responsibility for their life’s circumstances.

Suicide is an unacceptable selfish display of weakness, but so is speaking anything less than the truth for fear that it may hurt a few feelings.

So it is that I’m compelled to proclaim the truth that man is both the source of, and solution for, most of his life’s problems.

Have men become so soft that merely suggesting they take responsibility for the consequences of their behaviors is now enough to send them hurling toward a premature death by their own hands?

I think not. What’s happening is the inevitable result of men not being told the truth.

The message of personal responsibility we’re working to bring to the forefront can’t be a significant contributor to the epidemic of male suicide. For it’s hardly even heard.

For every Craig James and Hunter Drew throwing ropes of personal responsibility to our brethren, there are a thousand others working to convince them they’re powerless to affect change in their lives. They’re told everything undesirable about their lives is someone or something else’s fault.

Don’t earn as much money as you’d like? You’re the victim of a greedy capitalist society in which all the evil one percenters refuse to pay their fair share.

Have a body that’s fat, weak and unattractive? It’s your genetics. The five thousand fast food and soda calories you’re gorging on every day has nothing to do with it.

Can’t get an attractive girl to go out with you? Why, that’s only because society has conditioned women to view the ideal man as being strong, fit and healthy – all the things you aren’t.

The obvious overwhelming tilt of society is to convince others to play the victim and excuse away any notion that an individual might actually be culpable when his life isn’t turning out the way he’d hoped.

Men are being fed a batch of lies from birth. They eventually believe these lies, which shape who they are and the choices they live by. What they’re never told is that living in defiance of reality comes with cataclysmic consequences.

The personal-responsibility-abolishing ideas society is foisting upon men are driving them far from their innate masculine drive to lead, learn from their mistakes, and pursue excellence. It is instead leading them down a path of purposelessness and self destruction that offers no hope of better days to come.

I balk at the notion that men like me are responsible in any way for men taking their own lives.

Moreover, I take seriously the onus that is on those of us who have the solution to not selfishly hoard it to ourselves.

So, to my brothers feeling lost, purposeless, depressed, or suicidal, take solace.

It’s time for you to finally begin living life to the fullest by unleashing your authentic masculinity on the world.

And this starts with shunning the shame you’re told to feel for simply being a man.

Shunning the Shame of Being a Man

Shunning the Shame of Being a Man

Men are told from the time they’re barely old enough to talk that to be bold, assertive, aggressive, competitive, or to engage in violence, even when perfectly justified, is to behave in a way that is toxic to themselves and to society.

They’re living in the shadow of the shame that’s posited to them just for existing and having a Y-chromosome.

A young impressionable mind can only be beaten with a club of lies for so long before those lies begin to ring true. Perception becomes reality.

And so we have males suffering from gender dysphoria at an unprecedented rate, young boys being given medication to suppress their masculine energy that is pretentiously diagnosed as ADHD, and young men being tagged as misogynists and mansplainers for daring to correct lies being spread by any human with a vagina between her legs.

Then, as grown men they’re told that they’re guilty by association every time a woman is raped, a mass shooting is committed, or any other act of violence is perpetrated by a man. You know, the whole toxic masculinity schtick.

Men are being told that everything that makes them who they are is toxic (In case you’re curious, here’s what I think about ‘toxic masculinity’). And so males work overtime to separate themselves from their innate masculine nature, which they can never do.

Attempting to do so comes at a high price.

Today’s men are suicidal, yes. Of course they are.

But it’s not a consequence of them freely expressing their masculinity. On the contrary, it’s because their masculine fire is being snuffed out by a society bent on extinguishing it completely.

Men are weak, timid, and downright afraid to confront the world around them, even as their souls cry out from within, begging them to exterminate the parasite of emasculation that is feeding on their spirit and slowly killing them from the inside out.

Contrary to what we’re told, the solution lies with strengthening men, not continuing to further emasculate them.

