The Walking Dad
I’ve never watched the Walking Dead but what I have seen is enough commercials and people who love to talk about it so I have an idea as to what the show is about.
Keeping that in mind, when I think of The Walking Dead and try to relate it to the world we live in, what I envision is all of the fat men who are wandering around Target holding their womanâ€™s purse. All of those brain dead Dadbod zombies who are going from consumption to consumption.
You know the cycle:
- Guy wakes up late
- Eats crappy food
- Consumes bitter coffee
- Climbs into vehicle and listens to commercialized music
- Heads to a job that he hates
- Does that job for 8 hours
- Goes home and needs to “relax”
- Wastes rest of night scrolling Facebook looking up girls from high school
Repeat this for years…
- At no point in this daily cycle does this man generate a thought of his own.
- At no point does this man think, â€œhey, something isnâ€™t right.â€™ He might get the feeling, that hunch of â€˜somethingâ€™ being wrong, but like all of his masculine tendencies, he bottles that hunch up and shoves it deep down, way beneath his love for Lena Dunham.
- At no point does this man, who has had kids, think, â€œMaybe I should get involved in raising the standard of my children and their standard of life and self.â€ You see, his son has no idea how to be a man as his dad is more likely to support him dressing up like Hillary Clinton than teaching his son that boys and girls are not equals and his daughter has had a toxic example of what relationships are supposed to look like for so long that she thinks in marriage the man is supposed to be a weak doting buffoon.
Gentlemen, we donâ€™t need to watch a TV show on AMC to get our zombie fix. We have real world walking dead (dad) all around us.
It is with the greatest misfortune that a majority of these walking dead are walking dads. It is as though as soon as a man reproduces his brain becomes numb to any internal or external stimulus which will invoke passion or masculinity. It seems that the only motivation that sparks up is that of consumption.
Dads consume baby gifts, TVs, Beers, cars, houses, shitty clothes, and gym equipment which is never used (If itâ€™s bought at all).
Ask any father you know whether he has read to or with his kid in the past month and youâ€™d be hard pressed to find one who can say yes.
Ask one of the dads you know if he has brought his son to the outdoors or a gym to teach him something about the world or the beauty of physical strength; I doubt youâ€™ll get a yes.
Ask a man if heâ€™s ever had a conversation with his daughter about the importance of strength and smarts as opposed to physical beauty for advancement in life, do you get crickets?
Now, ask the dads around you if they know who A is from pretty little liars. Ask them if they know all the lines from Family Guy or The Simpsons. Ask these men if theyâ€™ve got the newest phone or their wife has the best iPad and Iâ€™m sure theyâ€™ll be pumped to tell you how fucking cool their gadgets are.
These “men”, they truly believe in the weak mantra of Happy Wife Happy Life
What can we do to fight these plugged in zombies?
Drop the cure of masculinity here and there via being a living example of whatâ€™s possible. The men in the Fraternity of Excellence are doing exactly that, they’re working together to become a living example of what ‘right’ looks like.
The solution to this epidemic is not to cut the heads off the zombies; but rather, to offer the cure. Some of these men are lost causes, do not expend too much energy on their behalf; if a man wants redemption, it wonâ€™t take much of a push as theyâ€™re already on the edge.
The cure for this zombie apocalypse is masculinity. Raw, powerful, lifesaving masculine power is what will cure these zombies, itâ€™s what will kill the Walking Dad.
Itâ€™s not just fathers, but the point remains that married men with kids are the hardest hit group of men out there. They are the population I have found myself a part of (Married with kids not walking dad), so itâ€™s the group that has received the most of my attention. We need to act as examples and lay some lines here and there that inject the truth of reality into these lifeless souls.
Maybe it will enter the blood stream and cure the individual or maybe it will dissipate and the zombie will continue to live its perfect weak consumer lifestyle it has up to this pathetic point.
The consequences of being one of these â€˜Walking Dadsâ€™ goes way beyond having a dadbod and being afraid of conflict.
Let me paint a few pictures to illustrate the vast range of consequences that come from being a part of the Walking Dads:
- Dadbod zombie is walking down the street with his daughter who resents him, son who despises him, and wife who hasnâ€™t been attracted to him for the past 5 years. They come across a group of thugs who view them to be easy pickings as the dad is an obvious pushover and the rest of the family is oblivious to the threat as they havenâ€™t had a masculine leader to prepare them for the evil of the world.
Wife loses purse, husband and son get broken jaws, and daughter is traumatized from threats of thugs.
- Hillary Clinton wins election and an entire city erupts in rage as the system is rigged and the population can no longer bottle their rage at this, so riots rip through the city.
Walking dadbod doesnâ€™t know what to do so he sits inside with his girls and cries by their side. Days go by and still, nobody assumes the role of leader to help the family out of this situation. They live in the city, the streets arenâ€™t safe, the stores are closed, and itâ€™s going to be another few days before itâ€™s safe to leave their property. The family suffers, everyone is emotionally drained, and lack of preparation devastates them for the rest of their lives.
- Dadbod comes home to find his wife fucking another man. He is the poor pool boy who makes minimum wage, yet he is shredded and confident as hell. Wife says, â€œWhat? I needed a real man and we haven’t had sex in months.â€ Of course beta zombie husband has wanted to sleep with her, hard. But it never came to fruition as he was a nice guy and nice zombie men donâ€™t force sex.
Now he tells her he will take her back and he is sorry for not being the man she needed (See: Cuck).
- Walking Dad shuffles his soft fat ass into the Drâ€™s office where the family Dr. tells him that his heart is starting to fail and if he doesnâ€™t take immediate action he is going to die before heâ€™s 55.
- His T levels are checked, he’s at 420
- Zombie man has to watch his kids play in the ocean while he wears a shirt, has to watch his family zip line while he hangs out below, too heavy for the wires, and has to sit on the sideline while the rest of his family have amazing experiences because he lacks conditioning, strength, and is too heavy to go on any ride.
I could keep going, but Iâ€™ll stop because it really sucks to write this; these things keep me up at night. This is the reality many men are facing and itâ€™s depressing. Too many men are nothing more than walking wallets to their wife and kids.
Itâ€™s time to make a change gentlemen, itâ€™s time to take back what has been stripped of you, your balls and masculinity.
Draw a line in the sand, today.
Right now draw a line in the sand and say, â€œIt ends hereâ€
Start by refusing to reward failure; do not allow others to disrespect you or your opinion on certain matters.
Make your voice heard.
From there, earn the loyalty and respect that is taken by masculine men. Get control over your nutrition, grow some muscles and strength by getting your ass under the iron. Start running and doing bodyweight exercises, and add in some reading.
Remember, mental fitness is as important as physical so make time to train your mind while youâ€™re training your body.
Fix your sex life, your wife is a woman and needs you to be a god damn man, step up.
Sure, it sucks that youâ€™ve been a doormat for the past X amount of years, but those years are gone so reclaim your role in this family in the here and now.
If youâ€™ve made it this far then you are now presented with a choice. You can choose to reclaim your masculinity and live life as a real man or you can join the growing population of the Walking Dad.
Choose wisely, if you arenâ€™t with masculine men, then youâ€™re against them.
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