Are you ashamed of being born a man? Do you allow that shame to hold power over how you conduct yourself for fear of what others may think of you for expressing your authentic masculine nature?

If so, that needs to end here and now.

It’s time for you to speak boldly and with clarity, to live a disciplined life, and to train your body in order to harness the output of masculine strength for which it has been designed. And don’t forget to start having some fun.

It’s time that you begin to smile in the rubble. Instead of fear and cowardice, display courage and irrational confidence in the face of uncertainty, adversity and all who would vilify your masculinity. It’s time you double down on those who wish to shame you for living out your masculine nature with 100% authenticity and never apologize for it.

We have nothing to be ashamed of for being born as men. In fact, it is we who should be relentlessly shaming the fearful and insecure mobs who would dare devalue all that it means to be a man.

It angers me to know that men are killing themselves over something as nonsensical as the lies that others are projecting on them. Yet here we are.

You must never allow the opinions of others to keep you from living life on your own terms, according to the standards that you’ve set for yourself.

To consider taking your own life because of what others think of you – or expect from you – is the epitome of mental enslavement. You must choose to be the sole source of the expectations that are set for how you will live as a man.

This isn’t the responsibility of anybody else. It’s yours alone.

You either live out your personal convictions as a man or have your masculinity stripped from you, living as an impotent pawn who exists for appeasing the convictions of others.

It is this pervading appeasement mindset that will be the topic of part 2 in this series, to be released later this week.

Until then, break the mold, begin expressing your masculinity without apology, and don’t be afraid to let out a good mocking chuckle at those who attempt to denigrate you for nothing more than being a man.

– Craig James (@CraigJamesTFA)

P.S. – This is part three of a four-part series dedicated to combating the problem of male suicide. Click the links below to read the other parts in the series.

The Suicide Solution Part Two: Killing the Appeasement Mindset

The Suicide Solution Part Three: Finding Peace in Purpose

The Suicide Solution Part Four: Find Your Masculine Tribe

  • wes says:

    Great article. As a man who has been a depressive suicidal on and off for his adult life I’ve got to say I agree with this, BUT I think you missed dealing with our personal shame, not the shame of society.

    I’m 33 and have a lot of shame about who I’ve become. Shame about even feeling like this. Shame that I could never focus on my own life and goals because I’ve always been running away through alcohol, weed, tobacco, excessive masterbation and porn, movies, netflix, video games… pretty much anything other than real life. I am headed in a different direction now and have specific goals and hobbies which I love. I’m trying to give myself internal validation instead of getting validation through women, my parents, and society.

    I’m on day 18 of nofap, gave up weed and tobacco. Alcohol is reserved for social gatherings. It’s such a big mountain to climb and I’m so behind the curb that I feel overwhelmed. I never developed the skills to cope with life. I like my job even though I don’t make more than 15K a year. Relationships seem impossible for me. 33 is a hard age to start over. I wouldn’t wish how I feel on anybody. I hope if any young man feeling suicidal is reading this know that you have the time to start a life. I pretty much feel fucked even though I’m doing my best.

    • Craig James says:

      Thanks Wes. This is only part 1 of what will be a 4-part series. I will be addressing personal shame in part 2.

      You’ll notice that much of your shame is due to your perception of how others view you. This leads to dangerous activities to suppress the anxiety.

      Set your own standard. Write it down. Plan how you will adhere to it. Take action on your convictions daily. Never allow the opinions of others to sway your resolve.

      Become your own mental point of origin and the shame will start to disappear and allow for significant positive change to take place.

      • wes says:

        Thanks Craig. I look forward to your future work addressing this issue that a lot of men have as well as other topics. Thanks for your support. I’ll keep fighting the good fight, the alternative is unacceptable.

      • Craig James says:

        The alternative is indeed unacceptable. Men have only one choice for as long as we have breath in our lungs: fight for the life we desire.

  • rugby11 says:

    Because i am a Man

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